Sleeping to Dream
by Somah
Summary: The newspapers say it all: Bella Swan is dead. But no one is sure why she jumped from the cliffs at First Beach. No one really knows why her body wasn't ever found. But everyone knows her coffin is empty and that the Cullens are back.
1. Chapter 1 The Looking Glass

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****Chapter One--The Looking Glass**

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She looked around the run-down bar nervously and spotted the restroom sign, hanging crookedly next to a broken jukebox.

_I sure picked a quality place to indulge my vanity_, she thought bitterly. The smell was almost intolerable, but she would have to do her best.

_I have to do this_. Without meeting any curious stares, she walked quietly and uncomfortably towards the sign, keeping close to the cracked wall. This was not the type of place she felt at home in. One quick glance up confirmed what she'd been afraid of: every man in the decrepit bar was staring at her like she was their next mug of beer. The girl shuttered slightly and grabbed the "ladies" room door handle.

"She's a lady alright!" whistled a drunken voice from the bar. The girl did not look back.

_I doubt any lady has ever stepped foot in this bar_, she thought dryly, shaking her head at the crooked lettering. As her hand grasped and pulled at the dirty handle, she noticed how incredibly white her skin was. Her hand shook a little, but she forced herself out of the view of the gawking men and into the dingy, faded bathroom. She approached the sink and reached for the tap, ignoring the black spider that crawled lazily around the drain. In her past life, she would have yelped at the sight, found her Raid, and sprayed at the spider from ten feet away. But now--but now.

She pulled the sleeve of her long sleeved blue v-neck--a shirt she'd been wearing for the past, how many days? Six?...Seven? --over her hand and wiped at the dirty mirror. She glanced into the small circular area she had cleaned…and froze. Who was that staring back at her? She glanced over her shoulder, but she knew there was no one behind her. She leaned in closer; this was why she was risking everything. She had to know how she'd changed.

The eyes. They shone back at her, not her normal warm chocolate colour, but a brilliant golden blaze…full of something terrifying, something that had not been there only a week ago. A week. She closed her eyes briefly and pushed back the flash of memories that wanted so badly to make themselves known. She shook her head and opened her eyes. _Be strong_.

Her eyes moved away from themselves and focussed on her hair. She had never particularly liked her hair. She had thought of it as mousy, brown and slightly boring. It tended to ignore her efforts and do as it wished. But now, instead of hating the waves that she could never tame, she knew there was something different about her hair. She put a pale hand up and touched a tendril that had fallen from her ponytail. Soft and so shiny. Longer than she remembered with a look of beautifully disheveled wildness that framed her striking heart-shaped face.

Everything about her felt the same—but different. When she wasn't starving, she felt stronger. Her small, slim frame looked the same, but she could feel the strength emanating from her. That was part of it, she knew. She had been told, mockingly, right before—right before It had happened. Before. What else happened Before? But she wasn't ready. She squeezed her eyes shut once more. She was afraid. When she wasn't afraid, she was hungry. She figured she'd rather focus on her fear, rather than her hunger. Hunger got her nowhere good and fear kept her safe.

She washed her hands and glanced around the tiny bathroom, spotting a small window. She could fit. The last thing she felt like doing was walking back through that bar, holding the breath she didn't really have. She was pretty sure she wouldn't make her escape quite so easily, in fact, she could hear the men talking about her from where she stood. Her sense of smell and hearing had also been affected. She could hear things she never noticed before. The sound of an insect's wings, the quietest whisper, the smallest sigh. It was annoying. She knocked out the screen and quickly and quietly pulled herself through, arching her back and landing gracefully on the other side of the window_. I've never been graceful in my entire life_. She knew that about herself. She could remember the little things. But not much else. She wasn't sure she was ready to remember.

Just as she began to walk away--now outside the seedy, rundown bar--one of the men from inside spotted her from the large window on the other side and yelled furiously. She gathered the last bit of strength she had took off at a sprint—a sprint that found her miles away in a couple of seconds. She stopped, looked behind her, down the road…and finally ducked into the dark woods off to the side of the road. She was exhausted and hunger was starting to beckon. She needed to be—away.

Sleep. Maybe if she got some sleep, she would feel better. She walked far enough to feel like she was untraceable, found a small cave and curled up, making herself as small as she could.

Sleep. Ha. What was she thinking. She hadn't been able to sleep days...a week? I will never be able to sleep again.


	2. Chapter 2 An Empty Bloody Coffin

**Chapter Two- An Empty Bloody Coffin**

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He ripped the poster from the side of the grocery store with so much force that the building shook—but he didn't notice or care. Edward Cullen felt the un-mistakable feeling of reality sink in as he stared at her picture. His Bella, his perfect, beautiful Bella, smiled back up at him apprehensively. Edward recognized the picture right away. In fact, he had watched the picture being snapped, standing only a few feet away grinning crokedly at her expression. It had been senior picture day and Bella had hated every second of it, especially the cap and gown. Edward's jaw clenched. He closed his eyes quickly and took a breath. He opened them again and took in the words under the picture.

**Missing**

**Bella Marie Swan, age 18**

**Last seen in the waters near the shore of First Beach**

**Please, if you have any information regarding her disappearance, call Charlie Swan at 844-3378 or 566-7777.**

He clutched the poster tightly to his chest, ignoring the whispers in his head. His family was nearby and he could hear every single thought they would have liked to conceal…full of pity, heart-break, sadness, but mostly, full of worry. Edward pushed it all away and glanced at the poster one more time. There was still hope.

"Edward?" spoke up Alice, her small hand touching his shoulder. He kept his eyes trained on the poster, a million thoughts running through his head.

"What if she's out there, Alice? What if she was swept away and knocked out and.."

"The Forks police have searched everywhere. And so have we. We haven't found a thing", she replied softly.

"They had divers comb the area. There was no body," Edward spoke, finally turning to look at his sister, pleadingly, his eyes full of pain. He needed someone—he needed Alice, to believe him. Bella could not be dead. But Edward heard her thoughts before she could answer. _Bella is dead. They've already buried her._

"It's an empty bloody coffin, Alice. Bella is not inside. She's alive," his voice came out quiet, but menacing. Alice's eyes widened at his tone.

"Alice, Edward, we need to leave," spoke a new voice quietly from the near-by woods. No human would be able to hear Edward's father, Carlisle Cullen. But the Cullen's were far from human.

"I'll catch up with you," Edward abruptly turned his back on Alice, staring out in the direction of La Push.

"Edward…we can't be seen here. Not without a story. Everything they know about Bella and how you…" she paused, her voice thick, "how we left. They will get suspicious," she finished, clearing her throat quickly.

"Let them. I'm here to find Bella. That's my story. Bella is still alive and someone knows something. She's here…somewhere. Scared. Alone."

"Edward, please," Alice began.

"Go, Alice!" Edward clenched his jaw again at the harsh tone of his voice. He took a breath, fighting for control. "Please. Just leave me for awhile. I need—I need some time. I'll see you back at the old house."

Alice studied her brother's tensed neck.

"You know we can't stay here long, Edward. Not all of us. If you're choosing to show yourself, you need a good story, or no one is going to tell you anything. You will be the suspect," Alices's voice wavered.

"What did you see?" Edward whirled around at the sound of warning in her voice. Alice glanced away.

"Charlie arrests you, Edward. Be careful."

_And don't so anything stupid. Or if you do, call me so I can join in. _Added a voice that could only be his brother Emmett's.

And she was gone. They all were, finally. He had been under close surveillance by his family ever since Alice's vision. Edward felt his shoulders slump. He felt all the adrenaline leave his body. He slowly slid down the wall of the grocery store until he was sitting on the hard gravel. He pulled his knees up and let his head drop to his hands. And for the first time since he'd found out his Bella was "dead" or missing, Edward allowed himself to feel the pain he'd let build up inside. Not just the pain of leaving Bella months before. That was painful, but in an old familiar way. This was a new pain, one that was ripping him up from the inside and slowly tearing itself out. He wanted to scream. To cry out in rage. To smash the concrete wall with his fist. Maybe even his head—_I should have done that long ago. What the hell was I thinking? How could I do this to her?_

He knew this had happened because of him. Because he had left. How did he ever think it was a good idea to leave her? Bella Swan, his Bella, who could always make the safest thing imaginable a death-trap. But, at the time, Edward had thought that the best thing for Bella was to get on with her life as a human. He and his family were only endangering her life further by being in it. He loved her so much…so much that he had been so sure that the only way she could possibly be happy was if he wasn't in her life. And yet now…

He and his family had arrived in Forks the moment the news found them through Alice, which had just over 24 hours ago. Alice had had a vision, one she had not meant to have. She had seen a vision of Charlie watching a casket being lowered into the ground. She had seen Bella's grave marker. She had watched as Bella's school friends sobbed into each other's arms. She witnessed as Bella's mother screamed in denial, clutching Charlie's shoulder. She had seen tears, pain and loss.

Alice, at first, had not known what to do with the vision. Edward knew she'd kept it from him as long as she could, which, because of his talent, lasted only a couple of hours as she focused her mind on reciting Chaucer's Canterbury Tales in order to keep him out. It was actually Alice's mate Jasper whose mind had registered so much shock that Edward could "hear" it from another part of town. He didn't want to relieve those moments after he found out. Instead, he recalled Alice's desperate attempt to keep him off the plane to Italy, to end his life by the hand of the Volturri.

Alice had seen something more…a poster. A poster with Bella's picture on it that had the words "Missing" on them. And that was why they had come back, only 24 hours ago. Edward felt that poster was the only thing he had to hold onto. The only reason why he was still alive at that very moment. His family—even Rosalie, despite her past dislike for Bella—had joined in their attempts to find out what had happened the day Bella had allegedly died. But there wasn't much. The police had searched thoroughly and found nothing…they had searched the entire forested area and found nothing. Nobody had seen anything. It was like she had just simply disappeared.

And then there was Jacob Black. Edward growled quietly at the thought of the name. He knew that his next move had to be to question the person who had seen Bella last. According to the newspapers, Bella had jumped off a cliff at First Beach. The story reported that she and Jacob had planned on jumping together, but when she arrived at the Blacks house that day and Jacob hadn't been around, she took off for the beach. A witness at First Beach said they saw someone jump from one of the cliffs around the time of Bella's disappearance and splash into the icy waters below. When Jacob had arrived five minutes after the sighting, he reportedly dove into the water and swam out from the shore. He reported glimpsing Bella's bobbing head once, way out in the distance. She had screamed once. But that was it. He couldn't find her…not a trace. And that was the last anyone had seen of Bella.

Edward squeezed his eyes tightly shut again, shutting out the image of Bella falling from the cliffs, scared and alone. Instead, he focused on her eyes, her lips, her skin. Her smile. Her scent. Her. Everything about Bella has more than amazing to Edward. He had been initially called by her blood. It was the most intoxicating scent he had ever experienced. He had almost killed her, on several occasions, to drain her body of the smell and taste he craved so badly…but then, as he got to know Bella, he could not imagine a world without her warm, beautiful presence. And there was more to Bella than just the blood that sang to him. Quickly, Edward learned that he could not hear her thoughts, like he could for every other person around him. Her head was silent and this intrigued him enough to begin talking to her. It didn't take him long to realize she fascinated him—in every way. She was not like all high school humans. She was smart, she thought differently; she was always surprising him.

Edward found himself completely and indescribably in love with Bella Swan. Everything about her drew him in. She was like a drug he couldn't get enough of. He had wanted to spend every second of every day with her. But his family had put her life in danger multiple times…and when Edward had made the impossible decision to leave Bella forever he nearly hadn't survived. The only way he could possibly go on was with the knowledge that she was happy, healthy and alive. Now, Edward desperately needed to see her alive. He needed her in his arms. He needed her smell, her smile and her touch. He knew he couldn't live without her, didn't want to live without her. The worst part was that he had known deep down inside that he couldn't stay away from her. He had only been weeks away from coming back to Forks to see her. He was nothing without her—the months spanning his departure had been the longest and worst of his 107 years. He needed his Bella. What had stopped him was that he wasn't sure she needed him anymore.

_What's happened to you in those months, Bella? How did you come to jump off a cliff? Were you running from something? Did this have to do with Jacob?_

Edward had to find out. He had to find Jacob—he was sure Jacob held some of the answers he needed in order to find his Bella. But how was he suposed to get to Jacob? Jacob lived on land he was not allowed to walk on.

Edward sprang to his feet, renewed in his quest. Determined. He knew he had to stay inconspicuous, because he knew Alice was right. If anyone saw him, they would be suspicious. He knew he would become a suspect, especially with Charlie Swan as police chief. Edward had a feeling chief Swan would not like to see the face of the man who had hurt his daughter.

Night had fallen, but even so, Edward stuck to the long shadows, scanning through the voices in his head, listening, and waiting. He slipped into the forest and headed towards La Push, stopping short of the boundary line…a line that had been determined many years ago. But that was far enough. He heard Jacob's people.

As the voices became louder and more clear, he found himself tuning into one particular voice and before long, Edward knew where Jacob should be.

Edward turned in a familiar direction, hesitating for only a second and took off to Charlie Swan's place of residence. Bella's home.


	3. Chapter 3 Monster

**Just a quick note between chapters--I wanted to send a huge thank you to everyone who is 1.) reading my story and 2.) leaving me reviews/comments. I appreciate each and every one of them and I'll respond to anyone that comments (good or bad!)...gives me the warm fuzzies knowing you guys have been enjoying (or hating it enough to leave me hate mail!)**

**And just incase the time-line has been confusing (like it is to Bella!) I just wanted to clarify--Bella jumped from the cliff a week ago. The Cullens found out just over 24 hours ago (mere hours before Bella's body was "burried") and have only been a town for maybe 12 hours. Not long.**

**Now get back to the story and then leave me some love :)**

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Chapter Three - Monster

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The dream startled her.

_It began happy. She was in the forest, in a meadow. A place she knew well, but couldn't quite recall how or why. She was with Jacob. Jacob in wolf form. She was on her back, laughing, as Jacob ran around the meadow, playfully nipping at her as he passed by. As he came towards her for the third time, his tongue lolling from his wide mouth—a mouth that always seemed to be grinning at her—she knew that something was different. As he neared her, he suddenly morphed into a human. But it wasn't Jacob, it was Edward. She felt her heart constrict._

"_Bella! Run!" he yelled, as he hurled himself at her. On her feet in half a second, she couldn't take her eyes off Edward's approaching form._

"_You—you came back for me?" she whispered. Nothing else seemed to matter except what came out of his mouth next. _

"_Get away from me, Bella!" he screamed, his voice full of horror. As he lunged at her frozen body, he suddenly transformed into something else. Bright, fiery red hair, beautiful feminine face and blazing dark eyes. It was Her. The fiery monster landed in front of her, grabbed her by the neck and with a laugh of pure pleasure, sank her teeth deep into Bella's tender, white flesh and ripped._

Bella's eyes popped open in fear. She glanced around the dark cave, searching. But she was alone. She shivered and wrapped her arms around her legs. These "day dreams" had been taking her by surprise ever since--ever since she had stopped being herself.

_Bella._ She was Bella. She squeezed her eyes shut. She wasn't ready to remember Edward. Thinking his name alone made her heart ache and her body sink into itself. He felt like a very long time ago. Another life time ago. And yet…she longed for him, this man she knew she shouldn't be thinking of. A man who had caused her immeasurable amounts of pain.

_You…don't want me?_

Bella shook it out of her head. _No. I can't fall apart._ She got up from the floor of the cave and glanced around the darkness. Her stomach rumbled and she knew she needed to eat; she had been ignoring the rumblings too long and she knew there would be consequences.

The monster that did this to her, the fiery monster had told her she would be killing humans before long. _Perhaps_, the red hair had whispered into her ear, _perhaps even Charlie. Or Jacob._

Bella's hands flew to her face. Her father, Charlie! But she couldn't have…she didn't_. No_, she told herself fiercely, _you didn't_. She had found quite early on that the smell of human blood disgusted her. It was not at all like what the--what they, his family, had spoken of. There was no lure, no blood-song…blood smelled just as horrible to vampire Bella as it had to human Bella. _Figures_, she thought to herself, _I can't even get being a vampire right._ Truthfully though, Bella was more than relieved. She had been so scared that once she was turned, she would become like the out of control monsters of her nightmares…exactly what she--_Victoria_ (Bella cringed at the thought of the very name) had wanted to her to be. Victoria had expected that she would kill her family, her friends. But Bella knew she wasn't close to home. And she hadn't been hungry enough to kill an animal…or a human.

But she found herself less worried about her next meal and more worried about what she was should do. What did her friends and family think happened to her? The last thing she had done before Victoria had found her was jump off a cliff into the icy water. The last person she had seen was Jacob, as she floundered helplessly in the waves, fighting the pull of Victoria, who grabbed at her ankles from below the water.

_Jacob_. Sadness washed over Bella as she thought of her best friend. Her sunshine. Her happy magnet. Her constant friend, her protector. What would Jacob think of her now, now that she was a bloodsucker, his enemy…the very reason he was a werewolf. Bella shivered again at the thought of his pure hatred for vampires. If she went back, would he try to kill her?

_If I went back…_She knew it couldn't be a good idea. She knew that. And yet, the lure of seeing Charlie and Jacob…one last time…was un-deniable. She needed to say good-bye, even if it was a hidden good-bye. She needed human closure. She needed to let Human Bella go and Human Bella's memories and life die. She wasn't exactly Bella anymore.

And yet she was. She thought she'd feel much different. When she wanted so badly to be changed with …with Edward, she had this notion that she would be completely different…that she might very well lose who she was as a human. But she felt the same. She knew she was more powerful and more beautiful than Human Bella—but the thoughts were the same. Her wants hadn't changed either. She still wanted…but he didn't want her. He'd been very clear. And now, she was a vampire, like him. _Maybe…_But she shook the thought out of her head. Those questions could only lead her to bad places and Bella had enough to worry about at the moment.

_Food first_, she thought. _Plan later_.


	4. Chapter 4 Confrontation

**Warning: This chapter contains a little bit of swearing. Seemed Jacob-appropriate, though Bella wouldn't approve :D**

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**Chapter Four – Confrontation**

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Jacob Black, his head low, hands in his pockets, stepped quickly down from the Swan's front porch as Charlie Swan watched from behind the screen door.

"Careful driving home, Jacob," he called. Jacob gave him a nod without raising his head.

"And we'll find her, Jake. We will," Charlie said softly. At that, Jacob turned and looked into Bella's fathers eyes. He saw that Charlie truly believed what he said. Charlie Swan, still in the black suit he had worn to his daughter's funeral the day before, believed his own words one-hundred percent.

Jacob gave him a weak smile and waved once more, heading towards his car. He'd much rather run back home, but unfortunately, Charlie wasn't aware of one small fact about him--that he was a werewolf. He needed his car for the pretense.

The pretense. Jacob scowled. He wasn't even sure anymore what that meant. Was he pretending that they hadn't buried Bella 24 hours ago? Or was he pretending that they had?

He wanted desperately to possess the faith that Charlie held—that Bella was still out there. And yet, he had been the one to see her. His beautiful Bella, his best friend. He had witnessed her drowning. He had seen the terror on her face. But he hadn't been able to save her. She was gone because he couldn't save her. If he wanted to back up even further, Bella was gone because he'd been too busy that morning to meet her.

_You were protecting her_, _how were you to know she would chose that day to jump from the cliff?_ Sam had argued after hearing Jacob's thoughts of guilt and pain.

They had been at such a great place together. Jacob finally felt that Bella was moving on from all the pain the bloodsucker had caused her. She seemed almost—Bella again. She had been smiling a lot, laughing. Jacob's heart swelled with love at the thought of his best friend's laughter. Sharing a joke, a smile. _She's gotta be out there, I can't survive without hearing that laugh again_. There was a void inside Jacob, and it hurt more than he could say. He needed Bella back.

Jacob was lost in a memory of Bella as he pulled over to the side of the road, driving his car into some thick bushes. He wanted to run tonight. He would pick up his car later. As he locked the door and turned to depths of the dark forest, he suddenly paused and sniffed the air. A foul smell met his sensitive nostrils and he grew more alert, ready to morph at any second.

"Jacob Black?" questioned a voice from the trees. Jacob spun around, trying to find the source.

"Who's there?" he called out, not afraid, but tense and ready.

"I never would have thought…but it makes sense…when did you before a wolf, Jacob?"

Jacob looked into the woods, incredulously. Who--? But there could only be one answer. Jacob snarled.

"Show yourself, Cullen. Show yourself for the coward, the bastardly coward that you are!" he yelled, feeling himself start to lose control. He turned in a slow circle, his sharp eyes scanning the woods around him.

Suddenly, a cold arm was around his neck, choking him. Jacob clawed viciously at the stone that cut into his own warm flesh.

"What happened to her?" whispered the voice threateningly, "What happened to Bella?"

Jacob yanked himself out of Edward Cullen's grip, surprising the vampire with his strength and causing him to step back.

"Don't touch me," he spat. "Don't you fucking touch me." Jacob's heart raced as he took the vampire in. Paler than he remembered. Large dark circles under his black eyes. Hair sticking out haphazardly. Definitely not the neat, groomed vampire Jacob remembered from Bella's prom all those months ago.

"Haven't been getting a lot of sleep, Jacob," spoke Edward dryly, hearing Jacob's thoughts. Jacob stared at Edward.

"Right. She told me you could do that," he sneered.

"Bella," he practically choked out her name, his black eyes pleading. The pain was evident, even to Jacob. "What happened to her?" he asked again, his arms dropping to his side, the fight leaving his cold body.

But a spoken answer was un-necessary. Edward heard it all in Jacob's head as he played back the events. Jacob watched as Edward's face crumbled.

"There was even a funeral. Casket and all," Jacob said, glaring at the vampire, his eyes full of hate.

"Why…why was Bella jumping off a cliff?" asked Edward, shaking the funeral images from his head.

Jacob lowered his head and took a deep breath.

_Because she loved doing dangerous things. Because I wasn't around like I'd promised but she wanted to do it anyways. She jumped without me and disappeared._

"Bella liked doing dangerous things?" Edward questioned doubtfully.

"Yeah. She did. Guess you didn't know her that well. Broke her heart and left her destroyed, you filthy bloodsucker."

And then Jacob shot out a mental image of how Bella looked when she had come to him that day, months ago, with the pair of beat up motorcycles.

"She was a shell, leech, a shell of Bella Swan. There wasn't anything left in her; she was barely holding herself together. Her arms were constantly wrapped around her body tightly. I think she was afraid she was going to fall apart, otherwise." _I was afraid she was going to fall apart._

Edward was horrified at what he saw. What he'd done to his Bella.

"I left her to protect her," he whispered.

"You left because you didn't want her anymore," Jacob spat back, his voice shaking with anger.

"No," whispered Edward, the image of his broken Bella dancing across his mind. "I left for you, Bella. It was dangerous, I was too danger--" Edward's voice broke and he squeezed shut his eyes, not caring if Jacob Black was there to witness his pain.

Jacob glared at the vampire angrily and shot another image at him. Edward looked up, his eyes meeting Jacob's. Bella, looking much happier--hanging out with Jacob in his garage—laughing, smiling.

"Thank you," he said quietly.

"That wasn't supposed to make you feel better. That was to show you that she got on with her life. You broke Bella, but she was able to be put back together. She was so much happier." Jacob trailed off and looked away. _So much happier. And then she was gone_

"Because of you. You helped her," stated Edward, feeling both jealous and grateful.

"She was so god-damn heart-broken," Jacob muttered. Edward cringed at the zombie-Bella image again.

And again, the image shifted. Bella and Jacob sitting on a bench in a movie theatre lobby, holding hands. Edward winced, his fingers clenched, but instead of punching Jacob Black in the face, he filed the image away in his head. He would deal with that later. He pressed on.

"You're the last one that saw her. Do you think she's alive--somewhere? Lost, maybe?" Edward asked as he listened to Jacob's thoughts of Bella's last few moments; her head bobbing in the water, her yell of panic…and then nothing. He didn't need Jaspers talent to feet Jacob's helplessness as he dove down into the depths of the ocean, searching in vain for the girl he would never find.

"I don't know how she can be," admitted Jacob, his voice gruff with emotion. He turned his head slightly out of the moon-light, not wanting Edward Cullen to witness his grief. But his thoughts betrayed his words and Edward saw that he was clinging to a desperate hope.

"No body," said Edward softly.

"No body," replied Jacob. "But where could she be? Every square inch has been searched. Charlie has left no rock unturned. There are posters everywhere. It has been a week. No Bella."

"And still, no body," repeated Edward. He needed someone, even if it was Jacob Black, a werewolf also in love with his Bella, to be on his side.

"No body," echoed Jacob weakly.

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose between his forefinger and thumb.

"Maybe she doesn't want to be found," he said suddenly, looking up at the moon.

Jacob stared at him, incredulously.

"Right. Bella faked a drowning and is hiding out in a cave--perfectly fine--enjoying the comforts of the great outdoors. Probably cooking up a s'more as we speak. Sounds like Bella."

But Jacob's sarcasm couldn't rattle Edward as he shook his head.

"She's not dead," was all he could answer.

"Right, cause you have such a connection with her and everything," said Jacob sarcastically.

"I would feel it. I would know." Edward had to believe that

Jacob rolled his eyes.

"I didn't see you come running back when that other leech nearly killed her. In fact, I do believe it was me that saved Bella."

Edward's head snapped up. His eyes narrowed into slits.

"What did you say?"

He listened as Jacob went through the scene. Bella in their meadow. Laurant getting ready to bite Bella. Jacob and his pack tearing him to pieces.

"No." Edward swore, his mind working quickly. Jacob laughed bitterly.

"My, my…Edward Cullen swears. Too bad I don't have my video camera with me," he snickered. Before he could react, Edward had him pinned against a tree.

"I know you think you're clever, Black. You think you're stronger than me. Don't let Laurant's weakness misguide you," Edward let go. Jacob growled in anger, stumbled forward and spun around. But before he could lunge, Edward had disappeared.

"We're not done, Cullen!" yelled Jacob, his laugher sounding hysterical, even in his own ears. "I killed one of you once before. Cross my path again and you will be sorry."

But something was bothering Jacob and it had to do with the look he'd seen on Edward's face, right before he had pinned him. Like he'd found a missing puzzle piece. Jacob couldn't shake the feeling that Edward has figured something out. Something Jacob had told him had clicked. Jacob thought hard, his mind racing. _What? What did I miss?_

And then it clicked. And Jacob couldn't have felt more stupid. The pack had chased her to Canada. But she had made her escape...in the water. After everything with Bella, he had completely forgotten--none of it had seemed relavant anymore, when his best friend had just drown. But now--_shit._

Jacob morphed quickly and took off into the darkness.

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	5. Chapter 5 The World Spins Madly

Chapter 5 The World Spins Madly

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Bella was repulsed by what she had just done. The smell of the deer's blood was overwhelmingly horrible.

_How am I supposed to drink this?_ She wondered, staring woozily at the slaughtered deer she'd easily chased and successfully killed, much to her own amazement.

_I can't do this. I'm going to puke. _Bella turned her head away from the still-warm animal and closed her eyes briefly_. How did the Cullen's do this? I thought I was going to practically lust for blood._ And yet, she was weak and was growing weaker by the hour.

_I'll die if I don't eat. Or do something incredibly stupid. _

Bella turned back to the deer carcass and bent down, inching closer, avoiding looking into the dead glazed-over deer eye-ball.

"Sorry, deer," she muttered. Covering her eyes with one hand, she lowered the other hand to the deer's neck and dipped a finger reluctantly into the blood seeping from a wound in its neck. She slowly brought it to her lips, peeking at the dark liquid coating her finger. Cautiously, she touched her tongue to the sticky mess.

"Gah!" she exclaimed, so loudly she caused a nearby bird to squawk in surprise. Bella spit the blood out and wrinkled her nose, quickly wiping her finger on a near-by leaf.

"Disgusting," she muttered, annoyed. But she was surprised. _Blood is supposed to drive me crazy. The smell, the taste. What's wrong with me?_ Bella sat back on her heels and glared at the dead deer, considering.

"Well, crap. What do I do now?" she asked out loud. Her stomach growled angerly in response and she closed her eyes.

"Fine!"

And without thinking about it for another second, Bella ripped into the deer's throat and drank without tasting.

_Hambergers, pizza, spaghetti, apple pie, chocolate,_ she chanted to herself. She kept on drinking until she couldn't stand it anymore and then pulled back, wiping her mouth in disgust.

"That so was not chocolate," she muttered, clutching her stomach.

But something was wrong. The ground started to tilt and Bella found herself desperately clinging to the leaf-covered forest floor. Her whole world was suddenly spinning madly around. She couldn't see. She couldn't even hear anymore.

_What's happening to me?_

The terrified question clung with her for a moment—but the darkness acted quickly and soon, Bella lay motionless.

* * *

**Just a quick thank you to those who keep reading on..I really appreciate it! Please, after reading, leave me a comment/review...let me know how I'm doing (what you're liking/what could be better...), this is my first fan-fic (on-line, anyways!) and all criticsm is welcome. Thanks guys and happy weekend :D**


	6. Chapter 6 All Part of the Plan

Chapter 6 **All Part of the Plan**

* * *

Edward finished speaking. Silence met his ears, but not his mind; he could hear the flurry of thoughts as they processed what he had told them.

_How could he let this happen?_

_She's dead, then._

_She won't stop. We've got to get to her and--_

_Why can't I see anything?_

_Oh, Bella. This was never supposed to happen to you._

He turned his head and tried to ignore them as they each put what they were thinking in order. His eyes rested upon his baby grand piano. He hadn't played since he left Forks, so many months ago. Without Bella, he found music pointless. Instead of hearing the perfect harmonies and beautiful melodies that Bella inspired, Edward could only feel the pain and sadness in each note; loss and heartbreak. He tried to avoid music as much as he could.

He shifted his eyes back to his family, scattered about the formal living room. After his meeting with Jacob Black, he had returned quickly to the Cullen house, where his family was waiting anxiously for him. Alice hadn't seen any of it; she was frustrated to discover that werewolves somehow blocked her powers. She had been keeping an "eye" on Edward when, much to her annoyance, his future had suddenly disappeared. Edward had quickly filled his family in on what he had learned from Jacob and what he was thinking.

He had prepared himself for more of their pity, but surprisingly, they had agreed that his theory was plausible. That was all he needed.

"Interesting theory, Edward." Spoke Jasper, breaking the silence. "But how are we going to find her?" he wondered, his mind quickly considering and then turning down ideas as they surfaced.

"I don't yet know. That's where I thought you all could help," admitted Edward, "and no." Edward glared at Jasper as a particular "idea" buzzed through his head. Jasper shrugged, looking slightly guilty.

"Let me get this straight," said Rosalie quickly. "Laurant came back and found Bella in the forest. He was going to kill her for Victoria? But a pack of wolves—Jacob Black and his little friends—found her at the right second and tore him up?"

Edward nodded impatiently. That part wasn't in question.

"And after that," continued Jasper thoughtfully, "you think that Victoria came for Bella herself? Is that why Bella jumped from the cliff, you think?"

"No. I think Bella jumped off the cliff because she was trying to live dangerously, for some reason," replied Edward grimly. He'd seen inside Jacob's head long enough to know that the two of them had been engaging in a few dangerous choice activities. Like motorcycle riding. _And hand holding_. Edward shook that one away quickly.

"When Bella walks, it's dangerously," snickered Emmett. Edward shot him a scowl and turned back to his family.

"You think Victoria found her in the water," stated Carlisle, nodding.

"Yes," answered Edward, his eyes trained on his father.

_Possible. But that doesn't mean Bella is still alive, son. Especially considering what we did to James._

"I'd feel it, if she were dead. I know I would," Edward clung to that idea.

Esme and Carlisle exchanged glances.

"Let's say Victoria didn't kill her. What would she do with her? Change her? Then what? And why didn't I see any of this?" asked Alice…more to herself than to her family. She had been struggling for a vision all day, to no avail. She was frustrated.

"You weren't used to staying in tune with Bella these past few months. You just didn't see it," suggested Jasper, taking his frustrated mate's hand and squeezing it gently, his eyes soft.

Edward stared out the living room window and into the dark forest beyond the isolated Cullen house.

"Then Bella is a vampire out there somewhere?" asked Emmett incredulously. "She wouldn't survive a day..." Rosalie had the grace to cut off his horrified realization with a jab to the ribs. Edward's scowl deepened, picturing his Bella for the first time as a newborn. Uncontrolled, hungry, eyes full of blazing red power—dangerous.

"We've got to find her," whispered Alice, feeling panic set in. "Or Victoria. But how?" She glanced at Jasper helplessly; but he was lost deep in his own thoughts.

"If this is the case, I'm surprised that Victoria hasn't contacted us—to tell what she's done," spoke Carlisle, leaning back against the wall.

"Me too. Unless, of course, Bella managed to over-power her and kill…" Jasper mussed.

"Bella? Kill? Ha! Maybe the ant that couldn't get out of the way fast enough when she tripped." Emmett laughed dryly. Alice swatted him across the arm—but realized quickly that he wasn't cracking a joke this time. He was truly worried about Bella.

"She would be a new born. It could happen," Alice glared at Emmett.

"But we know Bella. If she were of her own free will, wouldn't she come back to Forks? She would want to see Charlie. And, by the sounds of it, Jacob," Jasper glanced sideways at Edward as he delivered the last line. Edward grimaced, but didn't answer.

"Maybe she woke-up without memories?" suggested Alice, whose own horrifying experience had happened that way.

"Maybe she's scared she wouldn't be able to control herself," Esme spoke up quietly.

Edward growled softly thinking how scared and alone she probably was right at that very second.

"Maybe Victoria's got a more intricate plan up her sleeve," spoke Jasper slowly. Edward pale skin turned an even more deathly shade of white. The Cullen's fell silent, thinking, wondering.

"If she's hurt her, I swear I'm going to…" Edward trailed off, his eyes blazing.

"In the end, though, we don't know that any of this happened. Bella could have drowned. Sharks could have torn up her body. And Victoria could be far, far from here. Everything really could be as it naturally should," spoke Rosalie, flipping back a lock of golden hair.

"There's nothing natural about getting eaten by sharks, Rose," warned Jasper.

"Or bears," added Emmett, attempting to keep a straight face. Rosalie glanced at Emmett, anger in her golden eyes. But after taking one look at his innocent expression, she cracked a small smile.

"Let's go with Edwards's theory. Victoria somehow got to Bella. We'll need to find Victoria to find Bella," spoke Calisle.

Edward's eyes snapped to his father's face, thanking him with a look. Though he had been almost positive that Carlisle would support him, he found he felt relieved nonetheless. Jaspers words had rattled him. _A more inticate plan_.

"Alright. It's time to make our own plan," spoke Jasper quietly, his voice full of years of strategic expertise.

"And it better involve ripping off Victoria's head," Emmett added sternly, mimicking Jasper's tone

This time, it was Rosalie that hit Emmett.

Alice grinned, her face smug.

"Well, at least my one vision of the day was right. It's a start."

* * *

**Thanks again to everyone who has been reading and reviewing--also, I've gone back and changed the end of chapter four a tiny bit (the scene with J and E) because a reviewer pointed out a bit of a plot hole (thank you!) Please keep letting me know what you like/dislike about my story!**


	7. Chapter 7 Crash

**Chapter Seven Crash**

* * *

He watched her as she slept. Her eyelids moved around rapidly, as though she were dreaming. And yet, how could she be dreaming--he had been told she was the same as him; he had been warned. And yet he knew his kind could not sleep; could never dream. Who exactly was she and why was he sent to…look after her?

* * *

Bella groaned softly and rubbed her closed eyes, slowly turning from her back, to her side. Suddenly, she tensed but kept her eyes closed. She was close to something warm, something bright. Quickly, her mind worked backwards, replaying her last memories. There was the deer, and the blood—Bella shuttered inwardly—and the dizziness. _I passed out_. Her ears strained to pick up the noises around her. Crackling firewood..._fire, that's the light and sound_. She struggled to pickup anything else. There it was: movement, slight shifting of body weight.

She wasn't alone.

Bella's eyes flew open and she jumped quickly to her feet, ignoring the light-headed feeling that met her mind.

She crouched low, her eyes focused on the man sitting across the clearing from her. He pulled his eyes from the crackling fire centered in the middle of the clearing and met her stare. His eyes, a deep onyx, opened wide in surprise and he jumped to his feet.

Bella prepared to run. Her whole body told her to go and to go quickly, no questions asked, no looking back. But he spoke before she could make the decision.

"Don't go. Please. I'm a friend."

Bella's realized her face must have spelled out her doubt because he quickly clarified.

"I know what you are—I'm a vampire too. I'm not here to hurt you," he added, holding out his hands, palms up, as if showing her he wasn't dangerous.

Bella remained tense, but didn't move, her shock was apparent and the man chuckled quietly. Indecisiveness clouded her fuzzy brain. He definitely didn't smell human.

"My name is Chase," he said quickly. "I found you here, unconscious. I thought you were human for a minute, but noticed the deer. And, well, your skin and—eyes." He added, glancing into her eyes again as if to make sure of something. Bella noticed he looked utterly confused.

Bella felt her body relax slightly as he sat down again, across the clearing. The need to run away slowly left her. _He is one of them—one of us. _Something in that thought jolted Bella into speech.

"You—you're the same," She muttered, more to herself. The man--Chase--nodded. "What are you doing out here?" she asked randomely.

"This is my home," he laughed, his arms sweeping grandly. "I live in these woods. I've lived here for many years. The question of the hour is: what are you doing out here? You're not…from around here," he stated.

Bella felt her muscles tense again. How could she even start to answer that one?

"You're new, aren't you?" he spoke, his eyes curious. "But your eyes aren't red. And you seem—experienced, controlled. You confuse me. You killed a—deer," he glanced off into the darkness, shook his head in amusement, and then turned back to Bella. "But I swear you were sleeping…dreaming, just moments ago. What are you?"

Bella shivered as she listened to this stranger—this vampire--describe her; put her into context. She had known there was something—different about Vampire Bella since the moment she opened her eyes and didn't feel the carnal blood lust she had heard so much about from the Cullen's. Her aversion to blood surprisingly rivaled that of Human Bellas; she hadn't like the small of it then, either. And yet, as Bella unconsciously flexed her muscles, she felt better, stronger, than she had hours before.

"I don't know," whispered Bella, her arms wrapping themselves around her body.

"What happened to you?" Chase whispered his eyes wide.

Bella crouched down, her eyes on the vampire across from her. A piece of hair escaped from her pony tail and she brushed it back impatiently.

"I don't really know that, either. I was changed. A week ago."

"One week? How much have you eaten?" Bella saw the shock in his eyes.

"Nothing. Well, I drank from that deer over there. But the blood made me—dizzy." Bella watched the male vampires face change from shocked to surprised.

"What made you kill the deer and not a human?" he question—his tone conveying a carefully controlled mild curiosity.

"I just—don't want to kill humans," replied Bella, looking down at her pale hands.

Chase laughed.

"Newborns can't choose that." He sounded accusatory to Bella's ears. She shrugged, silent.

" You are the most fascinating newborn I have ever met." He said, truthfully, as his mind worked to process what he knew of this girl. Something was bothering him. Something he'd learned so many years ago…

Bella smiled a tiny smile.

"Where are we?" she finally asked.

"Canada. Not far from the Washington border." Chase watched closely as her expression changed from curious to—something else…_anguish_, he realized. _Of course_.

"Where do you come from?" he asked carefully.

Bella looked up at him, her eyes still full of uncontained pain.

"Washington." She whispered.

"Why did you come up here to Canada?" he pressed.

"I—well, I'm not sure. I was brought here, I guess. By the one who changed me."

Chase noted the fear in her voice.

"It's a scary process." He sympathized, skirting around the subject. "Most don't live through it."

Bella looked up at him again, curious.

"What happened to you? How long have you been...?"

"A vampire? It's been a few years. I was changed in the late 1920's. I was never meant to become what we are. But I was bitten in a crazy rage and was left for dead. I managed to lock myself in the hotel had been staying at. The pain had been excruciating, as you probably remember", Bella shook her head, and Chase continued, "And when I changed, I had plenty of food near-by." Chase cringed, as he remembered the brutality he had used to kill his meals in those early days. "I've been living in different parts of the country ever since. I find these parts are easier. Remote, rainy and plenty of "lost" hikers."

Bella's eyes widened, but she said nothing.

"You're going to have to kill you know, to stay alive. Deer will only get you so far."

"I know vampires that can-" Bella began to argue but cut herself off. She wasn't sure she wanted him to know about the Cullen's.

"That can what?" he asked.

"That can survive only on animals." She finished quickly. Chase snorted.

"They're weak. Human blood is the only way we can reach our full potential."

Bella knew to stay quiet this time.

"But you say the animal blood made you feel dizzy?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Shall we go find you a human then? Animal blood is so sub-par. It's like settling for a 5 dollar steak when what you truly need is the prime 100 dollar stuff."

"No." replied Bella quickly.

Chase stared at the girl in front of him.

"Honestly," she said quickly, "A real steak doesn't sound so bad. Or some cooked deer."

"_Human_ food?" laughed Chase. He stopped quickly when he saw that she was serious. The feeling that had been hounding him since he saw her eyes grew stronger. The niggling feeling came back. There had been stories, years ago…

"Fine. Let's do it. But when you choke on a mouth full of cooked deer sawdust…please let me help you find some real food."

Bella shrugged.

_Something about me is different_.

She just wasn't sure that was a good thing.

* * *

Bella wasn't sure why she trusted this stranger, this vampire. Perhaps it was because she left lonely and scared. Perhaps because he was like her, like the Cullen's.

_Well, not exactly like me_, she corrected, chewing a bite of deer venison thoughtfully. Food had never tasted so good to her. She could feel the nourishment travelling through her body. She felt stronger, more capable.

"This is just weird," Chase muttered from near-by, his face twisted in disgust, watching as Bella finished off a chunk of meat.

"Don't knock it till you try it," replied Bella, holding out her next piece. Chase pretended to gag and shook his head.

"I'll be back. I'm going to go eat what vampires were meant to eat," he said.

"No. Now? A hiker?' questioned Bella, suddenly standing up.

"I don't have time for that. A deer, bear. Whatever's close," he replied, "Be back," he repeated.

Bella crouched back down, popping another piece of cooked meat into her mouth, contemplating her new knowledge.

_Okay. So the smell of blood makes me want to dry heave. The taste made me pass out. But how did I feel when I woke up?_ Bella had felt fine; better than fine, strong. And yet, she was still attracted to food, human food. It tasted better than she had ever remembered. But how could that be? Edward had made it very clear how vampires felt about human food; "_If someone dared you to eat dirt, you could, couldn't you?"_

Bella squeezed her eyes shut; trying to block out the velvety voice that threatened to open the void in her chest and focus on her task at hand. He had made it very clear that human food was disgusting, but could be consumed, if need be. _So why do I find it so delicious? _And w_hy can I walk into a bar and not turn the place into a bloody all-you-can-eat smorgasbord?_ Bella stretched her arms and legs out. She felt just as strong as she did when she woke from the deer blood. _They seem to have the same effect on me and yet…why—_

Bella's ears prickled to attention at the sound of talking. Not close, but she could hear someone. She stood quietly and strained. Chase? She wondered. His voice. But who was he talking to? As quickly as the talking had started, it stopped. Bella suddenly felt wary. What _am I doing here? I need to leave. _

Bella glanced around the small clearing and spotted a backpack. She quickly pulled it open, scrambling to find something…who didn't carry a cell phone these days?

"What are you doing?" growled a voice behind her. Bella whirled around, her eyes focusing quickly on Chase.

"Wondering if you had a cell phone?" she heard herself ask.

"And why would you need one of those?" he sneered, "Everyone you know thinks you're dead."

Bella felt her eyes widen in surprise, her mouth drop.

"Wha-how do you-who are you?"

Chase shrugged, the threat in his eyes disappearing.

"I'm just assuming. What else would they think? It's probably been long enough. Probably have declared you dead," he said, flicking a smile her way. Bella felt beyond confused. Something was not right with Chase.

"Hey," he threw at her, sounding suddenly curious, "Who did you say changed you?"

Bella stared at the vampire. He gazed back at her, his eyes bright.

"I didn't. I don't know," she replied quickly. She was done telling him anything about her.

"Really? Cause here's the deal. I know who it was. And she's really pissed off right now. She's even more pissed off at me, cause I haven't really been holding up to my end of the—deal."

Chase took a step towards her and Bella took a step back, shock written all over her face.

"Deal?" she whispered.

"Yeah. I've got something she needs. And she's got," he paused and glared darkly into the woods, "something I need."

Bella turned and took off, her legs pumping wildly. But instead of feeling the forest wiz by her, she felt herself crash into the trunk of a near-by tree. She struggled to move away, but found she couldn't move a muscle. Try as she might, her body was completely pinned to the trunk of a huge pine tree.

"I thought I'd be able to do this without having to use violence. But when I saw your eyes, your control…you haven't figured it out yet, Bella dear, but you will. And I can't risk that happening while you're with me."

Bella started at the vampire in front of her. _How does he know my name? I never told him my name. Victoria, _she realized_. She's not done with me. How could I have even been trusting of this man? _Bella mentally screamed at herself for being so stupid…so _human._

"What have you done to me?" she whispered, trying to pull her hands away from the trunk, unsuccessfully.

"The Cullen's may be the only vampires around here to be veggies. But they're not the only ones that can…do things," replied Chase softly, advancing, his eyes intent on Bella.

"You know the Cullen's?" she wasn't sure why this surprised her, exactly.

"Only one, personally," he chuckled quietly, darkly, as if at an inside joke.

Dread took the place of fear in Bella's stomach. Something was more than a little not right. And as she started at the vampire in front of her, the vampire that could pin her to a tree and keep her there without moving or touching her, she was sure she everything was about to come crashing down.

* * *

**A/N: I apologize for the delay in chapter posting. I'm in the middle of a semester of summer school (ughhh!) and have exams all over the place. This week is a slower one, so more time to write and post..yay!**

**I'm a little nervous about introducing a new character into the story--I know how readers feel about "random" new characters. Bare with me! And, as always, please please please review and let me know what you think :D**


	8. Chapter 8 Into the Dark

Chapter Eight Into the Dark

* * *

It was 2am.

The Cullen's had retreated to separate parts of the house after hours of unsuccessful planning. Unsuccessful because none of them felt satisfied with any of the ideas that had been put forth. They knew that in order to play with someone like Victoria, they would need a greater plan than what they'd been coming up with. Better yet, they would need to change the rules.

Jasper found himself on a beige leather couch in Alice's room listening to music through a pair of head-phones. His eyes were closed in thought, as Alice sorted through some of her old pictures on the floor beside him.

His eyes suddenly flew open as he sensed a total change in emotion coming from Alice. She had been feeling anxious and frustrated and despite all of his encouraging, she did not want him to help her feel better.

"It'll keep me focused," she had argued.

But suddenly, those feelings were completely erased by something different: by feelings of excitement, fear, anticipation.

"Alice, what is it?" spoke Jasper quietly, pulling off the headphones and dumping his iPod on the carpet as he sat up, alert, tense. Ready.

"I saw her," whispered Alice, jumping to her feet, her photos flying everywhere.

"Bella?" asked Jasper eagerly, jumping up as well, his arm finding it's way to her tiny waist.

Alice shook her head.

"Victoria. We need to find Edward," she said quickly. "She's close," she added. "I can feel it. Edward!" she yelled, adding a quieter plea in her head, _Edward, where are you?_

"Alice," spoke Edward from the bedroom door as he listened to her vision. He nodded grimly. "She's looking for us. For me," he said.

"Where?" asked Jasper, pulling on his shoes. Alice put out her hand.

"He has to go alone," she whispered as Edward nodded, knowing it was the only way.

Jasper glanced warily at Emmett as he barreled down the hall towards the threesome. Rosalie, Carlisle and Esme followed close behind.

"Alice?" asked Carlisle quietly.

"She's outside of Forks. Waiting for Edward. She's nervous," replied Alice, nodding, confirming her own thoughts.

"To the bat mobile!" shouted Emmett, turning back and heading towards the stairs, "Man, I have always wanted to say that. Cause, you know, we're vampires," he called behind him to the rest of his family.

Jasper looked at Edward, who was quickly pulling on a long black coat.

"I have to go alone, Emmett," he spoke, impatiently pushing back a lock of hair as he pulled on a black baseball hat.

"What?" bellowed Emmett from the stairs, turning back to face his family "Hell no!"

"Or it won't happen. She won't show herself. She knows what we'll do," said Alice grimly. Edward didn't like that. He grabbed his cell phone and descended the stairs, pushing past a sulking Emmett.

"What has _she_ done, is the question," stated Jasper as the Cullen's followed Edward down the stairs.

"I'm going to find out. Alice, keep watching. Let me know if you see anything else," Edward turned and in half a second was out the front door, his black frame already just a shadow in the night.

"Edward. Call us. The second you can," called Esme, knowing he was still well within hearing distance.

"We'll be close," reminded Carlisle.

"This suuuucks," pouted Emmett.

* * *

Edward didn't care that he didn't have a plan. He didn't even care that he knew that Victoria would have a plan. All he cared about was seeing his Bella. Seeing her safe and holding her in his arms again. He longed to feel her skin, touch her hair, trace her smile with his finger. It had been so long, so long. Of course, he knew better than to assume that was what she wanted anymore. She had Jacob. Edward pushed those thoughts back to that dusty corner in the back of his mind and switched gears. All that mattered right now was finding Bella. The rest would play out later.

Edward was close to where Alice had seen Victoria in her vision. He stopped and crouched low, his mind open, listening.

_She had to have seen me. That's what she does, isn't it?_

Edward breathed, a small smile playing bitterly on his lips. He spotted her, close to a thicket of high bushes, on the verge on the deep forest. Edward closed the gap quickly, surprising Victoria as he went to grab her. He so badly wanted to rip her pretty red-haired head from her body. But she was quick, functioning on built up adrenaline and nerves.

"Well hello there, Edward," she purred from a few feet into the forest, "I was hoping we could play nice for awhile."

Edward checked his control and smoothed his face out into a mask of calm. He needed to stay in control.

_Bella,_ his mind screamed her name. He shook his head. _Control._

"Victoria. You wanted to meet with me?" he spoke, choosing his words carefully.

" Oh Edward Cullen. I just wanted to know how you're dealing with the death of your mate," she spoke, her eyes wide with innocence.

Edward fought to control his anger.

"What have you done with Bella?" he asked, his voice calm, level.

"I killed her," replied Victoria easily, shrugging her shoulders. "Mate for mate," she continued, her voice suddenly changing. "You took my James from me. What did you expect, Edward?"

"She's still alive," Edward insisted, his pain growing as he stood there.

"Is she, Cullen? How exactly are we defining alive? Are you alive? Am I?"

"You changed her," his voice was quiet, dead. He waited to see Victoria's thoughts, he waited to see Bella as she was changed by the red-haired monster. But he saw nothing.

"Where is she?" he demanded, scanning her thoughts.

Victoria laughed, diabolically, loving every second.

"You can't see, can you? You can't see where she is?"

Edward kept trying. Nothing. _Why can't I see anything? How had she blocked her thoughts of Bella?_

"Her heart isn't beating anymore, Cullen. She's nowhere close. And she certainly isn't safe. But aside from that, there's something—different—about your girl, Cullen. Maybe I'm starting to see why you kept her as a pet," Victoria snarled out the last line, her expression amused as she watched Edward's stone face.

"What do you want? What do you want from me?"

_I want to see the pain I feel every day. I want you to hurt like I do. I want you to know how it feels to lose everything. And to know that you'll never get it back._

"She's trapped, Cullen. She's somewhere darker than death. She's somewhere neither of us will ever be and she doesn't even know it yet," Victoria laughed, as though having made a joke. Her red hair burned like fire. Edward felt his control melting away. He felt grief, frustration and anger. Mainly, he felt the un-deniable urge to kill Victoria.

"You want to see her?" she asked, her voice smooth again.

Edward un-curled his fists. Took a breath.

"Where is she?"

"Follow me, Edward Cullen. But don't say I didn't warn you."

Without a second's hesitation, Edward took off after Victoria into the dark trees, his black coat breezing behind him.

Somewhere in the distance, a wolf howled a long, haunted song.

* * *

**A/N: Gah. I've bee avoiding the on-line world for the last week or so, not wanting to stumble upon anything BD related. Now that I have finished the book, I find it's safe to be on-line again.**

**My BD reading experience has left me feeling a little strange and un-settled...for many reasons but I'm hoping my own fanfic story doesn't lose it's direction (and, yes! it has one, I promise!) because of how I feel. As always, please keep up the feed-back--it's always very appreicated :)**


	9. Chapter 9 I Will Follow You

* * *

Chapter Nine I Will follow You

* * *

Everything had happened so quickly.

One second, she had been pinned to the tree, with Chase fast approaching. The next second, she was running.

She didn't turn to look back. She kept running. It was almost dawn now. The sun kissed the horizon.

Bella kept running.

* * *

Chase suffered only a very small feeling of frustration when his prisoner suddenly took off.

_I should have known_, he mentally kicked himself for thinking he'd be able to hold her for very long. _She's on the way to strength and knowledge._ _Hopefully the girl doesn't hold grudges._ Chase shrugged and turned his body south. Bella was only an afterthought. He really didn't care what happened to her. He was waiting for his prize. It would be only a matter of time, now.

* * *

Edward knew his family had not followed. He assumed it was because Alice had seen something, something warning them away. His cell phone had been vibrating madly in his pocket, but with Victoria behind him watching his every move very carefully, he knew it wasn't the right time to check his voice mail messages.

They were close. Victoria had slowed down her directions from behind. Edward grew more anxious by the minute. _How close am I to my Bella?_ Every fibre of his body ached for Bella. To see her, to see her alive. No matter what kind of alive that meant. Edward closed his eyes briefly, a surge of anger slicing through his calm facade. Victoria would pay for any harm she'd inflicted on his Bella. She would pay dearly.

"Ah. Well here we are," she said finally. Edward grew alert, his eyes picking up on movement several yards ahead of them.

"Chase?" she called out.

"Victoria. You made it," responded a voice, smoothly. Edward still couldn't see anyone.

"And I brought you a—friend," she replied with a giggle as they approached a clearing. Edwards's eyes zeroed in on the source of speech: a young man wearing dirty hiking clothes, his thoughts reflecting around Victoria.

"Where is she?" demanded Victoria before Edward could even get the words out of his mouth. They both glanced around the clearing quickly. Edward couldn't smell her. There was not even a hint that she had ever been there. At least, not Human Bella.

"Interesting that you should ask, Victoria," he responded, his eyes on the red-haired vampire. Suddenly, Edward found himself flying through the air. He hit something hard—a tree?—and found himself unable to move. With a glance up, he saw Victoria was in a similar position; back to a tree, pinned.

"What…Chase, what is this?" she demanded, her voice fierce.

"It seems our little Bella got away," he replied, smoothly, unconcerned.

"What do you mean—she got away?"

"She ran. I didn't follow," he replied, amused by Victoria's expression.

"How did she run away? This is why I asked you to do the job! People don't run away from you! We had a deal, Chase. You hold her here. And I bring you Edward Cullen," Edward's eyes flicked up to the vampire—Chase—in front of him, surprised. Chase turned to examine Edward, his eyes dark. Dangerous.

"Your face is seared into my memory forever. I only caught a glimpse. And it was so dark. There was so much pain. But I knew I'd recognize you anywhere," he mused, his eyes on Edwards face, nodding as though confirming something to himself.

Edward tried to pull his arm from the tree, to no avail.

"I don't know you," he responded, his mind carefully examining Chase's thoughts.

"Not specifically, no. I was just one among many that night, Cullen. Or maybe I should call you Mason," he sneered.

And then Edward heard it. He heard it all.

There he was, he Edward, unrecognizable from who he was now. Blood lust in his eyes, blood smeared all over his mouth, his hands. Screams coming from all around him, screams of terror.

Edward shook his head slowly. But he couldn't find his voice.

"Oh yes, Edward Mason. That was you. 1929. I was heading back to my hotel from a night of dancing with my—my fiancé. And there you were. I thought you were injured. There was blood everywhere. I asked if you needed help, I was ready to call a doctor. You just shook your head and came at me," Edward heard the thoughts of fear and pain as Chase remembered the way Edward had attacked him. "You weren't gentle. You left me to die on the street. I thought I was dead. I almost was. But then I started to feel something…something else take over. I managed to drag myself into my hotel room. I hid there for days. Until the lust was too much. I started killing patrons. Draining them. I was so hungry and it hurt so much."

Edward closed his eyes, his jaw tight. He lowered his head.

"Listen to me!" screamed Chase, grabbing Edward face and holding it roughly between his cold hands. Edward opened his eyes and stared into the two pools of dark pain.

"I couldn't control myself. God, I didn't want to! But I couldn't stop. When my fiancé came to see me after I didn't show up to her parent's house, I killed her. I drained her dry. After I realized what I'd done, I thought maybe she would be re-born again, too. I waited and waited. But she was so still…so white. Dead. You did this to me, Mason. You condemned me to a life of hell and now you're going to have to pay," he whispered, ignoring the shouts coming from Victoria.

Edward squared his shoulders and looked Chase straight in the eye.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I'm sorry that happened. I didn't think—when I went through those few years—I didn't think anyone had survived—had changed…I would never have-"

"Never have what, Mason? Never have killed any of us?"

"I would have made sure," he replied, his gaze level.

Chase snorted. "But then, I would never have been able to watch you while I did this." And half a second later, Edward felt something dig into his cold, marble skin. Chase pulled back a silver knife, dripping with crimson blood. His blood?

"Sure, I know it doesn't hurt now. Not yet. But it will. I'll save dismembering your head for last," Chase laughed, a crazed, hungry noise that filled the night, echoing off the trees.

* * *

Bella knew something was wrong.

_Well, what hasn't been wrong in the last few hours?_ But there was something else and as she slowed to a walk, she allowed her mind to work properly. She was pretty sure Chase had not followed her. She was also pretty sure Victoria was on her way to meet Chase. Something about having a deal. Keeping her "hostage" had been his part of the deal. So what was he getting in return?

_Think, Bella…think_. She went over the past couple hours, racking her brain for clues. He knew the Cullen's. He knew _one_ of the Cullen's.

Bella felt her stomach sink. _He_ _wanted revenge. _She thought of the dark look he'd given when he'd mentioned the Cullen's._ But why? And who? Which Cullen?_

She knew whatever was going on, she would have to go back. But she would have to do it carefully.

Bella turned herself around and started jogging in the direction she had just come from, her brain working furiously.

* * *

**Sorry 'bout the cliffhangers! I can't help myself...:) Next time I post, Bella and Edward will finally see one another again :)**

**You guys are awesome, thanks for following my story!**


	10. Time Stands Still

**Time Stands Still (a glimpse inside Edward's mind)**

* * *

I'm struggling—fiercely--but I can't move. Perhaps the struggle is more mental than anything else. I know he has the right and yet it's not time to go. Not yet; not like this. This cannot be my final act. Not without my Bella.

He's staring at me, his face full of a dark glee. The joy he seems to be getting out of this is un-real. I almost feel bad that I have no recollection of this man, this boy—he had been only one of many during those years. Would things be different had I flashed a look of recognition? Perhaps it would have made him feel less of a need to slice out hunks of my cold flesh.

Flesh that was now at my feet.

I ignored the pain and tuned out the world, closed my eyes. Thought of Bella. There couldn't exist pain when Bella filled my mind. I must have smiled because suddenly, I felt the knife pressed on my cheek. His voice cut into my thoughts and I cringed.

I opened my eyes again with a sigh. If these really were to be my last few moments alive, I was not happy about spending them looking at this Chase character. I glanced over at Victoria to see why she was suddenly so quiet. As my eyes went to find her, a small movement from the tree branches outside the clearing caught my attention. I narrowed my eyes slightly, focusing. Someone was up there. In the tree. She was well hidden, but I caught the unmistakable outline of a small pair of legs. Alice? Esme? I breathed the air, quickly, subtly, looking for a familiar scent. Nothing.

"How you feeling, Mason?" sneered Chase from in front of me. He had backed away slightly, taking his knife with him. But I knew better than to relax. He had big plans for me yet. Truthfully though, I was starting to feel a little—off. I wasn't sure if that had to do with the small pieces of flesh at my feet or the fact that someone was hiding, up in that tree.

I tried to keep my eyes from the gigantic spruce. Instead, I struggled once more but I was still very firmly bound to the trunk behind me.

"Tell me about your powers, Chase," I commented. Suddenly, I felt like I needed to desperately stall my demise.

"Easy, Mason. I was strong in my human life. I fought, for a living. Kind of like those WWF guys today, but much, much more real. I always could find people's weak points and win a match. Never lost, matter of fact. I've only heard of a few vampires whose human traits transfer over. I happen to be one of those lucky ones. Never had to worry about a victim escaping," sneered Chase, wiping his blade across his shirt.

"Except Bella Swan, you imbecile!" yelled Victoria from her tree prison across the clearing. I watched as Chase's face transformed from satisfaction to doubt.

"Bella Swan is more powerful than many of us," he responded. I perked up. But I knew better than to ask questions. As soon as he knew I wanted information, he would use it against me. Or Bella, whenever she—I interrupted my own train of thought with an insane idea. As Victoria threw more insults at Chase, I snuck another glance up.

And there she was.

_Bella! _

Had I a heart, it would have stopped. She stared back at me from the tree, her perfect mouth, slightly open in what--surprise? Wonder? I wasn't sure. I took her in, eagerly. She was Bella—but there was something else—she appeared stronger, wilder—more guarded? There was the proof that she'd been changed…physically, she'd turned into one of us. Flawlessly beautiful, skin milky white. I ached for her. I ached to touch her, to feel her. To comfort her.To make sure she was real. Was she real? Could I be hallucinating?

Her eyes.

I had saved them for last, both fearing and anticipating what they would tell me. But I had to know if she was real. Silently thanking Victoria for her sudden need to threaten Chase's existence, I slowly and carefully pulled my gaze upwards. I found her eyes. They were glued to my own face, they met my own eyes with a look I couldn't quite place.

My eyes widened in surprise at what greeted me. The soft, warm brown eyes I knew and loved started back at me. But—where was the red blood filled eyes of a newborn? Did that mean she wasn't real, after all? Her expression turned pained and she blinked her gaze away.

No!

What does she see in my face? What is she thinking? What could I possibly look like to her—cut up –weak, restrained.

I thrashed in my prison_. Bella!_ Screamed my mind. She was so close. The pain was so intense. I could feel myself giving into the deep cuts in my flesh. Pain was over-taking my every sense.

"What are you suddenly so agitated for?" asked Chase, his tone sounding less eager and now, just plain annoyed. He turned back to me, his eyes viscous. He was ready to make the kill.

"I'm done with you, Mason. I didn't realize you gave such a damn about this Bella. She certainly did prove to be interesting. I think I might have to find her after I cut off your head. Maybe she'd be interested in teaming up—with our powers together, we'd be un-stoppable. Such a beautiful girl," he added. I growled low in my throat.

I watched helplessly as he closed the gap, his knife discarded and his teeth bared. He was poised to kill. I turned my gaze to Bella's tree.

One last look.

I barely saw her jump from the tree and land softly on the ground only feet away. It was so quiet. And everything was so…

_(dark)_

* * *

"Run! Edward…go!" screamed a voice. Edward jerked himself up from where he had fallen, his head foggy, his limbs limp.

But he was free, free from Chase's invisible restraints.

_Bella?_

"Edward, run!" and he saw her then. She faced Chase and Victoria, her hands held forward, palms towards the two vampires, as though holding them back. They snapped in her direction, strained against some invisible force.

"Bella..!" he croaked, his throat dry. What was wrong with him?

"I'm right behind you!" she called back.

But Edward knew he couldn't leave her. Gathering all of his energy, he ran at Bella, grabbed an outstretched hand and pulled her from the clearing.

They ran.

And--they were followed.

Too close.

Edward chanced a glance at Bella, hoping he could stay strong against her very presence. Now was not the time to re-unite. To spill everything he was feeling. To gather her in his arms and not let go. Not yet. He tried not to take in her beautiful face, tried to ignore the pain etched in her face and the fear that haunted her eyes. Instead, he focused on the presence of her hand in his. So different than before, but so—electrifying. Despite his present condition, Edward had never felt more alive, more _warm. _

"Bella, we're going to have to separate. I'll lead them away. They won't be able to catch up to me. You keep going South. We're maybe a few hours from my parent's house outside of Forks. They are all waiting. Go there. You'll be safe, don't stop anywhere else," his voice broke. He risked another glance at Bella. She stared back; the depth of pain on her face was torture to him.

"Please, Bella. Please," he whispered fiercely. She gave one swift nod.

That was all he needed.

"I will see you there. Soon. Take this! Don't let anyone see you," he slipped off his long black coat and handed it to her. She clutched it to her body with her free hand.

"Now go. You'll be safe," he said softly.

"Run fast, Edward," she whispered. And Edward felt her hand slip from his as she adjusted her direction.

Edward ran, his empty hand tingling.

* * *

**A/N: Just playing around with the voices. Hope it wasn't too weird. I wanted us to see what Edward sees when he spots Bella again after all this time. Not sure how well I got into his head, but it was interesting. Note that I switched back to third person after all went dark.**

**Please keep reading and reviewing :)**


	11. Chapter 10 A Place Where I Belong?

**Chapter Eleven The Place where I Belong?**

* * *

Bella slowed to a walk as her new powerful senses picked up the fast approaching Cullen house. She was almost there. Exhausted, but almost home free. Home…

And yet, she wasn't ready.

She felt so many emotions churning around in her mind, so many feelings sending her different messages. She stopped, glancing quickly behind her. She knew they weren't following, at least not yet, but she kept hoping that Edward would appear, grinning behind her.

She had been trying hard not to think of him since they'd parted ways, taking Victoria and Chase with him.

But she couldn't help it.

A soft groan escaped from her lips as she allowed the memory of him wash over her. She had been shocked when she'd spotted him from her hiding place in the spruce tree. Victoria, Chase and _Edward._ And then he had seen her. When their eyes had locked, Bella had seen so many emotions in his face, in his eyes. But he had stopped with shock—revulsion? It certainly had not been happiness.

She wasn't Bella to him anymore. She was something else, something different. A monster?

And yet, his hand in hers had felt so right. She had not wanted to leave him. She wanted to throw her arms around his shoulders—to touch his face again.

Her hand still tingled were his flesh had touched her.

Bella shook the thoughts from her head and focused again on the house in the distance. _Why hasn't Alice seen me yet?_ She wondered to herself. But Bella had a very good idea why. The same reason why Chase had not been able to hold her to that tree.

_What am I?_

Bella pulled her arms tightly around her body, leaning her head low to breath in the scent of Edwards coat—the coat that now enveloped her, wrapping her in Edwards intoxicating aroma. That was something that had not changed—in fact, it had gotten much, much stronger. More distinct. Like she could pick his scent out of a line-up of hundreds.

What worried her was that she couldn't detect his scent from the near-by house. She knew he was fast. When he had said they needed to split up, that Victoria and Chase would follow him, she hadn't given the idea much thought; she'd been frightened, not able to think properly. Edward was faster than any vampire she'd seen. But she had forgotten in those precious moments, that he was hurt. Seriously hurt.

She closed her eyes against the image of the sadistic Chase cutting out small pieces of Edwards's skin. It had taken everything she'd had not to give herself away when she'd seen what kind of shape he was in. It had scared her. Never once had she seen Edward in such obvious pain, so weak…so un-able to fight back! Would he still be able to out-run them? Should she go back? Bella glanced warily at the Cullen house in the distance. She was so close…and they could help.

She started to walk again, hesitantly. What would they think, seeing her on their doorstep after all this time? They had left her too, so many months ago. Not even a goodbye from Alice, whom she'd grown close to. They just left.

She couldn't help but wonder why exactly they were back. The story had been that they'd moved to LA. Of course, Bella hadn't really believed that, it was far too sunny there for the Cullen's. When had they come back? And were they there to stay? She shivered at her thoughts; wondering about the Cullen's future, yet having no idea about her own.

_What am I coming back to? What has happened to Bella Swan?_ But she had to stop herself there. She couldn't deal with of that just yet.

_One thing at a time._

Close, she was close now.

She could hear snippets of conversation coming from the house.

"Why can't I _see_ anything?"

"…soon."

"…out of control newborn. I wish she…"

"…Edward's okay…he's on his way home—"

Bella paused on the outskirts of the woods, smiling in relief. Edward was on his way back. Her smile disappeared. She wasn't ready to face them, not yet. She paced back a few steps, in case one of them looked out the window_. Maybe I should rest first. Figure out what I'm going to say to them_…She knew she was being cowardly, but she wasn't sure she could face them. Exhaustion hit her like a ton of bricks. Bella paced back further into the woods, scanning quickly for somewhere to hide. She found a small dark cave and squeezed her small frame inside_. _

_I'll just close my eyes for a second…_

* * *

"I thought—I thought for sure she would come back—" Edward said softly, as his family looked away from his crest-fallen face. He had banged into the house, just moments before, his face bright and excited; full of anticipation. It had been Alice who broke the news to him. Bella had not arrived.

"Maybe something happened on the way here?" suggested Jasper, his forehead creased in thought.

"No. I don't think so," replied Edward. Carlisle studied his son.

"What makes you so sure?" asked Rosalie.

"Tell us what happened, Edward," demanded Alice, impatiently.

Edward stared out the huge front window, scanning the woods in front of the house. As he told his story, he kept his eyes glued to the windows, scanning, searching. Hoping.

He quickly told them about Chase, about his desire for revenge.

"I saw him, but I didn't know who he was. That was when my visions were cut off," frowned Alice.

Edward went on to tell about Bella.

"Carlisle, there's something different about her—"

"Duh, Edward, she's a vampire now," laughed Emmett, breaking his sulking spell.

"No. I mean, yes, she's definitely a vampire now," Edward's voice shook with an un-spoken rage. "She's strong and fast. Her physical beauty rivals Rosalie's-" Edward ignored Rosalie's low growl, "Paler than Human Bella was. But her eyes. They aren't red," he spoke breaking off in confusion as he recalled his Bella's warm brown eyes staring back at him.

"What do you mean? She's a new born; they have to be red," argued Jasper. Alice glanced over at him and then back to Edward.

"I don't know. But they're Bella's eyes. Exactly the same as—before. Except...brighter."

The family remained quiet for a moment, contemplating Edward's words. Carlisle nodded to himself as though confirming something.

"That's not all. She has a talent, like us," Edward glanced at Alice and Jasper.

"What can she do?" asked Alice, her eyes wide.

"I don't exactly know that either," Edward turned his head back to the window, his gaze intent.

"But she managed to somehow over-ride Chase's power. As soon as she jumped from that tree, I was suddenly free. So was Victoria. And she was able to hold them back, as I recovered."

"Wow," whispered Alice.

"Damn it! Jasper, I owe you a grand," Emmett groaned. Jasper managed a small victory smile.

"I think it was two," reminded Alice, who had been there when the boys had bet on whether Bella would be born with powers. Emmett scowled.

"Cheater," he muttered, glaring playfully at Alice. Alice held her hands up in innocence.

"I haven't been able to see Bella! Not since she…was changed," insisted Alice. Carlisle perked up at that, his brow furrowed in thought.

Edward finished his story with their parting of ways and his subsequent shaking of Chase and Victoria. It hadn't been hard, he was much quicker. He had looped back though, to the clearing. The flesh that Chase had dug out of him would re-attach itself, as vampire flesh would do. Unless it was burned. Edward could barelt feel his injuries. The process hadn't taken long and he'd been far to anxious to really feel anything else. Edward didn't speak of his total faith in seeing Bella at the Cullen's when he got back. He didn't need to. His face had said it all the moment he saw that she wasn't there. He obviously hadn't considered the idea that she wouldn't show up.

"What do you think, Carlisle? About Bella?" asked Edward, in attempts to distract himself from sinking pit he felt below him.

"I'm not sure just yet, Edward. I think I'm going to need more details to know for certain," he hedged the question and Edward picked up on it. He immediately tuned into his father's head to find him reciting a Medical encyclopedia.

Edward glared.

"Well, what should we do? Should we go looking for her?" asked Alice eagerly. She has missed her friend terribly over the past months. She was scared for Bella, too...what had happened to her?

"No," Edward shook his head. More than anything, he wanted to go out and find his Bella. But he knew she needed to come to them. To him. When he'd left her, he'd chosen to ignore the indecision in her eyes. But now, he realized she had to make the choice on her own. "She'll get here. Sooner or later. Also, it would be hard for us to find her. She has no scent."

Edward smirked slightly as Carlisle was shocked into letting down his guard.

_No scent? Oh, Bella. How did this happen to you?_

"What? What happened to her?" demanded Edward, his golden eyes ablaze.

"I don't—I'm not sure, Edward. I want to be sure," his voice was pleading. Edward finally nodded, frightened at this father's tone.

"Hurry home, Bella," whispered Edward softly.

* * *

When Bella awoke, it was dark. She scrambled out of her hiding cave and brushed the leaves from Edwards's coat, wondering vaguely how long she'd been sleeping.

_Sleeping,_ she repeated the words to herself in disgust. _Some vampire I am._

She took a couple steps forward and then stopped abruptly, her nose flexing madly. The un-mistakable smell she loved so dearly assaulted her sensitive nose.

_Edward!_ He was home. He made it back. Bella quickened her step, her mind racing. As she neared the house for the second time that day, she paused. She was so close to him. A thrill of anticipation shivered its way down her body, but she shook it off.

_He left you. Don't ever forget that_, spoke that tiny, annoying voice from the back of her head.

Bella crept closer to the house.

As she neared the front window, a beautiful melody suddenly filled the air. Bella paused and closed her eyes. A haunting melody, filled with pain…heartache.

_Edward._

She peered carefully in the window. And there he was, in profile. He sat at his baby grand piano, eyes closed, his fingers flying up and down the ivory keys. Bella watched, mesmerized, as the music suddenly turned soft and tender. His face registered sadness as his fingers slowed to show each key more attention, the haunting song turning into something more. Bella could feel the sweetness, the longing in each note.

She needed in. She needed to be closer to him. She wasn't sure why, the front door was not far, but Bella found herself pulling open the large window, just high enough so that she could squeeze her small body inside And then there she was. Inside the Cullen's house. The music swelled around her; Edward had obviously not heard her. She stepped closer, as though beckoned . Her eyes remained trained on Edward's face, his eyes still closed. She noticed his forehead was creased in a deep worry and she wondered what was wrong.

Suddenly, so suddenly that Bella's hands flew to her face, the music stopped and Edward's head lowered onto the hard ivory keys. The piano responded with a clash of notes, disjoined and random. She watched, motionless, as Edward smashed the keys with his fists, his head still on the keys.

Bella's heart broke.

She licked her lips and opened her mouth.

"Don't stop," her voice came out soft, whispery. She was out of practice talking out loud and she wasn't sure he had heard her at first. He didn't move. And then, slowly, Bella watched as his head came up, turning very slowly towards her.

His eyes, when she could finally see them, were wide with disbelief, wonder. His mouth hung open in surprise and automatically, he began to rise from the bench.

"Please," she whispered, her arms wrapping around herself automatically. In an instant, Edward understood that she was requesting two things. To continue playing the piano, yes. But also not to greet her, not to touch her.

Against every fiber in his body, he forced himself to sit back on the bench. He slowly started to play again, a different song, this one soft…warm. But his eyes remained glued to Bella. He was afraid she would disappear, though he wasn't completely sure that he wasn't imagining her.

Bella heard soft noises behind her, but she didn't turn around. Her total being was completely focused on Edward and his music. She took another step closer. And then another. She was so close to Edward now, if he leaned out, he could touch her. She shivered. Edward's eyes followed her every move but he didn't stop playing. He wasn't even sure what he was playing, the music just flowed. Flowed in a way that it hadn't for so many quiet months. So many Bella-less months.

Bella took a couple more steps until she was standing beside Edward, next to the piano. She saw Edward's eyes widen and then a second later, he moved over slightly on the bench, making room for her. She sat down noiselessly, her body hyperaware of Edward next to her. They weren't touching, but his proximity alone brought goose bumps to her milky skin. She was suddenly glad she was wearing a long sleeves.

Edward had to touch her. He couldn't take it anymore. She was so close, she was right there. Bella listened to the closing notes. The song was almost over and she knew it. When the last note faded into the dark night, everything was suddenly so quiet. So real.

"Bella," she heard him whisper her name and she turned to him. Suddenly, she was in his arms. He held her so tightly, fiercely. Bella held him back, her face pressed against his neck, inhaling deeply. Emotions raged through her.

"Bella, Bella," he whispered, tucking back a strand of hair that had come loose from her careless pony-tail.

"Edward," she managed to get out, her voice still dry, cracked. He sighed in her arms, gathering her closer to him.

And then once more, he sighed. But it held a different tone and he pulled away from her, his hand finding her face, his eyes, finding her own eyes. Bella was surprised at the softness she found, the tenderness. She pulled back slightly, confused, Edward's hand fell from her face. She wasn't sure what had seen in her expression, but his brow creased for a moment, before smoothing out. So many un-spoken words, so much to say..and yet, Bella had no idea where to start.

"Alice is going hysterical," whispered Edward, his face reluctant. "Do you mind—"

"Alice..." started Bella, her body turning in anticipation. Her every thought had been focused on Edward. She had forgotten about her best friend. _Well, my old best friend_, she amended silently, sadly.

"Bella!" screamed a voice from the stairs. "Bella!" Alice streaked across the huge room, flung her tiny body at Bella and clutched her tightly for a second before pulling herself away in shock.

"You…wow. You really are—I didn't believe—Bella. Wow! Look at you! You are--god, you're breathtaking!" Alice's eyes shone with happiness as her gaze swept over Bella's face and body. Bella stood up, holding very still, a tentative smile on her lips. Alice's expression suddenly turned sad as she looked back at Bella's face, seeing Bella...but also seeing someone else, someone who knew too much about pain.

And then she noticed her eyes.

"Bella?" she asked softly.

"Alice," Bella answered back. "Alice, I don't know." Her voice choked up and Alice grabbed her again in a hug.

"Alice, easy there, let Bella breath," spoke Edward voice from the piano.

"Let me have my moment!" snapped Alice, not letting go.

Bella laughed quietly and hugged her back, shutting her eyes tightly against the emotion.

"Alice, you're hogging Bella!" said a loud voice. Bella opened her eyes and saw Emmett's huge hulking body looming over the two of them.

Alice loosened her hug and allowed Emmett to swoop down and hug the both of them. He straightened up and smiled at Bella.

"You couldn't possibly beat me in an arm wrestle. Your eyes aren't even red. What kinda new-born are you?" he teased. But Bella saw past the light words and into his worry.

"Bella," came a soft, feminine voice from behind Emmett.

"Esme," she whispered as Alice pushed her forward and into Esme Cullen's embrace.

"Oh Bella. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," she whispered, clutching Bella tightly. Bella hugged her back and spotted Rosalie standing near the stairs. She smiled at Bella, but the smile didn't meet her eyes. Not even close.

"Bella," spoke Jasper from the other side of the kitchen, keeping his distance. She had to grin at the handomse blond vampire, who surely must be remembering the last time they seen one another.

"It's okay now, Jasper. I bite back."

Jasper face registered the rest of the family's shock at Bella's words, but he recovered quickly and grinned back. Edward's face glowed. He felt a surge of hope as he watched Bella hug Jasper.

Carlisle was the last to enter the grand room. His eyes were warm, but Edward could hear detect worry in his guarded thoughts.

"Welcome home, Bella," he said quietly, the last to embrace his Bella. Edward watched silently as his father very subtly looked Bella over. He wondered what he was looking for. And what he was concluding.

"We're so glad you're here, Bella," said Esme softly, taking Bella'a hand and guiding her to the couch.

"I would have been here sooner but…" she trailed off and looked back up at Edward, who had not moved from the piano bench. He felt frozen, mesmerized by Bella. He couldn't peal his eyes away from her. He was alos afriad of scaring her. He could feel her hesitation around him. Around all of them.

"It's okay. You're here now," Carlisle nodded, his smile reassuring.

"Actually, I kind of fell asleep in the woods, not too far away," the words had fallen out before she could think. Bella froze, realizing she had just given away something.

_That's right everyone! I'm not just a monster…but I'm a freak too! Welcome back, me!_

Emmett was the first to respond. He guffawed, slapping the chair beside him.

"Sleeping! You wish," he laughed. Bella's eyes found Edwards, desperate to take her words back. Edward suppressed his shock and smiled back at Bella, his heart full, his emotions on over-drive.

"I think Bella has quite a story for us," said Carlisle. "But first, Bella, do you need to eat?"

Bella paused, her eyes still trained on Edward. She slowly turned towards the rest of the Cullen's, bracing herself.

"Do you have any pizza?"

* * *

**A/N-Yay! I finally wrote a longer chapter! I had to get this out...I'm in my week of finals and have tons of studying to do. But this chapter had to be writen before I could properly concentrate. I'll be finsihed my exams on Thursday and then free to write (guilt-free!) for a couple weeks. This chapter has not been proof-read (lack of time) but I promise to go back and read it when I can escape my books for a few moments. Hopefully, it's not too horribly riddled with errors.**

**Plea****se please, if you have read my story this far, leave me a note/review--or just say hi! There are so many of you on my alert list, I'd love to know what you quiet ones think! And to those who have been frequent commenters...keep it coming! You guys are awesome.**

**Thanks again for reading!**


	12. Chapter 11 Storytelling

**Chapter Eleven Storytelling**

_God, this is illegally delicious…_

Bella tried her best to ignore the Cullen's incredulous stares as she practically tore apart an innocent slice of warm, gooey pizza in front of her.

They tried not to stare, Bella knew she should give them credit for trying--and she also couldn't really blame them—she must be a sight to see—vampire on the outside, God knows what on the inside. After the initial shock had worn off, Edward had quietly convened with Alice, who left the house, returning quickly with two large boxes of piping hot pizza.

Bella demolished piece number three in a matter of seconds.

Emmett walked up behind her and touched her shoulder, squeezing quickly, a puzzled look on his face.

"Emmett?" she asked, between mouthfuls of pizza, "did you want some?" she joked weakly.

"I just needed to make sure. Again. You sure _feel_ like a vampire…pizza, huh," he frowned and looked over at Rosalie, who had not moved from her perch by the stairs.

"Thanks for the food, Alice," spoke Bella, glanced up from the table. Alice smiled at her, eyes dark. Bella shifted her own eyes to Edward, who sat across from her in a white leather recliner. He smiled back. He was the only one who didn't look baffled by her recent revelations. Everyone else seems to be waiting for her to speak. _Or maybe they're waiting for me to morph another head or grow a couple more arms,_ Bella thought dryly. Bella cleared her throat, placing her fourth piece of pizza down in the pizza box. She wiped at her mouth self-consciously.

"Well. I don't know if I can tell you guys much you don't already know. I don't remember a whole lot," she spoke directly to Carlisle, knowing he was quietly "diagnosing" her. She trembled slightly, wondering what he would come up with_. Maybe he already knows what I am_. But his face gave nothing away. He looked at her encouragingly.

"Just whatever you can remember, Bella," he said, his eyes warm.

Edward clasped his hands between his knees, resisting the urge to grab her and run. Run her far away from everything that had happened, everything that was going to happen. Her life as she knew it was officially over and he so badly wanted to protect her from the pain.

"I jumped from that cliff. I was waiting around for Jacob, he was out patrolling.." Bella trailed off, mentally smacking herself once again. Was she betraying the wolves by revealing what they were to the Cullen's?

"We already know, Bella. It's okay," said Edward softly, sadly. Bella looked at him, confused, but continued.

"How did you—never mind, it doesn't matter. So I was waiting for Jacob and I got…bored," Bella quickly edited her real reason for jumping—relieved that Edward couldn't see it in her thoughts.

"We had talked about cliff jumping before. I guess I decided I'd just do it myself. So I jumped. When I hit the water, it was cold, I was confused and disoriented. I couldn't find my way back up to the surface. And then, suddenly, something was pulling at me. I thought at first I was being pulled upwards, towards the sky. But I wasn't. Something had my ankle and it was dragging me deeper. I couldn't breathe. I managed to fight my way to the surface…and for one quick moment I broke free. I remember seeing Jacob," _Jacob. Oh God, Jacob_, "I yelled for him, but that was it. Whatever was pulling me, found me again and I was back down. That's all I remember. I guess I blacked out. I think I must have been unconscious for a few days. I only remember small pieces of the in-between days. I don't know what's real though, and what I was dreaming,"

Bella had been staring out the window as she told her story, but when she spoke of dreaming, she turned her head to assess the Cullen's reactions.

Another freakish revelation. She knew very well that vampires could not sleep, could not dream.

"Dreaming?" repeated Carlisle, encouragingly, as Alice and Jasper exchanged concerned glances. Edward's eyes widened slightly. Esme touched her shoulder and Emmett went to sit beside Rosalie, for once, speechless.

"I…yeah. I sleep. I dream. Like I always did. I remember flashes of Victoria, her red hair. Teeth. Blood. But not much else. When I finally woke up, I was in a cave, alone. I knew right away what I was, what had happened. I-I didn't leave for a day or two. I guess I was trying to figure out what I should do,"

"Weren't you thirsty?" asked Jasper quietly, curiously.

"I-no. I mean, not really. I felt sick. There were so many smells assaulting my senses. None of them made me hungry. They made me feel horrible. At one point, a deer came by the cave, grazing. I saw it and knew immediately that I should want it…want its blood. But I was revolted by the smell. I got out of there. I knew something was off," said Bella quickly, her eyes flickering to Edward's face and then down to the table.

"I-well, I found a bar. Full of men. Outside, I realized again that their blood stank. It wasn't calling to me. I didn't feel any urge to kill them. So I went it. I almost wanted to feel that urge, to know that at least I was normal," Bella chuckled dryly, "normal for a vampire, anyways," she corrected.

"You were able to be in there with all of them? And not kill a single one?" whispered Esme, her voice full of awe. Bella nodded nervously, her eyes flicking to Carlisle.

"I walked through to the restroom. I wanted to—well, see what I looked like. I was confused. I felt like a vampire…but I wanted to see if I looked like one." Alice nodded, a grin breaking out on her face.

"I Would have given my entire wardrobe, _including_ the new stuff from Paris fashion week, to have seen the look on your face!"

"I was definitely convinced," Bella allowed a small smile, touching her face absently, recalling the beauty she had been shocked to see. Edward felt a smile spread across his face. He couldn't help it…she was so beautiful. His emotions were so strongly tied to hers. He wanted to touch her face again, to trace her jaw line—he wanted to hold her and never let go.

"I left without incident. But I was getting hungry. So hungry. I knew I needed to try some blood. So I killed a deer and drank its blood," Bella shuttered at the memory. "At first I thought I was okay. I felt okay. But then, I got dizzy..Everything got blurry and I couldn't see right anymore. I think I passed out. When I woke, Chase was there," Edward's eyes darkened and his hand went to his stomach, rubbing the tender flesh.

"He seemed nice at first, helpful. I wasn't afraid. He kept his distance, told me I was the same as him. He seemed confused about my "newborn" status. My eyes, the sleeping. He didn't seem to know what to make of me. I told him about my aversion to the blood. He thought it was weird, but we cooked some of the deer…I ate it and immediately felt better, stronger. As I ate, he went off in the woods. I heard him talking to someone. I guess Victoria. It freaked me out and I decided I should take off. I stopped to look for a cell phone. He came back to see me poking through his bag. That's when he did the same thing to me as he did to you, Edward," Bella saw Edward nod from the corner of her eye, but she stayed focused on Carlisle.

"I was stuck to that tree. I couldn't move. He revealed that he was working with Victoria, that his part of the deal was keeping me until she got there. And that she was bringing him something he wanted. Then, everything happened so fast. Chase was coming at me. I remember feeling determined. And then I was free. And running. I ran for awhile, going over what had happened, what he had said. I knew I had to go back. He had mentioned he knew the Cullen's…more specifically, that he knew one of you. He said it with a look in his eye…a look that terrified me. So I went back. Got into that tree…and the rest you know from Edward." Bella finished off, clearing her throat quietly.

"That is quite the story, Bella. You're very brave, for going back. You may have saved Edward's life. There is no adequate way we can ever thank you," said Carlisle, his handsome face a mask as he stood up. Bella and Edward both jumped to their feet.

"What-"

"Carlisle-" They both spoke at the same time. Edward glanced at Bella, nodding for her to continue. She turned back to Carlisle.

"What's wrong with me?" she asked, her voice breaking.

"You're going to be okay, Bella. But I have a couple phone calls to make. I have my suspicions, but let me make a couple calls, to be sure," he exited the room quickly, soundlessly. Without eye contact.

Bella nodded, her eyes wary, but resigned. She sank back down, slowly. She suddenly felt drained.

"Bella, you look tired. Would you like to…lie down for a bit?" asked Esme, hesitantly. Bella wondered how awkward those words were to her.

"If you guys don't mind—yeah. I feel…tired," she said, for lack of a better word. Bella realized she'd just slept. But suddenly, she wanted to be away from their eyes, away from the questions in their eyes. The questions that echoed her own terrified thoughts.

"I'll take her up to my room, she can borrow my bed," spoke Alice, jumping up and prancing over to Bella. Bella glanced quickly at Edward, who looked suddenly annoyed.

"Rest well, Bella," said Esme, squeezing Bella's shoulder as Alice pulled her up from the couch. Bella smiled back softly.

Edward got up and trailed Alice and Bella up the stairs, passing Emmett and Rosalie on the way. He couldn't help but notice Rosalie's glare.

He was kicking himself for not having a bed in his room. He would have to do something about that quickly. Especially if Bella was—

He shook his head. He didn't want to go down that road. Not yet.

"Alice?" he heard Bella's sweet voice ask as they entered Alice's huge room.

"Yes, Bella?"

"What do they think happened to me?"

_What do I say, Edward? Should I tell her? _

Edward nodded his head subtlety towards Alice's panicked thought, leaning against the door frame as Bella sat down on Alice's bed, her eyes searching Alice's face.

"They think you're dead," she whispered back, bracing herself. But instead of reacting, Bella just nodded, swinging her legs onto the bed and falling back on the large, fluffy pillow.

"That's what I thought," she said sadly, turning her eyes to Edward. He couldn't stand to see the pain.

"Charlie thinks you're still alive. Jacob, too, I think," Edward said quickly, his voice soft.

Bella immediately sat back up, her eyes widening.

"They do?"

"They do. They haven't given up on you," he replied, wondering if he should have left the Jacob part out. As always, it was hard not being able to read Bella's mind. But the idea seemed to make her so much happier that Edward didn't care about anything else.

"What am I going to do?" she whispered, her desperate eyes on him.

"Get some rest. We'll figure it out, I promise, Bella,"

Bella froze that his words, waves of pain hitting her so hard she began to tremble slightly.

"Bella?" demanded Alice, glancing at Edward and then back to the shaking Bella.

"Bella!" Edward cried, making it to the bed in one quick stride. He took Bella by the shoulders, steadying her. Bella took a breath and looked Edward in the eyes, her own vibrant brown eyes almost glowing with a sudden intensity.

"Please, don't promise me anything, Edward," she said quietly, pulling herself from Edward's grasp. "Thanks for the bed, Alice," she laid back down, turning to her other side, her back to him. Edward's mouth opened slightly, his eyes wide with hurt and confusion.

Alice shot him a look, grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the room, closing the door softly behind her.

* * *

**A/N-I survived exams and am itching to really delve into this story! :) Thank you, thank you all for those awesome reviews from my last chapter! I promise to get back to everyone :) **

**Please, keep reading and reviewing...great things to come**!


	13. Chapter 12 Living in Twilight

Chapter 12 **Living in Twilight**

* * *

Bella curled up on Alice's bed, inhaling the familiar scent of her friend.

She had been tossing and turning for hours. Sleep, it seemed, was not going to be a visitor today_._

_Or is it tonight?_ Bella opened her eyes and squinted towards the shaded window. The light behind was already turning a pinkish purple colour, signaling the setting of the sun. The end of another day.

Bella could hear the Cullen's downstairs, but she had already trained herself to tune them out, as best she could. She had had enough of them talking about her; worrying, wondering.

She could do that on her own.

A single tear trickled down her face and automatically, Bella went to brush it away quickly but stopped, her hand lingering in front of her face.

_I can still cry._

She wasn't sure why, but she suddenly felt an overwhelming relief at the knowledge. She brought her hand back down, allowing the tear to trail down her face and land on the pillow. Absently, she tuned back into the Cullen's, searching for Carlisle's voice…but much like her efforts in the past couple hours, his voice was still the only Cullen she couldn't hear.

"_Edward, stop brooding. She's here, isn't she? Everything will be fine," _Bella heard Alice mutter quietly.

_"Is that right? Is that what you see, Alice?"_ demanded Edward's voice, notes of bitterness and sarcasm coating his words.

Bella pursed her lips together and tuned back out, sitting upright on Alice's bed. She didn't want to hear the fighting. She turned her frame to face the glowing window.

Edward. She felt so disoriented when she was around him; confused by her emotions. She so badly wanted to wrap her arms around his stone shoulders, run her fingers through his impossibly tousled bronze hair and never let go. But there was so much between them. And he had left her for a reason, those many months. He hadn't wanted her anymore. Why were they back? Why were they helping her? Why was he still around? She was having problems being around him…she was both incredibly happy to feel his presence but also knew how he felt about her. How did he stand it?

And yet, the memory of his arms around her, his breath on her face. He seemed happy to see her. Had things changed because she was a vampire? He had said, before he had left her, that he had been tired of pretending he was something he wasn't, tired of pretending he was human…but now. But now?

Bella wrapped her arms around her knees and placed her head on her knee caps.

She hadn't realized how much he could still hurt her, with just three little words. Three little words that had instantly erased the present and set her back to those months of misery—those three little words that peeled away the scabs.

_I promise you._

Bella cringed at the echoing words.

"_Bella?"_

Carlisle. From downstairs, he was calling for her. Was it time?

Bella quickly swung her legs around to the side of the bed, her feet touching the plush carpet. Before she could even really think, she was downstairs, standing in front of Edward, her large eyes wide and blinking rapidly.

"Carlisle?"

"In his study. He wants…you and I to come in. But if you don't want me there-"

Bella cut him off, shaking her head quickly.

"Please come," she replied, her voice sure, strong. So much stronger than she actually felt. Inside, she was whimpering. Inside, she was screaming. _This is it. Time to find out what I am._Despite her recent comment to Edward, she wanted him by her side, undoubtedly. When she looked up at him, she was surprised to see the pleasure on his face at her words. He obvisouly hadn't been expecting her to want him there.

"Bella, I-" Bella watched as Edward seemed to struggle with something, his eyes dark, un-decided.

"Edward?" she questioned, her eyes darting from him, to the hallway leading to Carlisle's study, and back to Edward again. His face changed, the in-decision disappearing.

"Nothing. Ready?"

Bella took a breath and nodded once.

Edward led Bella down the hall, a hallway that suddenly seemed endlessly long and foreboding. Bella vaguely wondered if it would be inappropriate to ask Edward to hum something—perhaps the Death March—_but I'm already dead. I guess it can't get any worse._

_Can it?_

Edward held open the heavy cherry wood door to the study for her, and Bella walked in hesitantly. She'd been in the room before, once, it felt like ages ago, when she had learned of Carlisle's long history. Bella noticed that everything looked exactly the same. _Like a college dean's office_, Bella remembered.

_I'm the only thing that has changed._

Carlisle sat behind the huge mahogany desk, piles of books open in front of him. Old, dusty, thick books. Bella realized that had also changed. Before, the desk had been immaculate. This time, it was a mess, as though Carlisle had dumped half of one of his bookcases haphazardly across his desk. She glanced over at the nearest shelf and nodded, confirming her thoughts. Carlisle noticed her gaze and smiled at her.

"Sit down Bella, Edward," he started, motioning to a black leather couch across from him. With a glance at Edward, Bella saw that he looked just as wary as she did. He was scanning his father's book selection. Bella didn't notice him tense up, his eyes suddenly on Carlisle's.

Bella sat, folding her hands awkwardly in her lap.

"How are you feeling, Bella?" he asked, his eyes concerned.

Bella shrugged.

"Okay. I mean, good, I guess," she stammered.

_What's wrong with me? _Is what she meant to say. But the words wouldn't come out.

"Bella, you've been patient. I know you want to know what's happened—why you are feeling the way you are. You knew even before you were one of us that vampires don't sleep. They don't eat human food. You're aware that newborns are un-controllable and that their eyes remain red for years. And you know that none of this appears to apply to you," spoke Carlisle, his voice soft, his eyes only on her.

Bella felt her hand being squeezed. She paid no attention, her focus completely on Carlisle and his words.

"Bella, I wasn't sure at first, but it appears now that my suspicions were correct. Victoria wasn't the one who bit you, she didn't change you," Carlisle said slowly, his eyes watching for Bella's reaction.

"Then who?" she mouthed soundlessly, un-aware that she was suddenly clenching Edward's hand.

Carlisle sighed quietly.

"Has Edward ever spoken of the Volturi?"

Bella sat back, slightly frustrated as Carlisle answered her question with his own.

_The Volturi. _

Her eyes flickered to the paintings Edward had shown her on her first tour of the Cullen household. Aro, Marcus, Caius. It seemed like years ago.

But how could she forget? She glanced over at Edward—and did a double-take. His face had gone bone white; his eyes--when they met hers--were filled with a look of sinking dread.

"Edward?" she questioned, panicked. And when he didn't answer she called his name again, her eyes frantically turning to Carlisle.

"Edward can't help it. He's already heard what I have to tell you, Bella. I see you're aware of the Volturi, then," he motioned to the paintings.

Bella's head dipped forward, as though on puppet strings, her eyes still on Edward's face. He averted his eyes and turned his head, his shoulders slumped.

"The man who I believe changed you is part of the Volturi," stated Carlisle, his voice changing. Bella's eyes snapped back to his face in surprise. He suddenly sounded all professional. Bella realized that he was using his doctor voice.

_It must be bad_, she realized. _It must be really, really bad._

She pulled her hand from Edward's and wrapped her arms around herself, prepared.

"His name is Nathaniel. He has been around a very, very long time. Much longer than I myself have been. He is rather secluded, even within the Volturi. I have only met him once in my years and it was under very…special circumstances. He has an extremely dangerous gift and stays hidden because of it."

Bella stared at Carlisle, uncomprehending.

"Why would he change me? Why wouldn't Victoria--?"

"I'm still trying to figure out exactly how it came to be that he came all the way here to change you, Bella. Why he would come out of hiding for you. What could Victoria possible have promised him, told him about you…"he mused to himself, almost forgetting about Bella.

"What is his gift?" whispered Bella, her stomach flip-flopping.

Carlsile pulled himself out of his thoughts and looked Bella straight in the eye.

"He turns humans into hybrids."

Bella froze.

"Hybrids?" she echoed, confused.

"Half-vampire, half-human. Nathaniel is the only vampire in the world who can turn humans into hybrids," continued Carlisle, his eyes firmly on Bella, his doctor tone returning.

"So…I'm-?"

"Yes. You are half vampire; you're strong, extremely physically beautiful, you can run and hunt quickly. You can drink blood, much like we can, and survive. You have excellent eye sight. Every one of your senses has developed. And your heart does not beat. But you're also half human. You sleep. You dream. You crave human food. I don't know what else it is you do…that is human, but I'm sure there are other things."

Bella took a breath, digesting his words, fighting emotions.

_I cry._

"A hybrid," she repeated slowly, mulling over the new, unfamiliar word. She turned to Edward again, confused.

"That doesn't sound so bad. I mean, sure, it's different…but," Bella trailed off as Edward glanced at Carlisle. Carlisle stared at Edward for a moment. Bella was sure they were having a silent discussion.

"Nathaniel is used by the Volturi as a type of weapon. He is regarded as the vehicle to a victim's slow mental torture, an un-raveling of sorts. You see Bella, hybrids are, historically, caught between worlds. The reason we can't smell you is because you're not one of us. But you're not human either. It's as though you don't exist. So far, my books tell me that every human turned hybrid by Nathaniel has—eventually ended up either being killed or killing themselves," Carlisle cringed at his choice of words.

"Why?" whispered Bella, but she felt detached. _He can't be talking about me._

"The books report the hybrid is driven to the brink of—well, of madness. Tortured by their apparent disconnection from either world. The mind will slowly un-ravel until it is practically gone all together. Some will begin killing violently, needlessly, apparently forgetting the Volturi's rules, or perhaps just not caring. Others will end it their selves, before the Volturi can step in."

_Madness. Un-ravel._

Bella felt as though she'd been kicked in the stomach. She felt Edward's hand on her shoulder, but she didn't turn.

_Not one of us._

Carlisle was still talking. She heard "your gift" and "experiments" but nothing else registered. Bella stood up, interrupting Carlisle's sentence.

"What does this mean for me, Carlisle?" she asked quietly.

"What do you mean? "

"I mean, what's going to happen to me?"

"I don't know just yet, Bella. I've been researching though. There isn't much literature on hybrids, very few records have been kept. Hybrids are rare and generally not spoken of," Bella noticed that he hedged the question.

"Nothing, Bella. Nothing is going to happen to you," Edward spoke for the first time. "You're going to be okay. There are-" he stopped abruptly, silenced by a look from Carlisle and quite possibly, a warning Bella's ears couldn't hear.

Bella eyed them both suspiciously.

"Please. Stop that. Just tell me, I'm not fragile Human Bella anymore…" she pleaded, trailing off.

_Well, half of me isn't, anyways_, she thought bitterly. Carlisle nodded.

"As a hybrid, you walk alone, Bella. You walk in a dark place and as time passes, you will find you're unable to pull yourself either to the vampire side, or to the human side. Hybrids are creatures who can only survive so long before the weight of living in between kills them. It's a very slow, painful process. That is why the Volturi use it on their greatest enemies," confessed Carlisle, unable to meet Bella's horrified stare.

Bella stiffened.

_Alone. _

"Why me? I don't understand…why would she do this to me?" Bella's voice dropped, Edward stood beside her and took her hand, his eyes suddenly very clear.

"Can't I ignore one side and live like the other? Ignore my human instincts and live like a vampire?"

"It doesn't exactly work like that, Bella. You can't ignore the sleep you'll need; the food your body will desperately crave," spoke Carlisle.

"Why not?" demanded Bella feverishly, almost shouting, "_Why not?_"

"I have to keep researching, Bella. There might be something. Something I read about long ago. But the only one who knows much about it is Nathaniel and, for obvious reasons, I doubt he will be very forthcoming with the information," Carlisle rubbed his temples and glanced down at his books.

Bella's eyes filled with tears as she turned to the door of the study. She fought them desperately, wiped them away in shame, vaguely realizing that it had been only an hour ago that she'd been grateful for her human tears. Now, she could only feel disgust.

_Half human, half vampire._ She had been wrong. It could get worse. She took off down the hallway.

"Bella?" questioned Carlisle from his desk. But his voice just echoed around her head and disappeared. She was barely aware that Edward was following her, calling her name.

She found her way back into the common living room and fixed her gaze on the front door, ignoring Jasper and Alice's words of surprise.

Edward glanced at them helplessly, as Bella opened the heavy front door.

"Bella," he tried one last time. She heard something in his tone, she turned, her face a picture of frightened vulnerability.

"Edward," she responded, her hand resting lightly on the door handle.

"Stay," he said simply, his voice dry, cracked. Raw.

Bella examined his expression, her own softening, breaking. She wanted to. She wanted to so badly.

She hesitated.

"Please," he said simply. He watched as her eyes—god, her eyes—filled up with tears. "Bella," he whispered, reaching out for her. He was close. So close. She stared at his hand a long moment before pulling her eyes back to his face.

"I don't know how long I have, how long I'll be _me_. There is something I have to do," she replied, her eyes suddenly set in determination.

"Can I help?" he asked. He wasn't sure he could watch her walk out that door alone. Not now. Not after everything.

"I have to go see Jacob," she replied quietly, dropping her eyes.

Edward nodded slowly, his chest constricting tightly.

Of course. Of course.

That was his answer.

She took a step back, her eyes back on his.

"I'm coming back. And when I do, I expect you to have a cure," she joked weakly.

Edward smiled back, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Be careful, Bella," he whispered. She nodded quickly.

"Careful is my middle name," she replied, hoping her tone was light. With that, she turned and walked out into the darkness. Edward watched as she disappeared from his sight.

A moment later, he followed.

**A/N: This whole story was inspired by a song called Living in Twilight by The Weepies (and, obviously, SM's books!). The song always manage to touch me. This chapter, when Bella finds out what she is, especially echos the words to the song. Google it. It's beautiful :)**

**Please do me a favour and review! Let me know what you thought about this chapter. It was an emotional one for me :)**


	14. Chapter 13 This Moment Keeps on Moving

Chapter 13 **This Moment Keeps on Moving**

* * *

"Shit," muttered Jacob in frustration, dropping the grease covered wrench onto the hood of his car. The tool met the cars metal with a loud clang before falling to the concrete floor and bouncing harmlessly to his foot.

Like so many nights in the past week, Jacob found himself tinkering uselessly in his garage. It wasn't that he especially had anything to do –but the tinkering got his mind off everything whirling around him. It allowed him a chance to breathe. And a chance to think.

And thinking he'd been doing. It had been only 24 hours ago that Edward Cullen had crossed his path. Had given him a new hope for Bella's survival. A new hope, yes, but also a new danger.

As he pulled himself under his Volkswagen rabbit, his thoughts drifted to the pack. As soon as he had phased after his "meeting" with Edward, Jacob had told the pack everything. He had been ready for Sam Uley to give the order—to track down Victoria, to rip her to shreds…and of course, to bring back Bella—unscathed and human, in his mind.

But Sam didn't quite see it his way. And Jacob had to eventually grudgingly agree that the alpha had many valid points, the most convincing being that they had no idea where to start looking for Victoria.

None of it really mattered though. The bottom line was that Jacob's hope was alive again. Bella was out there-she was somewhere out there. Alive. _Alive._

And close. He could feel it now. _But is_ _she still human--and will the answer make a difference?_

He scooted out slightly from under the car, reaching absently for the can of soda he had set down near-by. Where was it? He could have sworn he'd placed it by the front tire…

Jacob sat up quickly his eyes scanning the garage. Something was off. He could sense it. Jacob breathed the air quickly, searching.

_Nothing._

"Jacob," said a voice. A voice he knew only too well; the voice that talked to him in his dreams…the voice _of_ his dreams.

"Bells?" he leapt to his feet searching again for her face…her smile…her…

"Jake, I'm here. Stay back though," her voice plead. Jacob whirled around. There she was. His heart soared; he could make her figure out in the darkest corner. A grin broke out onto his face, her words not yet registering. Two steps, three and he could almost touch her, wrap her in his—

Jacob stopped, his smile slowly melting from his face.

"Bella? You don't…smell. I can't smell you," Jacob suddenly backed up a step, narrowing his eyes. "You're not Bella," he proclaimed, his tone suddenly changing.

Bella took a step out from her shadowed protection. Jacob's eyes widened at her appearance. She was beautiful—un-earthly beautiful. She was Bella…but she was like—the supermodel version of Bella. Jacob didn't care what it meant. He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

"Jake. It's me," she whispered, her eyes soft, sad. Jacob took three steps forward and wrapped her tightly in his warm arms. Bella felt his entire body suddenly freeze. She listened as his heart missed a beat and then hammered on too quickly. But she hugged him back tightly, holding him as long as she could. She realized it could be the last time. She cringed inwardly, waiting for him to push her away, to twist his face in disgust at her lack of heart-beat, her icy skin. But he didn't. Instead, he drew in a ragged breath and held her tighter.

"What did they do to you? What the _fuck_ did they do to you?" his voice broke and his shoulders shook.

"I'm sorry," was all she could think to say. "Jake. I'm so, so sorry," she tried to pull away, to look into his eyes, but he held her to him, still shaking.

"Calm, Jake, calm," she soothed. Morphing would be a very, very bad idea. Bella pushed against him again, this time, with success. She held him at arm's length, looking into his deep eyes.

"You're strong," he muttered, reaching out to touch a thumb touch her cheek. "And cold," he shivered slightly, withdrawing his hand. Bella nodded. "No heart-beat," he continued, glancing down at her chest.

"But why don't I smell you? The other bloodsuckers, they stink so badly!" Bella smiled slightly at that but didn't respond. She found herself wondering why Jacob smelled so pleasant to her. She would have thought his blood would smell like any other humans blood did.

"But you're still _you_, Bells. Aren't you? You still seem like you," he whispered and Bella laughed shakily.

"I'm still me, Jake. I think," she replied and Jacob swept her up in another bone-crushing hug. Bella laughed again at the relief she could feel radiating from him.

"I thought that was it for you, Bells. I thought you'd drown. God, I thought—it was all my fault. Bells, I'm so sorry. I fucked up. If I'd been there-"

"Jake, don't. Please. I jumped. It was my stupid fault. I was being so—reckless, I wasn't thinking. You tried, you tried to save me…I saw you before-"

"Victoria did this to you," he broke in, not a question. A statement.

"She-kind of. Jake, it's so complicated. Everything is so messed up," Bella trailed off, looking away.

"Did you—have you seen _him_?"

Bella nodded, her eyes shining with un-shed tears. Jacob nodded.

"Are you, I mean, did he…"

"Like I said, Jake, things are complicated." Jacob seemed to let that pass.

"I thought I wouldn't feel anything for you. Once you were changed. I thought you wouldn't be Bella anymore, that you'd be some crazy new vampire, wanting to kill everything in sight-" Jacob stopped suddenly, narrowing his eyes at his friend. "Wait. Why aren't you trying to kill me? Isn't that what new leeches do? Aren't you supposed to be trying to rip me limb from limb?"

"Yeah. I should be. But something—different happened to me, Jake," Bella hesitated. Jacob stiffened, his hands balling into fists at his side, as though preparing for a fight.

"Whose ass will I have to kick?" he joked, his eyes tight.

"A really, really old Italian guys ass," replied Bella.

"I never liked those guys anyways. Damn pizza making, pepperoni loving jerks…so wait, what happened?"

Bella took a breath and told her story quickly, as quickly as she could without thoroughly confusing Jacob. As she went on, his eyes grew bigger and bigger, his mouth tightened and his fists clenched white.

"Shit, Bells. So wait…this hybrid thing means you're part vampire but also-"

Bella nodded and suddenly felt herself being lifted off her feet. Jacob shouted a couple words of excitement and swung her around, finally placing Bella back on her feet.

"Jake! What the hell!" she laughed, feeling more like herself, Human Bella, than she had since she'd been changed.

"You're still part human," he replied.

"It sounds better than it is," she reported, instantly losing her smile. Jacob smirked and rolled his eyes. Bella frowned at him and relayed the information Carlisle had delivered only an hour ago. Jacob's smirk vanished, replaced by a look of fear.

"But look at you, you're fine. You're you. I don't understand how this can be a bad thing," he shrugged his broad shoulders, eyes on Bella.

"It's supposed to happen slowly. But I don't know what that's supposed to mean. Jake, I don't know how much longer I will be me. That's why I came to see you," she breathed.

"To recruit me to kick that asshole Italian guy in the head?" he joked. But his eyes were still very serious. Bella shook her head slowly.

"To ask you to take care of Charlie for me," replied Bella solemnly.

"Charl-no, but Bella…you're alive! You can tell everyone you were kidnapped..abducted by aliens...or that you got amnesia! We'll all go and laugh at your gravestone and see if there are any money back guarantees on funerals. Maybe even dig up the casket…those things aren't cheap, you know," babbled Jacob, shaking his head.

"Jake. Look at me. I look different. And I think Charlie would notice that my heart no longer beats. That I'm colder than a Washington winter."

"We'll tell him…" Jacob wracked his head frantically, "We'll say that you contracted a terrible disease. That the heartbeat thing is a side-effect. We'll give you fake medication. You can lay in bed for a few days each month to show how delicate you are and pop tic-tacs every couple hours--"

"Jake…" Bella didn't know if she should be laughing or crying at his earnest tone.

"We can do this, Bells. You can have your life back," he was serious.

"And when I start to go nuts? Will that be part of the "disease" too, Jake? Will you up my tic-tac dose? Maybe put me on Lifesavers? Will you let Charlie lock me away in an institution? Or will you tell him, 'oh don't worry, this is how it's supposed to happen…she's half vampire, don't worry about it, pretty soon she'll kill herself. After she murders a bunch of people.' Have you thought that far, Jake?" Bella challenged. Jacob shook his head.

"So instead you're going to let Charlie believe you're dead?" demanded Jacob, suddenly furious. He slammed his fist against his car. "You're going to let them all think you're dead?"

"I am dead, Jake," responded Bella, her voice flat.

"Only half dead!" yelled Jacob, defensively. They stared at each other a silent minute before Bella's mouth twitched upwards. Jacob started at her angrily.

"What?" he asked. "What the hell can be so funny"

"Only half-dead," she repeated, starting to grin. "Can a person even be half-dead?" she asked, a frantic laugh escaping.

"This isn't funny, Bella. Don't throw away your life—yes, you still have one. We can make this work. Stop acting like this hybrid thing means only gloom and doom," Jacob plead, his eyes begging.

Bella felt the smile slip from her face.

"I've already thought about it, Jake. It can't work. People aren't stupid. They will take one look at me and know something's happened,"

"Cosmetic surgery!" shouted Jacob, his eyes wild. Bella shook her head.

"It will only hurt Charlie more in the long run. And what happens when he realizes I'm not aging? And when I start going crazy…when I start murdering people and not caring? I'm pretty sure he'll realize grounding me won't do any good," Bella added sarcastically. She took a breath. She needed Jacob to see; to understand. She needed his reassurance that she was doing the right thing. She needed his approval.

"I think you're making a mistake, Bella," he said quietly, his voice suddenly level. "I think your running away from this because you're scared."

"Of course I'm scared, Jake! I am so beyond scared it's not even funny. But I refuse to put Charlie's life in danger. I refuse to give him hope when there isn't any. I really would have liked for you to be okay with this; to help me…to help him get through this. But if you're going to be like this than never mind, Jake. Never mind," Bella shrugged angrily, turning her back on Jacob and heading towards the garage door.

"Bella…" Jacob followed her out into the dark night, his head pounding. Bella turned, unable to disguise the hope in her expression.

"Will I still see you?" he asked, all anger melting away. Bella sighed, her shoulders sinking.

"I suppose I _am_ going to have to come back when you change your mind," she joked. Jacob flinched.

"I don't think I can help you, Bells. I don't think I can take part in something so…painful, so unfair."

"Life isn't fair, Jake. Hasn't anyone ever told you that?"

"But you're dead, Bells, you just reminded me of that, remember? Don't the rules change in that case?"

"Only half dead. Only half," replied Bella, her voice soft. Jacob groaned in frustration.

"Maybe it would be better if you were all dead," he bit back, his face twisting bitterly. Bella froze, her face shocked at his words. A second later, she turned and took off into the woods surrounding the Blacks property. She ignored Jacob's shouts behind her.

She knew he had said that only because he was angry, but he had a point. Bella kept running, the wind feeling good on her hard face. If I was dead, really dead, no one would be hurting…well, they would mourn, of course, but they'd be able to move on. They'd get over it and go on with their lives. Bella knew she couldn't subject Charlie or any human to a sudden Bella resurrection. She had hoped at first, she had told herself every single thing Jacob had just finished saying to her. She had argued with herself that it could work…that it _would_ work. But she knew she'd been only kidding herself. Too much had changed and she couldn't pick up her old life like nothing had happened. She couldn't put Charlie and her friends in such danger. If the Volturi had allowed this Nathaniel vampire to change her in the first place, what would they do if they found out she was attempting to live a normal life in Forks? How many would they kill?

She couldn't risk it—as selfish as she wanted to be, as much as she would have loved to step back into Bella Swan's life again—she couldn't do it.

Tears burned Bella's eyes as she ran, and when they finally spilled over her lids, she came to a stop, leaning heavily against a near-by pine tree. Slowly, she sank down to the muddy forest floor and allowed the sobs to escape. Her whole frame shook violently as she wrapped her arms around her legs and placed her head between her knees.

Suddenly, a strong pair of arms enveloped her body, picked her up slightly from the mud and pulled her against its body. Bella's pulled her head up long enough to see Edward's burning eyes gazing down at her, concern written all over his features. She squeezed her eyes shut again and allowed herself to be cradled as she curled up as small as she possibly could. Her sobs were quieter now, but still steadily shaking her body.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," he whispered into her hair, his fingers pushing back lose strands from her face. She pressed her face into his neck, tears running off her chin and onto the collar of his shirt. Edward rocked her slowly, his face against her hair.

He hummed to her softly and Bella instantly recognized her lullaby. A sob caught in her throat as she looked back up at him, her tears running quietly down her cheeks; everything suddenly launched into silence.

"Edwa-" he put a finger to her lips to silence her, leaving it there, softly tracing their perfect outline. Bella stared into his eyes, her mind suddenly forgetting everything around her, everything that had happened to her in the past 48 hours, the past week, the past year. It was suddenly just Bella and Edward and the intensity between them. Bella watched, as though in a dream, as Edward's face inched closer to her own, his eyes on hers the entire time, watching, searching for any signs that he should stop.

He wouldn't find any.

Bella closed the short distance feverishly, her eyes closing as her lips found his. Shock wound through her body as their lips met softly, a jolt of electricity coursing through her very being.

_Does he feel this too?_

Her hands found his neck, his hair, tangling themselves intricately as though they belonged. The kiss deepened, she felt Edward's hands on her back, in her own hair. They had never been able to be close like this, Edward had never allowed himself to let down his careful guard. This was entirely unchartered territories.

As Edward's embrace tightened around her and he paused to moan her name, Bella was sure nothing else in the entire world mattered more than this very moment.

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**A/N: I know I'm a tease. But longest chapter yet...excuse any errors...didn't have much time to edit!**

**Happy weekend! Don't forget to leave me a review (or just say hi!) as always, I appreciate each and every one of you guys!**


	15. Chapter 14 Beautiful Mess

Chapter Fourteen- Beautiful Mess

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_Her hands found his neck--his hair-- tangling themselves intricately as though they belonged. The kiss deepened, she felt Edward's hands on her back, in her hair. They had never been able to be close like this, Edward had never allowed himself to let down his careful guard. This was entirely unchartered territories._

_As Edward's embrace tightened around her and he paused to moan her name, Bella was sure nothing else in the entire world mattered except this very moment._

Edward cradled Bella in his arms carefully, leaning down to place her gently in his new bed. He was only vaguely surprised that it had arrived so quickly.

He didn't let himself breathe as Bella groaned softly, her sweet breath caressing his arm.

"Edward," she murmured softly. But her eyes did not open. She curled up into the smallest of balls, her tiny body looking so fragile on his unnecessarily huge king sized bed.

Edward sat on the edge of the bed next to her, pinching the bridge of his nose between his left index finger and thumb, thoughts of the last hour running wildly through his head.

_For the first time, unrestrained, he found himself kissing his love. It felt so right and yet…something managed to nag at the back of his head. Breathless, he pulled away, tightening his hold on Bella, calling her name…checking her eyes to make sure. Her eyes met his and Edward suddenly couldn't tell who was kissing who. Bella's tears had dried now, but Edward could still taste the salt on her cheeks, her skin, her lips as he deepened the kiss. His tongue greeted hers gently, hesitantly, before curving itself around and running along her teeth. He felt Bella's hands in his hair-- his own were unable to settle. As their passion deepened, Edward's hands left Bella's face and made their way to her hip, clutching gently._

Edward groaned softly, his fingers twitching slightly towards Bella's sleeping form. There wasn't a moment that passed by where he didn't want to touch her. But she wasn't ready. She had made that clear.

_His hands ran back up to her hair; her gorgeous dark hair of silk. He pulled at the elastic restraining her tresses and felt them tumble down her back, suddenly free and wild. Edward ran his hands through her hair while his lips pulled back slightly. Never losing contact with her flawlessly clear skin, he kissed his way to her chin and slowly down her neck._

"_Edwar—" she half moaned his name, as he gently rolled her over onto the softness of the forest floor._

"_Bella," he whispered back between kisses, his lips reaching her collar bone, his body slightly ontop of hers now. He knew she was just as strong as he was, perhaps stronger, and yet, he made sure not to put any weight on her. _

"_I can't do this," she finally got out, her eyes closed, her lips parted slightly. But there was something in her tone that stopped Edward, allowing Bella to sit up quickly. Her eyes were wide with something he didn't recognize as she jumped to her feet._

"_Bella, I'm sorry," he called, as she stumbled away from him. Confusion clouded his mind, numbing him as he watched her disappear from his sight._

Edward sighed deeply, watching Bella's quiet sleeping frame. He was beyond worried about her. She hadn't been very far ahead of him, and when he had caught up to her, she had somehow managed to fall into a tree, so hard that the tree had been up-rooted. Scared and wary, she had allowed him to pick her up and carry her back to the Cullen house. On the way, she had fallen deeply asleep.

Edward knew that what Bella was going through was not normal. Something was affecting her and he could only guess it was the mysterious happenings of being a hybrid.

He needed to go help Carlisle.

And yet, he was un-able to force himself to leave Bella's side. He needed desperately to talk to her. So sort things out…but the timing had yet to be right. She was incredibly hurt and confused--about everything, who she was, what was going to happen to her—but she was also confused about them.

_Us._

He couldn't even begin to wonder what Bella was thinking now…about them. About him. _Don't make me any promises_…her words echoed around in his head and suddenly, her anger made sense.

_I left her._ _The way she is acting…she still has no clue why I really left. She still believes I didn't want her. That I grew tired…bored of her!_

The truth dawned on Edward and he couldn't help but smack a palm to his forehead.

Of course.

_Edward? We need you down here._

Alice was calling him, loudly. He'd been ignoring their voices before, but hers always was able to break through. He rolled his eyes slightly and then looked down at Bella. He leaned forward, tucking back a strand of hair from her face.

"I love you, my Bella. And when you wake up, it is time to talk," he whispered smiling at her peaceful face. He brushed his lips lightly over her forehead, watching as her lips turned up slightly in her slumber.

Edward's smile stuck as he reluctantly left his bedroom and followed the suddenly noisy clatter of sound.

"How is she doing?" asked Alice anxiously, as Edward entered the large dining room were Alice, Carlisle and Jasper were seated around the table.

"I don't know," replied Edward slowly, his smile disappearing, his face suddenly serious. He glanced over at Carlisle.

"She seems to get tired more and more frequently."

Carlisle nodded. "I think it's directly related to how much she eats. The more frequently she eats, the less she will sleep."

"Did you just find this out? What have I missed?" asked Edward quickly, glancing from Carlisle to Jasper. Jasper averted his eyes and glanced at Alice.

_I can't._

"You can't what, Jasper?" demanded Edward, not even noticing that Jasper had not spoken out loud. He narrowed his eyes but couldn't hear anything else from the tall blond vampire.

Carlisle nodded at Alice who finally looked Edward in the eyes.

"Jasper once met a hybrid," she said, her voice quiet, careful.

"What? When? Who—why didn't you say anything before?" Jasper winced slightly at Edward's tone.

"I wasn't sure if Bella—I didn't know for sure. The signs were there, but I wanted to talk to Carlisle before I said anything to you. Or Bella," said Jasper, his eyes not quite meeting Edward's. Edward still could not hear Jasper's thoughts and he knew he was keeping them carefully guarded.

_What doesn't he want me to see?_

"Do you not want me to know the story, Jasper?" he asked, trying to keep his voice level.

"There are some things, Edward, that you probably don't need to see. Gruesome stuff," broke in Carlisle. Alice watched Edward carefully, gauging his reactions. Edward's jaw clenched, but he waited patiently.

Jasper took a breath.

"It was during the time I spent fighting with Maria, creating and disposing of newborns almost weekly as we fought for control over Texas and Mexico. We had built up a larger army this time, for a battle against some very old vampires who had been in control of that section of Mexico for a long, long time. I didn't think we should. It felt wrong, but Maria was set and she was greedy for more power. We set to invade at night. We thought we were covered, thought we had enough newborns to fight. But what we didn't realize was that our enemies had a secret weapon…and they'd been waiting for an extremely long time to use him," Jasper paused.

Edward remained quiet, his eyes wide. He knew this was not going to be good.

"They had a hybrid. A hybrid who had fallen between worlds: he was neither human nor vampire, anymore. He had lost his mind. I didn't yet know any of that when we attacked that night. I didn't understand how one single vampire could kill so many newborns. We were completely decimated—only Maria and I made it out in one piece. The rest were lost to the hybrid. The following day, beaten and walking away, we ran into another fallen army. The leader, a man named West, told us of the hybrid. I 

recall my fascination. West knew little about the man who was stuck between worlds, but he had observed it before they had attempted to strike, a week before we had. He had learned that it was kept locked up tightly by the leaders. Not only was it dangerous to their enemies, it was also dangerous to them. West had also witnessed its feeding patterns. They fed it human food many times a day. But once a week, they would give it a freshly killed animal. The animal blood, West thought, dove it crazy…made it agitated. The human food, he thought, controlled it…allowed it to seem more normal, docile. West's army had attacked after a week of human food, right before it was fed the blood. They still lost," Jasper swallowed, his eyes daring to Alice. She nodded, encouragingly.

"I had witnessed the ferocity of the hybrid, but I don't think I ever quite believed that there could be such a being. Until, years later, years after I left Maria and close to when Alice found me, I met the hybrid again. I was outside of Philadelphia that night, looking for something to eat. I didn't see the hybrid until it was on me—it had no scent, just like Bella. I knew it was the same hybrid as the one in Mexico…it had the same dark eyes, the same crazed look. But it was weak. I wondered if it was dying. I didn't have any problem flipping it onto its back and holding it still. It has its eyes closed and it was moaning in pain, clutching its head…as though there was something in it, trying to get out.

"Make it stop," it had whispered. "Please, make it stop." I didn't know what to do. I tried to calm it down, get it to stop moaning, but it seemed my power had no affect on this hybrid. "Kill me," it whispered, it's dark eyes suddenly so clear…focusing on me like I was its only hope. I didn't know what to do. I sat there trying to talk to it…but before I could make a decision, a tall man, wearing this long red cape suddenly appeared before us. He smiled at me, his teeth so white, so--god, I was a vampire, yes--but his teeth were terrifying, I literally found myself fearing for my life. "Thank you for helping my…friend," he had said, "he is not…well." I had backed away. The man in the red cape leaned over the hybrid, yanked him up and they walked away, "Home," he had said to me over his shoulder, "It's time for us to go home," and then he laughed. It was the most frightening noise. They disappeared before I could move again," Jasper shuttered at his memory.

"I realized a moment later, he was one of the Volturi, Maria had told me all about them and at one old house in Mexico, we had come across pictures of the family. Carlisle tells me this man was Nathaniel."

Edward, feeling horrified, glanced over at Carlisle, who was nodding.

"Is this hybrid still alive?" he asked, his throat dry.

"I have many reasons to believe that no, he is not," replied Carlisle.

Edward swallowed hard.

"The man whom Jasper met lived in Italy not long before I did. I never found out what he did, but it was said he betrayed the Volturi beyond forgiveness. Nathaniel was ordered to turn him into hybrid…he was then sent away from Italy. I never did know what happened to this man, but Jasper's story ads up to what I knew of him. Nathaniel was probably sent to Philadelphia to kill him, finally. Perhaps he was close to giving the Volturi away, I don't know," Carlisle mused.

"I don't understand…why Bella? What has she done? Why would the Volturi send Nathaniel here to turn her into a hybrid?" Edward's voice shook slightly.

"I can't answer those questions yet, Edward. But I don't think this was anything the Volturi ordered. I believe that Nathaniel acted of his own will. I just cannot fathom why he would do this."

"Whatcan we do now, Carlisle?" asked Alice softly, placing a hand on Edward's arm. Edward stared silently out the bay window.

_What's going to happen to you, Bella?_

"I should go check on her," he said. Alice heard the desperation in his voice and looked pointedly at Jasper, who nodded subtly.

"I'll go. You stay. Relax for a moment," she said, disappearing before he could respond. Edward found himself doing exactly that, completely against his will. He glared at Jasper.

"You need this, man. Just stay put for a minute. Alice will make sure she's okay."

Edward sat back, folding his arms across his chest.

"Alice asked what we can do now. I think we need to--"

…_before Edward finds out._

Edward perked up at his name. It was Alice's mental voice.

"Finds out what?" he asked out loud.

"Edward?" asked Carlisle, confused.

"Alice!" he yelled, his heart racing, tearing up the stairs, ignoring Jasper and Carlisle behind him. He threw open his bedroom door so hard, it flew off its hinges and landed a few feet down the hall.

He stopped dead.

Bella was gone. There was no Alice to be seen.

The dark curtains fluttered in the breeze, the window open. Edward found himself leaning out.

"Bella? Alice!"

But they were both gone.

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**A/N- I'm sorry--I know it's been awhile since I've posted. Wanna hear my excuses? Didn't think so! I'm trying to work out a schedule to stick to for this new school semester that will allow me more writing time. So bare with me! Thank you for the continuously awesome reviews and thanks for sticking with my story. I've still got alot to get out! Also, I realize this chapter is a bit un-polished. I'll go back and edit when I've got more time, but I really wanted to get it out for you guys :)**

**Please leave me some love after you finish the chapter and I promise I'll get the next chapter out much more quickly!**


	16. Chapter 15 Goodbye to You

**Chapter Fifteen- Goodbye to You**

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Bella glanced around quickly as she gathered all her strength beneath her. In one fluid motion, she sprung upwards, successfully scaling the two story brick wall in front of her. She smiled humorlessly and reached to un-latch the window, cringing slightly, anticipating the creaking of the window.

To her vague surprise though, the hinges remained silent and squeak-free. With one last look over her shoulder, Bella swung herself lithely through the window, landing next to her bed.

Her bed. Her room. She breathed in the familiar scent, thankful for the familiarity. She glanced around, realizing that everything seemed frozen in time. Nothing had moved, nothing had been cleaned or changed. Or moved. A discarded t-shirt was draped over her chair. A pair of rumpled jeans lay on the floor next to her bed. Her laundry hamper was over-flowing. Her bed was made; though hastily, as though someone had been in a hurry.

_Because __**I **__was in a hurry. I was on my way to Jacob's that morning…so excited to jump, so excited at the prospect of hearing Edward's voice again._

Nothing in her room had changed since the day she had supposedly died. Bella's heart ached for what Charlie must be going through. She wondered if anyone had been allowed into her room since her "death". Bella tip-toed across the room to her bedroom door, realizing quickly that there was no need to be quiet. Her new body, her new walk…was just naturally quiet, graceful almost.

She opened her door softly and peeked her head out. She wasn't sure why she felt like an intruder in her own house—but she did, and she continued to make her way slowly down the upstairs hallway, pausing momentarily at Charlie's bedroom door. His snoring had never been earth-shatteringly loud; but Bella's new sense of hearing told her brain a different story. The noise blared through her head loudly, but as she opened his door carefully, it quieted until all she heard was his even breathing.

Bella approached his bed, her eyes filled with unshed tears. She leaned over, watching her dad sleep, his eyeballs shifting around quickly under his lids.

_He's dreaming. _

Bella closed her eyes, hoping his dreams were filled with happy images. She conjured up an image in her head, of Charlie taking her out fishing. She wished so badly she had gone fishing with him, just once. He had never asked her to go with him on any of his early morning expeditions, but she knew how much it would have meant to him if she had. A silent tear zigzagged down her cheek as she held the image of Charlie showing her how to thread a worm onto a fishing rod, her "dream face" scrunching up in playful disgust, as Charlie laughed, paddling them out into the middle of the lake.

Bella opened her eyes and the image disappeared…but as she sank to her knees beside her father's bed, she saw him smile slightly in his sleep.

"Bella," he muttered gruffly, turning slightly in his bed.

Bella ducked down quickly, her small figure hidden by the bed. She knew the danger of the situation. There was no way she could let Charlie see her. When his breathing leveled and Bella knew he was safely lost inside his dreams, she climbed back to her knees, examining her dad's face—memorizing the angles of his face; the wrinkles, creases and shape.

Her heart ached for what she would have to do to Charlie. She knew she couldn't let him think she was alive anymore. Somehow, she would have to get the point across that Bella Swan, human Bella, was dead and would never be back. She would have to provide tangible proof—without it, Charlie would not rest. She knew he would spend his life searching for her, never giving up on her…but in the process, he would be giving up on his own life. Bella couldn't have that. She needed Charlie to move on, to pick up the pieces and continue living. Renee, Bella had always known, would be okay—she had Phil. But Human Bella's death would consume Charlie if she didn't do anything about it. Without Jacob's help, it wouldn't be as easy. She had counted on him to help her with Charlie, to be there for him. To make sure he accepted her fate.

Bella shrugged slightly. She would have to make this work. She just wasn't quite sure what "this" was yet, though an idea was starting to form. Bella touched Charlie's cheek tenderly. She watched as he shivered slightly. Bella pulled her hand away quickly, staring at her fingers angrily.

She couldn't even say good-bye properly.

Bella stood up, brushing away a tear. She pulled Charlie's quilt up further and then turned, quickly striding to his door—trying to ignore the rebellious feeling bubbling up inside her. She shut the door behind her firmly, taking several deep breaths on the other side.

One word, one quick shake and she could talk to him again. She could stay with him. She could be Bella again. She could be alive and laughing.

Her hand twitched back towards Charlie's bedroom door, grasping the sleek doorknob—clenching it until her knuckles turned white.

_I could get it all back._

"Bella." A whisper, barely. But she heard it and her head turned, her hand loosening slightly on the door knob.

A figure stood at the end of the hallway, near her bedroom door.

"Alice?" she choked. She griped Charlie's door knob again, harder.

"Bella. I know you want to. But you can't. You can't, Bella," she whispered, taking a step closer to her friend.

"I can. I can and everything will go back to normal," replied Bella defiantly, her eyes on Alice's tiny figure, stepping closer.

"You know that's not true, Bella. You're not human anymore. This would only hurt Charlie more, Bella," replied Alice, her musical voice calm, steady.

"I'm not human. But I'm not vampire either, Alice—does that mean staying around you…around Ed…around your family--will only hurt more too?" she challenged.

"No," responded Alice firmly, without a second's hesitation.

"Why not?" demanded Bella, her voice rising slightly. Alice listened to Charlie's breathing, taking a moment before answering.

"Because you _are_ one of us, Bella. You have entered into our world—not the way any of us had thought, not the way you were supposed to…but that doesn't matter Bella. Look at yourself. Look what you can do. I saw you scale the wall up to your window, Bella. Edward told us what you did to save his life. You're one of us and we love you. We love you so much, we're going to help you. We're going to fix you and we're not going to let anyone hurt you, Bella," Alice watched silently as tears dropped from Bella's face to her dirty shirt. "You can no longer be part of Charlie's world and I know you know that. I know it's hard, but you've got to let him go. It's too dangerous…and I don't have to see the future to know it won't end up well for Charlie," Alice stopped in front of Bella.

"I know. I know you're right," Bella's hand loosened and fell away from the doorknob, her body slumping slightly, looking defeated. Alice took her friend gently in her arms and hugged her tightly.

"I'm just so scared, Alice. I'm so scared," she whispered, as Alice smoothed her hair back from her face.

"I am too, Bella. I'm not going to lie. But we're going to get through this. You are not alone."

Bella sniffed and pulled back from Alice, a small smile on her beautiful face.

"I kinda stink, don't I?" she asked, glancing down at the blue shirt she'd been wearing for the last week.

Alice took Bella's hand and led her back down the hall to her bedroom.

"I have no idea. But I bet you do. That shirt looks like it has seen better days," Alice made a face and Bella laughed softly, surveying her room.

"He'd notice if something disappeared," Bella whispered sadly.

"Just leave it. Plus, I think we should let Human Bella's clothes die with Human Bella. I've got tons of clothes back home. Clothes that are…how shall I say this…stylish," Bella took in Alice wrinkled nose and laughed again, hugging her friend gratefully.

"I missed you so much, Alice," grinned Bella, as she sat in the window sill dangling her legs towards the ground, ten feet down. She got ready to jump and then stopped, suddenly curious.

"How did you know I was here…you can't smell me."

"I followed you," replied Alice, slightly sheepishly. "I went to check on you right after you snuck out the window, you little brat. Why couldn't you just use the door, anyways?"

"I was just going to be a few minutes. And I didn't want to worry you guys. I was going to be right back," replied Bella, ignoring Alice's pointed look at her delicate watch. The hour, Bella knew, was very late. She had been gone much longer than she had anticipated…and perhaps would not have come back had Alice not intervened.

"I'm sure Edward's freaking out," spoke Alice softly, her eyes on Bella's face. "He probably thinks I kidnapped you or something. I'm sure when he got up to his room and saw us both missing he thought I was up to something. God knows what though…" she trailed off in frustration.

"You can't see anything?" Bella asked, her eyes suddenly worried, repressing the flood of memories of Edward's kisses before they consumed her. She had done well at tucking them away, but the dam threatened to bust at every opportunity. She was working hard to not think about him.

"Not when you're around," answered Alice, throwing an annoyed glance at Bella. Bella jumped quickly to the ground, where Alice joined her a second later.

"Like, if I'm next to you? Or near-by? Or the same state?" Bella asked as the two threaded their way carefully around the large pines in the forest behind the Swan's residence. They walked at a normal human pace, neither in a hurry to get back—for the same reason—they both were afraid of Edward's reaction to Bella's disappearance.

"I don't know. Definitely not when you're beside or near me. I think it's something we're going to have to test out. I think we have a lot to test out in regards to you, Bella. Like, what the hell where you doing when you saved Edward? You were actually able to hold back Victoria and Chase? And Edward said that Chase had the power to hold him immobile. But you were able to break out of that…what else can you do, Bella Swan?" Alice's enthusiasm bubbled up as she turned to look at Bella with excitement.

Bella laughed.

"I have no idea, Alice. I think I'm breaking all the rules," she responded.

"I think that's kinda what hybrids are all about," Alice added, her voice thoughtful. Bella remained quiet, hating the word with every fiber in her body.

"I don't think you're all that bad off, you know," spoke Alice, who seemed to be aware of the meaning behind Bella's silence.

"Really…you don't?" Bella asked, dryly.

"Really. You have all this crazy power. We don't even know what else you can do, but you've already proved to be able to block other vampires' powers. And you don't even know how to use them yet! I bet with some help from Carlisle, we could find out exactly what you can do!" The excitement that she was feeling ran into her voice again, and she was suddenly bouncing up and down, her eyes full of thoughts.

"If the Volturi ever tried to bother you, you'd be able to hold them all back! No one would be able to touch you!"

"We don't know that, Alice. And I really don't want to find out," Bella shuttered at the image she had concocted of the Volturi. It was not a happy, friendly one.

As the Cullen house came into view, the two paused to listen to the voices inside. Everyone was accounted for except Edward. Bella felt worry crease her face as they hurried to the door and slipped inside.

"Alice! Bella! Thank god!" Esme grabbed them both in a hug and sighed a breath of relief. She grabbed her cell phone quickly; her eyes glued to Alice's face and dialed a number.

"Edward, come home. They're fine. They're here."

Bella averted Esme's eyes as Alice quickly explained that they had never been in any danger. They had just made a visit to see Charlie.

Alice retreated to Jasper's arms and Bella tried to ignore his whispered worry. He had been scared when she had left without a word. But he also trusted her. Bella could feel his relief from where she awkwardly stood.

It was only a moment later that Edward slammed through the front door. Bella had taken a seat on the plush couch and as he entered the room, she saw his eyes frantically search the room until they found her face.

As he took her in, she did the same. Her guilt increased when she noticed, for the first time, the large dark swollen circles under his eyes. The dark color almost matched the darkness of his eyes…he hadn't eaten in days, Bella figured, her worry deepening. She also noted his appearance. She had never seen him look less than one-hundred percent put-together. But today, tonight—this early morning, his clothes were rumbled, his copper hair wild.

_Have I caused this?_ She wondered.

"Bella," Relief. His eyes met hers firmly, "Bella."

Bella stood up in answer. There was no more avoiding this. She could see it in his eyes.

It was time. She had been dreading this since she had been up in that tree. No, since before that. Since Victoria—or was it Nathaniel?—had turned her into a vampire. She had known that someday she would see Edward again and this moment would come.

The moment when he told her why exactly she could never be more than a friend to him. Sure, she hadn't ever thought he would slip up and kiss her the way he had—_don't think about that!_—but the talk was unavoidable and she did not feel ready.

But he apparently was. And as she followed him back upstairs and to his bedroom, she wondered why he had to do it so close to his bed. All she wanted to do was wrap her arms around him, pull him onto the bed and hibernate with him in her arms forever.

_Is that too much to ask?_

With dread coursing through her veins, Bella turned to Edward, prepared for the worst.

**A/N: You guys seriously rock. I had a total case of the Monday's today...but all your sweet comments have made me feel much better! Thank you, thank you for all the awesome reviews. I love the story too, and look forward to writing (and posting it!) every few days/week.**

**Tell me: what do you hope to see more of? What are you liking/disliking about the story? What would you LIKE to happen?**

**Thanks for your feedback, it's incredibly valuable to me :D **


	17. Chapter 16 Crawl inside my head with me

Chapter 16-**Crawl inside my head with me**

* * *

She took a breath and turned to Edward.

"I know what you're going to say," she muttered, not looking at him. "And you don't have to do this. I already know what you're going to say," she repeated, staring at the wall beside Edward's shoulder. She saw him shift slightly, so that she was looking directly at his face. She stared at his jaw.

"Well, that takes the fun out of it," he replied, his voice gruff. Bella lifted her eyes from his strong jaw up to his dark shadowed eyes.

"What?" she asked, pain stabbing through her body. She quickly fixed her face so that he couldn't see the flash of pain.

"I love you so much, Bella Swan," he answered, choking on emotion, his voice breaking slightly.

Bella swallowed, her eyes widening slightly. She looked for some words…even a sound or two would suffice—but she couldn't find a thing. She continued to stare at his eyes; two dark pools of anticipation.

Edward chuckled softly at her expression but didn't make a move to approach her as she sat back silently on his desk chair.

"From your expression, you may have not seen that one coming. Neither did I, actually. I was going to save that part for last," he said softly, leaning against the wall behind him. He wanted so badly to grab her into his arms, to kiss her all over—but he knew it wasn't time. He unclenched his fists, trying to maintain his distance.

Bella tilted her head slightly, her mind in high speed. But no, she still couldn't comprehend the words that had escaped his mouth. She shook her head slightly.

"Uhm…what?"

_Brilliant, Swan._

But she didn't have time to chastise herself too much about how she sounded.

"Bella. I left you all those months ago not because I didn't want you, not because I was bored of you, but because I didn't think it was safe for us to be together. Bella, I left you because I love you. I love you more than anything. More than my own happiness. It killed me to leave you, pardon the pun, to know that I would never see you again was…well, it was bad," Edward let the words slide from his mouth, his heart taking over.

Bella continued to sit in silence, her brain struggling to digest his words. She turned her face slightly to look at his face. He…_loved_ her? But--

"But…no," she shook her head, confused.

"No?" repeated Edward uncertainly, his fists clenched again, his jaw tight.

"You don't leave the person you love," she responded, wrapping her arms around her body protectively. "If you loved me, you would not have left me," she said simply, her eyes suddenly un-readable. Edward felt frantic.

"Bella, no. I thought—I thought it was the best thing for you. I saw how I was constantly putting your life in danger. Victoria, James…hell, even my own family. Being with me meant a certain death for you. I couldn't have that."

Bella laughed humorlessly.

"And look how well that turned out. Being without you also meant a ceratin death, Edward."

"I didn't think—I didn't know that would happen. I thought I had tracked Victoria south. I thought you were safe. I had no idea her bond with James was that strong. If I'd known—"

"What? If you'd known, what would you have done? Come back, killed Victoria and then left again, 'because you love me?' I barely survived after you left, Edward. I shut down, I turned into a zombie. I thought I had everyone fooled, I thought they all thought I was okay, but I was a mess. I was so broken, Edward, so.."

"I know," whispered Edward, his voice cracking. "Jacob showed me. I—I thought you'd be able to move on. I knew it would be hard for awhile, but I honestly thought time would heal your human heart."

"You saw Jake? When?"

"After the funeral. I saw you in his thoughts. He showed me how—God, Bella. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," Edward took a step closer to Bella, his black eyes filled with pain.

Bella took a breath, fighting the muscles in her body to stay seated.

"I hurt you. Perhaps I don't deserve a moment more of your time, Bella. But I need you to know that I never intended for it to be like this. I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought it was what would make you happy in the long run."

"You knew what made me happy. You promised me you would stay," Bella felt her brave mask slowly slipping from her face. She renewed her efforts to keep it in place.

_Just a little longer._

"I knew you thought I made you happy. At least, for that moment. But Bella, I mistakenly and very unfairly didn't put as much faith in what you thought. I was stupid. I didn't think there was any way that a girl of eighteen could know herself that well—or what would make her happy in the long run," Edward smiled wryly. "I promised you I would stay as long as it was best for you. The moment I decided it was no longer best, I made up my mind."

"What wasn't fair to me. You're not my father, Edward. We were in a relationship and part of being in a relationship is talking things through and making decisions together," Bella responded.

"In any normal relationship, yes. Or at least, so I hear. I—I made a terrible mistake by leaving your side, Bella, and now I will have to live with the consequences for the rest of my life—however long that may be. I just need you to understand the err of my ways. I don't want you to think that I abandoned you because I was bored…or because I no longer loved you, Bella."

Bella looked down at the plush beige carpet. She dug her toe into the soft fabric.

She had a lot to think about.

She knew she should feel happy, relieved, elated! But she couldn't shrug off the feeling of betrayal. Abandonment.

"Edward," she started slowly. Edward's silent heart sunk in his chest. She wasn't jumping into his arms like he had imagined. "When I needed you most, you weren't there. You left me feeling miserably un-loved. You took everything I'd had of you and I felt like--like I was going crazy."

_And then there were the voices, but we'll leave that for another time._

Edward opened his mouth as thought to say something, but Bella held up her hand.

"Just let me…I need some time, Edward. This is all…I'd been under the impression that you left me because you didn't want me anymore. I believed that for months. I had started to accept that. And now, I learn that you left me because you love me. In my mind, that doesn't yet equate—I feel like, if you loved me, really loved me, there is no way you would have been able to leave me alone. No matter how selfish you thought you were being. I think…well, it's going to take some time for me to wrap my head around this."

Edward let out a breath and his head bowed, feeling defeated. But he knew not to push.

"I understand. And I respect your decision, Bella." Edward took another step forward. "But Bella, know this: you are everything to me. It pains me to see you like this. To know that I've hurt you so much, that you find you can't trust me. I realize I deserve nothing less than that, Bella, I do. I had underestimated your heart, Bella," Edward ran hand through his copper hair. Bella fought the urge to run to him, but twine her hands in that gorgeous messy hair of his and never let go. Ever.

But she remained seated.

_Underestimated your heart. _He understood.

"I want to take this slow, Edward," she whispered, her hand leaving the safety of her body and reaching out towards him. Edward stared at her hand and then stared at her, astonishment in his eyes.

"Does that mean…?" he reached for her hand slowly, afraid he would scare her if he made any sudden movements.

"I want you Edward. I want us. I'm just…I don't know if—"

"Shhhh. That's all I need right now, Bella. That's all I need," Edward took Bella's hand in his, sunk to his knees and put her hand to his lips.

"Slowly," he murmured, trailing his lips from her wrist, across her palm and up to her tiny, pale pinky finger. He kissed it delicately and moved onto her ring finger. He kissed each of her fingers softly, but his black eyes never left her bright chocolate ones.

Bella pressed her lips together, suppressing the mounting passion she was feeling. She pulled her hand away slowly, as Edward gazed at her, his love for her shinning through.

Bella cleared her throat. Edward straightened up.

"I guess I should…go see if Carlisle has come up with anything more," Edward looked at Bella, his eyes turning sad as he started to turn towards the door. "Would you like to stay here and rest? You've had one hell of a long day. Night?…what time is it, anyway?"

"I have no idea," Bella responded, a laugh escaping.

"You're going to be okay, Bella," said Edward, stopping in the door.

"You really believe that?"

"We're with you all the way, love. We're not leaving you this time. You're stuck with us forever," Edward smiled and winked at her, then turned and started away.

_Underestimated your heart._

_He loves you, Bella! He didn't leave you because he stopped loving you..._

Bella jumped up from the chair, causing it to topple over backwards.

"Edward," she said his name softly, but her voice turned him around quickly. Before he could focus on the figure in his chair, he was suddenly knocked backwards and against the hallway wall by a force so strong, he knew the wall behind him was dented.

But he barely noticed.

Bella had wrapped her arms around his neck so tightly. And finally, finally he could feel his Bella in his arms. He hugged her back with everything he had, his eyes closed. He buried his head in her hair and breathed a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

She was back. And she was going to be okay. _They_ were going to be okay.

After a minute, she pulled back to look at his eyes. He kissed her forehead carefully, tenderly. Bella reached up and put a small hand to his face.

"By the way, I love you too," she whispered.

Edward felt a wide smile spread across his face as he leaned down to kiss her gently on her soft, full lips.

"Bella," he whispered into her lips as they met again, more hungrily this time.

"Slow," she reminded him. But he didn't mind. Her mask was gone and for the first time, he could see his Bella—she had come back.

"Slow," he agreed, brushing back a stray hair and tracing her jaw line with a finger.

They both ignored Emmett as he moved past them loudly.

"Get a room!"

Bella broke away, giggling, feeling lighter then she had in months.

"Speaking of getting a room…I think I'm going to find a shower and live in it for a good, long while."

Edward squeezed her hand and nodded.

"I'll go tell Alice to find you some clothes," he replied.

"What, you don't like the grunge look?" grinned Bella, motioning to her obviously dirty shirt.

"Only on you. But I thought you might want something less…holey," Edward stuck a finger through a hole in the side of Bella's shirt. He managed to tickle her skin before she jumped away shrieking.

"Still…ticklish!" she got out, tears forming quickly in her eyes. Edward shot her an expression of innocence as he ushered her back to his room.

"Full shower and tub service," he announced, guiding her through into his full marble bathroom. "Shampoo, soap, even one of those oompa-loompa things,"

"Oompa-loompa? I hope not, those things creep me out," Bella laughed and peeked into the shower.

"Oh thank god," she said, feigning relief, grabbing the sponge, "A luffa!"

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Alice put it in there. It's never been used," he said.

"Okay. Well, thanks. I guess I'll get scrubbing. See you in a couple weeks!" she said, as Edward went to the door.

"Let me know if you need any help," he grinned mischievously as he shut the door. Bella laughed as she stripped off her jeans and shirt. She turned on the water and cranked it hot, wondering if her chilly skin would care what temperature the water was.

The answer, it seemed, was no. As the water fell down her body, she slowly felt herself relaxing. She felt good. She felt more like her old Bella self, and yet she couldn't forget who she now was. Her worries and concerns were far different than they had been only a couple weeks ago.

Now, she had to figure out a way to convince her father that she was dead. Even bigger than that, was figuring out what the hell she even _was._ And why this Nathaniel had changed her…what had she, or perhaps the Cullen's, done to upset him or the Volturi? Or did Victoria convince him to change her? And what, most importantly, was she? What could she do? What was going to happen to her?

Bella sighed and rinsed her hair, inhaling the smell of the fruit-infused shampoo. She wanted to be worried, she really did. But the more relaxed she grew, the less concerned she was and the more her thoughts strayed and held to Edward.

She knew she had some thinking to do. She had to sort through her thoughts and feelings at some point. But right now, she was just content to feel so suddenly and unexpectedly…

happy.

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**Reviews make me happy! They also inspire me to write faster :D You all continue to be awesome...thank you!**


	18. Chapter 17 The Last Time

**A/N: I just want to preface this chapter with a quick comment: I originally wrote this chapter to be funny and light, but it seriously was not doing it for me and the tone the story was kinda getting lost.**

**By the way, I write Bella and Jacob as though there will never, ever be a Nessie :)**

* * *

Chapter 17- The Last Time

Jacob took a deep breath. He knew what he had to do and it wasn't going to be easy. But he promised her. And he wasn't going to disappoint her again. He slipped the baseball cap from his head and gripped it tightly in one hand. His other hand shook violently, but he forced it up to the door and knocked. Lightly at first, and then louder and louder, his desperation turning inside-out.

As the heavy oak door pulled back, Jacob's breath caught in his throat. Charlie Swan's eyes filled with hope at the sight of him.

Expectation. Just not the right kind.

"Jake..?"

_I can't do this, I can't do this. Screw promises. I can't be part of this, I can't do this to Charlie._

Jacob took a step back, hesitating.

But he knew. He knew this was the only way, Bella was right. Charlie had to move on.

_And so do you, Jake._

"Jake?" Concern tinged Charlie's voice, he took a step forward and then froze at the change in Jacob's face--the sudden set of his jaw.

"Charlie," he said quietly. Too quiet. He cleared his throat. "Charlie. Bella. We—she washed up near First Beach. I'm sorry. She's…she really is…de—she's gone," the words tumbled out as Jacob stared at Charlie's face. He watched the man's face crumble slowly. His shoulders sagged, his mouth quivered. The wrinkles in his middle-aged face suddenly seemed to deepen. And then, as Jacob continued to watch, Charlie Swan pulled himself together. His spine straightened and his mouth hardened into a thin line.

"Her body. I need to see her body," he stated, his voice taking on a business-like tone.

Jacob nodded swiftly. Bella had been right. She knew her dad well.

"She's…well, she's at my house. We brought her from the shore to my place," he revealed, wondering if Charlie would pick up on how weird that was. He hoped he wouldn't ask who "we" was—that part had just kind of slipped out.

"Let's go," he said quietly, closing the oak door softly behind him. Details, it seemed, were not on his mind today.

Jacob nodded again and led Chief Swan to his rabbit.

_You better be ready, Bella._

* * *

_10 hours before…_

Freshly clothed and clean, Bella was feeling better than she had since she was turned. She was so relaxed--that as she sat at the Cullen's dining room table, she was barely able to focus on the conversation around her. Instead, she shyly snuck glances across the table at Edward, who had not been able to take his eyes off of her. She felt slightly giddy as their eyes met again and held. Edward smiled at her and it was like the room lit up. If she could blush, surely she would be the color of a ripe tomato.

_He is everything to me_, she knew this, and yet, the thought still frightened her. Her heart ached slightly, an old wound remembering. A scar; not fully healed.

Carlisle, Esme, Jasper and Alice were discussing her in some capacity or another, but she felt too unconcerned to care at the moment. That is, until she heard the key-word.

_Charlie._

She quickly tuned back in.

"Someone is going to see one of us eventually," Jasper was saying. "We're going to have to leave soon, or suffer the consequences."

"If word gets back to Charlie that one of the Cullen's are in town, he will be more than just a little suspicious. In fact, I'm sure he already has a feeling in the back of his mind that Bella's 'disappearance' has to do with us, somehow," Carlisle glanced at Edward who quickly confirmed the doctor's thoughts.

"He does. He has plenty of crazy theories and I'm the main player in most of them," Edward cringed slightly, recalling some of the more dramatic--and frighteningly close to the truth--theories.

"I've been thinking about this for awhile," started Bella slowly. All eyes swung to Bella's face in surprise.

"We're going to have to fake my death. Charlie is going to need evidence that I'm gone. Before we leave. He won't rest until he's sure I really am dead."

"She's right. Charlie will dedicate his life to finding Bella. He needs proof she's gone," Esme piped up solemnly.

"But how?" wondered Alice, glaring slightly at Bella. Bella glanced back apologetically, knowing it must be incredibly frustrating to not _see_ how.

"He needs to see my dead body," she said firmly, her eyes on Edward. Edward looked back at her for a silent moment and then nodded.

"It could work," he muttered, his mind racing.

"We're going to need help," said Jasper, nodding, "This can work, but we will need help, someone who can-"

"Jacob," said Alice with a smile.

"You saw something?" whispered Bella.

"No. But he's the only way. And he'll do it," she stated.

"Alice, I don't think Jake wants any part of me anymore," she said softly. "And he certainly doesn't want to help me hurt Charlie," she added.

"He'll help. He has to," she answered, glancing at Edward. Edward nodded.

"He will," responded Edward, his assurance edged with a threat.

"Now Bella, do you think you can pull of being dead for as much as a few hours?" asked Carlisle.

"How hard can it be?" she asked with a small, shaky laugh. "My heart already doesn't beat. My skin won't give me away," she stretched out a hand to examine her chalky white arm.

"You almost look the part," agreed Carlisle. "And it shouldn't be hard to stay completely still. It's what we naturally do anyways. Your eyes though, will want to blink. I've noticed this about you, Bella. As a hybrid, you naturally blink, like humans. You must keep your eyes open, but you cannot blink."

Bella swallowed nervously but nodded.

"Esme will help you prepare. You're going to have to put your old clothes back on."

Bella wrinkled her nose.

"Will he wonder why I don't…smell?"

"I'm not sure that you don't smell—at least, to humans," admitted Carlisle. "Most likely, he will be too upset to notice. But we'll take precautions, just in case,"

"Where…where will we have Charlie see her? I mean, obviously we can't bring her to the morgue," Edward grimaced at the very thought of his Bella laying on display in a room of strangers set on poking and prodding her.

"Alice, Jasper, go find Jacob. I have a feeling that once you're away from Bella, you will be able to help us figure this out," Carlisle said, his eyes on Alice's small face.

Alice jumped up in excitement, the idea of being able to "see" again lighting up her face.

They left quickly, Bella watching helplessly after them. Edward reached across the table and took Bella's hand.

"This is going to work," he said, his eyes securely on her own. Bella gazed at him for a second and then reached out with her other hand to touch the dark circles under his eyes.

"You need to eat," she said simply, her thumb tracing the circle. Edward grimaced, but held her hand to his face.

"I know. But there just isn't time," he replied.

"There's time. Edward, go hunt, quickly and close to home," said Carlisle. "Bella needs some time to get ready, anyhow."

Edward glanced back to Bella, worry in his eyes.

"I'm not going anywhere," she said with a smile.

"No sneaking out windows?" he asked, squeezing her hand.

"Not tonight," she replied, her smile widening.

Edward let go of her hand and sat up reluctantly, torn between wanting to stay with Bella and the hunger that was screaming at him.

"I'll be right back," he decided, touching the top of Bella's head with his palm. Bella noticed Carlisle and Esme exchange a smile.

Bella followed Esme upstairs to "de-beautify" Bella, as she laughingly put it. She slipped her old clothes back on and allowed Esme to "style" her hair—which meant coax it into a limp, knotty mess.

"It has to look like you've been floating around in the water for days," she said confidently.

"Speaking of, if I really had been floating around for that long, wouldn't my body be all…bloated?"

Esme paused for a second, her expression grim.

"We're not going to let it get to the point of anyone noticing," she responded, immediately piquing Bella's curiosity. It sounded like they already had formulated a plan.

When Esme put the finishing touches on Bella's hair, Bella turned to check herself out in the mirror. And she couldn't help but feel confident.

"Move over Miss Teen Forks, there's another beauty queen in town," joked Bella.

She looked—well, she looked dead.

_Now all I have to do is not move. Maybe I should go practice, or something._

Just as Esme and Bella headed back downstairs, Jasper burst in.

"Jacob is in," he said proudly.

"What?" Bella couldn't believe it. How did they convince him?

"He's going to help. Alice saw the outcome. It's going to work," Jasper's smile was contagious; Bella found herself smiling uncertainly back at him.

"Where are we doing this?" asked Carlisle quickly.

"Alice thinks the reservation. Of course, when the wolves are involved, she's blinded. But it makes perfect sense. We'll have Bella's body at Jacob's place. He says his father wouldn't want anything to do with this, but he'll stay out of it. We have the treaty lines though. Bella, you'll be on your own,"

Bella took a breath.

So it was set then. The rest was up to her.

* * *

It wasn't the stillness that bothered her, not the lack of blinking. It was hearing everything around her, but not responding. It was unsettling.

Charlie had bought it. He had collapsed and cried and held her. Though she tried not to remember most of it, Bella took comfort in feeling her father one last time, even if she couldn't hold him back.

He didn't question a thing. The hardest part had been when Jacob told him the coroner was coming to get her body—and Charlie hadn't wanted to leave until she was officially gone. For a moment, Bella was afraid they'd be sitting there all day, waiting for someone that was never going to show up. Or worse, she worried that Charlie would call the coroner himself and she would actually have to go the morgue. She did not want her body sliced open, though Edward had assured her he wouldn't let anything happen to her. She wouldn't leave the reservation. Bella wasn't sure how he was going to enforce that promise, but she had to hold onto that.

But finally, Jacob talked Charlie into going home and getting some rest.

"I'll take care of the rest, Charlie," he said sadly.

"Jake, I'm sorry, This must be a blow to you too," said Charlie as he got into Jacob's rabbit. Jacob was planning on picking it up later. "I know how much you loved her."

Jacob nodded, tears welling up in his eyes as he stared at his dirty shoe.

"She loved you too, you know. You were her best friend. You fixed her heart, Jake. Don't you forget that," he said, starting up the engine, his gruff voice fading.

Jacob nodded and waved as Charlie took off.

He let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. And then he took another.

_One Swan down, one to go_, he thought grimly, closing his eyes briefly. But he was in a hurry to get back to his house—to make sure Bella was really still alive. The Cullen's had done almost too good a job…he was convinced they had actually murdered her. She was so believably dead.

Jacob sprinted back to his house and entered the front door as Bella sat up from the couch.

"Jake," she whispered, "thank you. I know you didn't want to do that. I know how hard it was. Thank you."

"I think I have the heebie-jeebies," replied Jacob, sinking down on the couch next to Bella. "That was really creepy, seeing you dead. And the Oscar goes to…Bella Swan," he muttered, elbowing her in the side. Bella ran a hand threw her tangled hair, frowning.

"And you're welcome. I'm sorry about…about last time. I was pissed off. I still am. But I know Charlie needed that. Guess I needed it too," he added grudgingly.

Bella nodded.

"How did Alice convince you?"

Jacob rolled his eyes.

"That girl has a way with words," is all he would say. Bella made a mental note to ask Alice about it later. "But Bella, I would have come around eventually, Alice or no Alice. You're you, Bells. I don't care that you've changed. You're still you and I'm still me."

Bella turned to her friend, her face serious.

"Did Alice tell you we're leaving?"

"Yeah, she mentioned that. Do you know where you're going to be?"

"I don't know. The Cullen's have been talking about different places; Chicago, Alaska, Vancouver. But I don't know if they've decided. To me, it really doesn't matter. Wherever the world will be safe from me, I guess," replied Bella, smiling slightly.

"Will I be able to still see you? I mean, sometimes? Make sure they haven't eaten you or anything?" he asked nonchalantly, his eyes on his hands.

"Jake…I don't know how long I'll be…me. But as long as I am, I would love for you to visit. As long as…it's okay with you," she replied, suddenly feeling shy.

"The vampire doctor will fix you. Alice seemed pretty sure that you'd be okay. I'm going to miss you, Bells. And if you do start going loopy, make sure your Cullen bloodsucker comes to get me. I'll be able to remind you who you are," said Jacob a bit shakey.

Bella put her hand on Jacob's shoulder, her eyes wet. Jacob averted his eyes. He did not want to start crying in front of Bella.

"We should probably call the Cullen's and let 'em know everything worked," said Jacob, starting to pull out his cell phone.

"Wait, Jake," Bella squeezed his shoulder slightly, causing him to look at her.

"I'm going to miss you. And Charlie is right, you know. You are my best friend and you did make me whole again," tears streamed down Bella's cheeks.

Jacob's arms found their way around her shoulders and Bella hugged him back fiercely.

"You can still cry," he marveled, his voice soft in her ear.

"I love you, Jake," she said, feeling her tears mingle with his own.

"I know," he whispered, "I know."

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	19. Chapter 18 Sleeping to Dream

Chapter Eighteen-Sleeping to Dream

* * *

_Day Ten_

_Isabella Swan's abilities seem to be increasing as time passes. We are in the tenth day of testing and we are still discovering new abilities. Today, for instance, Bella surprised herself when she momentarily held Emmett back from attacking her. That is not the surprising part; Bella can hold any and all of us away from her, as discovered on day two. As she held an extremely helpless Emmett at arm's length, we had Edward attack from the other side, without Bella's prior knowledge. Edward was able to tackle Bella, causing her to lose her hold on Emmett—as Emmett approached and Edward struggled to pin Bella, she suddenly froze. I watched as her eyes took on a glassy look. And suddenly, before any of us knew what had happened, Bella was on her feet, and Edward and Emmett were on the ground, unable to move. This was different than her usual "shield". When she holds us back, it's like hitting a brick wall; we can still move, but we cannot get around the "wall" she has up. This time though, Edward and Emmett were incapacitated; they could not move a muscle._

_Edward notes that what Bella had done felt similar to what Chase had done to him a month ago in the wood in Canada. His senses were intact when Chase pinned him to the tree, but he could not move a muscle. _

_Bella feels that she cannot control her abilities. Sometimes, she says, she can use them and other times she cannot. Day three, for example, she could not do anything. Is there some sort of trigger? Why has every other day been a success? Why can she not use these powers on demand?_

_What else can Bella do? And how much of this has to do with her being a hybrid?_

Carlisle glanced up from his notebook to watch as Emmett grabbed a shrieking Bella and threw her over his shoulder.

"Not so tough now, huh?" he teased, getting ready to throw her in a huge pile of colorful autumn leaves. Carlisle smiled and looked back down at his notes. Writing was one of the few "human habits" that Carlisle thoroughly enjoyed. He loved to keep notes on everything, despite his perfect memory. As a doctor to the humans, he had gotten used to writing everything down; it was expected in that world. But now, even at home, lounging on the outisde patio with his vampire family around him and no humans for miles, he still loved to write. There was something about pen on paper, the scratch of the ink…the idea of a record. Humans were never to know his kind existed. But Carlisle liked the idea that perhaps one day the two "races" would be able to live in a world where his kind was accepted. Perhaps one day, vampire history would be written by the humans. Their real history that is…not all that Dracula mumbo-jumbo.

The Cullen's and Bella had left Forks three weeks ago but they hadn't gone far—not yet. Esme had bought a house outside of Portland, Oregon over ten years ago for when his doctor duties called him to a bigger city. For awhile, it seemed as though he was going down to Portland every weekend to work at an inner-city hospital. Esme finally decided a decade ago that they might as well at least have a place to live, closer to the "big city". Carlisle knew she had been itching to restore another house and so there it was; large, beautiful and impeccably decorated. It had been built in the early 1900's by a rich farming family and was located 32 miles outside of Portland on a twenty acre span of land. Really, it was perfect for what they needed. Privacy and space…far enough from a large city, but not too far that the kids couldn't head back to school and be "normal" if they so desired. Rosalie and Emmett had just enrolled at Portland State University and Rosalie had mentioned something about getting an apartment to stay at during the school week. Esme hadn't liked the idea, but Carlisle recognized that Rosalie needed space away from the family—mainly, away from Bella.

Carlisle sighed slightly, causing Esme to glance up from her magazine. Carlisle smiled at his wife fondly and squeezed her hand.

"Love?" she questioned, a small smile on her lips.

"Just thinking about the kids," he responded, glancing again at Emmett and Bella, who had been joined by Edward and Alice. Carlisle chuckled as Bella threw a handful of leaves at Edward, laughing wildly as he ducked and grabbed her around the waist, tackling her back into the pile of leaves where Alice was trying to bury Emmett, as he growled at her playfully.

"She seems happy," responded Esme softly.

"She does, doesn't she. She's come a long way in a short time," replied Carlisle quietly.

"And she and Edward, they glow," smiled Esme.

"They're re-discovering their relationship," agreed Carlisle, looking away as Bella stopped struggling in the leaves and the two shared a long, charged look.

And indeed they were. Everyone in the house was aware that the two were completely infatuated with the other. And yet, it wasn't like last time, it wasn't like when Bella had been human. They were obviously taking things slow. Carlisle could see the hesitation in Bella—the struggle she seemed to be having within herself. Carlisle could only guess at what was going through her mind—but he had a good idea of what part of her fear consisted of.

He knew she still feared Edward's sudden departure last year. She was afraid it would happen again. She was afraid to fall too deep…though Carlisle knew she already had…it was evident to everyone by the way she looked at him, the way they looked at each other. But he also knew there was a much deeper rooted fear that kept her at arm's length.

Carlisle wasn't sure about that one. He wasn't even sure she knew what it was—but he felt it from her and he thought it had to do with her fear of what she was…the unknown.

If he was being honest with himself, Carlisle was afraid too. Everything he knew about hybrids pointed down a dark and tortured path. That is why he had taken to testing Bella as much as he could. If he could get in there and understand it, then they had a better chance of beating it. So far, the tests only presented him with more questions, some of which were un-settling.

And there was still the alternative plan…an idea, perhaps a farfetched idea, which had slowly been growing in Carlisle's head. As he watched the increasing powers in Bella, the idea was starting to solidify. But he wasn't ready to talk to the family about it. Not even Esme. He didn't want to bring it up until he knew what would happen with Bella. Until he was sure it was the only solution. He prayed it wouldn't have to come to that—and that his family would never have to hear the idea.

Until then, he would continue to test, monitor and record.

"I just wish Rose…" Esme frowned, trailing off, glancing back behind them towards the inside of the house.

"I know," Carlisle agreed, following her glance. Rosalie had made herself scarce since Bella's arrival. Carlisle had a pretty good idea why. Rose was used to being the most beautiful vampire around; she was used to garnering the attention of everyone. Since Bella had come to stay with them, Rose had not been the center of everything, as everyone was focused on Bella. Not only that, but Rosalie had deemed Bella a threat, shocked that the human whom she had once considered to be plain, was suddenly a stunningly beautiful vampire. Rosalie did not like competition, not in the beauty department. Her way to deal with the whole thing was to avoid the family.

"Maybe getting out of the house will be good for her. She and Emmett will visit on the weekends. They will be fine," replied Carlisle.

"I just wish she could be more accepting of Bella. I know how badly Bella feels about Rose's avoidance. The other day, she spoke to Alice of perhaps leaving so Rose didn't feel that she had to," Esme's mouth turned down. She already thought of Bella as one of her own daughters and the thought of Bella leaving was equally as bad as Rose leaving.

"Give her time. She'll come around eventually," Carlisle replied vaguely, distracted by the appearance of Jasper outside. He watched as Alice bounded over and jumped into his arms, throwing her arms around his neck in attempts to pull him downwards, to the pile of leaves. He could hear Jasper laughing as he gave in and allowed himself to be pulled down. The family had mainly been staying inside the past few weeks, other than at night. Today was the first day they had really ventured out, as the weather was cooling off and they were beginning to feel more at home in the farmhouse.

"We do have a beautiful family," sighed Esme, her frown forgotten.

"No," shouted a voice, suddenly. "No, no!" Carlisle jumped up from the porch swing and saw Bella jump to her feet, her face full of shock as she stared at Edward. Carlisle didn't understand the tone in her voice. She sounded upset, almost angry. As he strode across the porch to steps, realization hit him. The sun had come out. Though Portland had had a couple sunny days since they'd arrived, they had spent those days inside. The thought had not crossed Carlisle's mind until this very second as he stared at his family. Everyone sparkled brilliantly.

Everyone, that is, except Bella.

"Bella? Bella, what's wrong?" Edward was asking, reaching for her.

"Look! Look at me!" she exclaimed, angrily extending her arm towards Edward. Comprehension dawned on his face, but as Carlisle approached the five young vampires, it was Jasper's face that grabbed his attention.

"Jasper?" he called out, concerned at what he saw. Jasper didn't acknowledge him. His mouth hung open in surprise and confusion.

Carlisle felt himself getting annoyed.

"Jasper!" he said again, exasperated.

"She…she's got my power. Can you feel it?" he murmured quietly. Carlisle opened his mouth, getting ready to lash out. But Jasper's words struck him.

_She's got my power._

Jasper could manipulate emotions. He could make a room full of upset people calm. Conversely, he could rile up the most complacent of people, causing them to commit acts they never would have dreamed of doing.

Understanding dawned on Carlisle and he turned to Bella.

"Bella! Take a deep breath!" he called.

Bella glanced over at him, her anger seemingly forgotten as her face showed confusion. Carlisle felt his previous burst of annoyance and temper wash away.

"What happened?" asked Alice, grabbing Jasper's hand, her eyes wide. "For a second there, I felt…really weird."

"Annoyed?" questioned Emmett, "Me too. I felt like I needed to punch something," he glanced over at Edward. "It was going to be you," he added with a grin and a shrug.

Bella finished taking another breath.

"Did I do that?" she whispered.

"I think so. We all know Jasper's ability seems to be hindered by your presence."

It was the same for Alice's ability. But Edward's seemed to come and go. Sometimes he could hear the thoughts of others, even when Bella was around. But usually, it was just snippets.

"I-I got mad when I realized I didn't sparkle like the rest of you do," she said apologetically.

"You've got Jasper's ability. Try something for me, Bella. Try and do it again. But maybe not with anger this time."

Bella glanced at Edward who smiled encouragingly.

"I don't know how I did it," she responded.

"Make us happy. Think of something that makes you happy," suggested Jasper.

Bella closed her eyes and smiled for a long moment before opening them again.

"Anything?" she asked.

Alice shook her head and glanced at Carlisle.

"It might not work the same for you, Bella," responded Carlisle. Noticing her defeated expression, he smiled and waved a hand.

"Don't worry about it, Bella. We've got so much time to figure this all out. We'll play around with it another day."

Bella nodded, her eyes downcast, her fingers absently rubbing the hem of her t-shirt. Emmett took that as his opportunity and tackled her back into the leaves, his attempt at lightening her mood. Bella smiled, but it didn't meet her eyes.

The sun fell behind the clouds. The day fell into shadow.

The leaves were forgotten.

* * *

Edward tried his best to hide his concern as Bella got ready to sleep that night. Though she didn't sleep nearly as much as any human slept, she still found that she needed a few hours of sleep every few days, especially after she ate human food.

He wasn't concerned about what had happened outside that day. He was concerned about Bella's reaction and her subsequent actions. She had remained extremely quiet, choosing to seclude herself from the family for the rest of the day. When he had eventually grown sick of waiting for her to re-appear, Edward had found her in the large library, her nose buried in a book…a book that she had quickly flipped closed and out of his sight at his presence.

Now, as she changed and put on her pajama's in the bathroom, Edward sat on the bed, working on his facial features—he did not want her to think he was worried about her. He knew she would jump to the wrong conclusions. He glanced towards the bathroom and noticed the door was slightly ajar. His eyes quickly found her reflection in the mirror, as she pulled on the over-sized t-shirt she slept in—one of his very own. He smiled at her appearance his heart constricting tightly, his concern forgotten for the moment.

He ran a hand threw his copper hair and lay back on the bed. This time always stirred up mixed emotions deep within. He missed Bella while she slept, even felt annoyed that she still had to sleep, even as a vampire. And yet—he loved to watch her. He loved the way she lost any inhibitions. Her face always softened…the stress and frustrations, the loses and injustice of her days would wash away and she seemed peaceful, happy.

She seemed like Bella again. And of course, there was the talking.

Edward loved the talking. He smiled to himself at the thought of what she would say tonight.

"What are you grinning at?" asked Bella, entering back into the bedroom from the bathroom, her tone light. She apparently didn't want to talk about the day's events. Edward propped himself up on an elbow and took a moment to admire her beauty. He could never get enough of her, not ever. He drank in her long, bare legs and smiled back at her wickedly, reminding himself to keep things light.

"You," he responded, raising an eyebrow at her. Bella stopped to pull her long hair into a ponytail. The shirt danced its way upward and Edward couldn't help but feel his grin stretch across his face. He loved her body, every inch of it. Even the ones he had not yet seen, but had no problem waiting to see. Her very presence drove him crazy, but he knew how important it was to take it slow this time. They did have eternity, after all.

"You, in my shirt," he corrected.

Bella grinned and pulled the shirt down slightly, running the rest of the way at the bed and leaping. She landed on top of Edward, rolling him from his side to his back, exactly where she had planned.

"Mmmm," murmured Edward, his hands reaching up to cut Bella's face in his hands. Bella leaner her face into his hands and sighed.

"Are you going to stay with me tonight?" she asked, her eyes closed. She put her weight on Edward, stretching herself out on his body. Edward rolled her over so that they were on their sides, facing each other.

"I always do," he responded his hands on her tiny hips.

"Even those times when I.."

"When you begged me not to stay? Yes," he replied with a grin, brushing back a lock of stray hair. Bella buried her face in her hand.

"Ugh. I know I embarrass myself. I talk too much," she said, her voice slightly muffled.

"I don't miss you as much when I stay," replied Edward, taking her hands from her face gently. "It's like we're having a one-sided conversation," he chuckled.

Bella's face turned serious as she met his eyes.

"I sleep to dream about you," she whispered softly.

"You…?"

"When you were gone and when I was turned, I didn't mind sleeping so much. Infact, the only reason I let myself even fall asleep was so I could dream about you. I missed you so much. And when I was sleeping, we were together. Well, either that or you were chasing me and turning into Victoria. But mostly, we were together. And happy."

"Like now?" asked Edward, hesitatingly.

"Like now," she replied softly. "But now, I don't want to close my eyes."

"But you know I will be right here when you wake up. I will be the first thing you see, as long as that's what you want," replied Edward, feeling Bella's breath on his face. He put his arms around her and pulled her closer.

"It's what I've always wanted," she replied, her voice slurring slightly, as her eyes momentarily drooped closed and then back open.

"Then close your eyes, my Bella," he whispered, and as she did, he leaned in and kissed her gently on her soft full lips, lingering to brush them again and again before pulling back. Her lips turned up, but her eyes didn't open. A few seconds later, her breathing evened out and she was deep asleep.

"Dream for both of us, my love."

* * *

**A/N: I know, I'm consistantly apologizing for my lack of editing/proof reading. I just don't have time to go re-read more than once! Maybe I should think about getting a beta. Would anyone be interested? Let me know in a note or PM me...**

**You guys rock my week, you know! I love getting your comments throughout those looooong ass school days--they make me happy! SO...that said, please keep 'em coming! Tell me what you think!**


	20. Chapter 19 Walking in Between

**CHAPTER NINETEEN Walking in Between**

_It was the laugh that scared her the most: malicious, cold and full of bitterness. _

_She looked around her to see where it had come from, but the dark stone room was empty. A flickering caught her eye and she turned. Near the back of the cold room, a single candle was lit, illuminating the darkness around it. She still didn't know where she was—but it didn't feel welcoming and she didn't want to be there. She shivered deeply._

_She glanced around again to find the source of that laugh--but there was no one._

_She opened her mouth to call out, turning herself around in the empty room._

_There is was again. That laugh. Full of dangerous knowledge and dark power, she could hear it all._

_...and it was coming straight from her throat, bubbling up and spilling out. She couldn't stop! The diabolical laugh would not cease._

_Mouth open in horror, silent scream on lips, she turned and ran towards the looming dark wooden doors. As she approached, the doors swung open. She skidded to a stop, dread creeping through her stomach._

"_I heard you beckon, my love," a dark figure hovered in the doorway, but she could not see his face. When she did not answer, he paused._

"_Is it time?" he asked, looking at her closely, his face shadowed. _

"_It's time. And _god_, I am starving. Let the humans in," she answered, her voice sounding hard and cold. A hand flew up to her mouth and her eyes widened. _

_How had those words come from her mouth?_

I'm someone else. This isn't me_, she told herself, feeling the corners of her mouth involuntarily pull up into a cruel smile._

"_You look so beautiful when you have blood in your eyes, Bella. Bonne appetite, love."_

_Bella._

_Bella._

_Bella._

_She wasn't sure who was screaming louder; her or the humans about to be slaughtered._

--

As the days ticked on, the dreams got stranger.

Bella rubbed tiredly at her eyes, fighting the fatigue that had washed over her. She was scared of closing her eyes; there was never anything good waiting for her on the other side—not anymore.

It had been four days since she last closed her eyes, four days since she'd seen the horrors that surely kept waiting patiently during her waking hours. Images of blood-lust and screaming, a candle-lit room and a hooded man.

Alice was worried about Bella. The dark circles around her eyes only grew darker. She was also trying discreetly to not eat human food…but Alice and the rest of the Cullen's saw that her strength was waning because of her change in diet. Carlisle's tests had been generally unsuccessful during the past couple days, as her powers seemed to disappear with her strength and energy.

Alice regarded Bella, who currently had her nose buried in a book, and sighed quietly. Edward, sitting close to Bella on the couch, glanced up from the game of chess he and Jasper were currently engaged in, his eyes questioning. Jasper's eyes found hers as well—his attention shifting immediately from the game in front of him to his girlfriend, concern written across his face. The only one who appeared not to hear her was Bella. Alice shook her head and turned away from their inquisitive eyes. She couldn't think straight with Bella around. She needed to know what to do. She needed to see.

Brushing past a suddenly startled Rosalie, Alice made her way to the door.

"Going hunting," she called, not looking back at Jasper, who would surely know she was lying. She took off quickly, knowing she would have to gain a few miles before she would be free of the mental block that was Bella Swan.

Alice only slowed to a brisk walk when she felt a familiar freedom in her head; a freedom she missed but also a freedom she could do without if it meant Bella was safe and with her family. She stopped walking and leaned carefully against a tree, closing her eyes as she felt herself relax slightly.

It didn't take long for the visions to grab her.

_Bella in the woods, her hair disheveled, tears running down her face. Blood on her hands, she screamed._

Follwed quickly by another:

_Edward, this time. Talking, pleading with a stranger. Black hair and cold, dead eyes. A smile of malice curled on his lips as he shook his head._

And again:

_Carlisle, his eyes black, bent over a lifeless body. Bella's lifeless body. Blood everywhere._

Alice tore open her eyes, her small palms flying to her face as she tried to steady her pounding head. She couldn't seen to focus in on any of the images…they were changing by the minute. Alice closed her eyes again, focusing harder this time. She needed answers.

But what she saw next, she did not expect.

_Bella, with an almost unrecognizably cold, hard face, sitting next to someone Alice could almost name. The room was huge and lit by candles. _Where is this?_ Bella spoke to the man next to her and he laughed dangerously, his voice echoing against the stone walls. He pulled her hand up to his lips and kissed it admiringly._

Alice pulled back from the vision in shock. She knew that face. He was one of the Volturi. She had seen his picture in one of Carlisle's books, years ago.

"Oh no, oh no," muttered Alice straightening up. She knew her visions were limited, she could only see the outcomes of decisions once they've been made—which meant that the future can change very suddenly if that mind changes again. But for the moment, Alice was terrified.

How could Bella possibly wind up with the Volturi? Whose choices was she seeing and how was she supposed to make it stop? Alice walked slowly back in the direction of the farmhouse, feeling worse than she had only an hour before.

She could not let that future happen. She needed help.

--

"Bella!" yelled Emmett, his voice loud against the stillness of the house. Bella winced from the couch as Edward smiled beside her.

"Emmett?" she answered back, rubbing her eyes once more, forcing them open wide.

_You're not tired. You're not tired. You're not tired, _she chanted silently.

"It's time to go for a hunt!" he replied, avoiding Edward's incredulous look and grabbing Bella's right arm to pull her to her feet.

"Emmett, I don't know, I've been feeling kinda…" she trailed off, barely noticing Alice slip into the room behind Emmett.

"Tired?" she replied, her pixie-like face questioning. "Maybe 'cause you haven't been eating?" she said, her eyes trained darkly on Bella's face, as though searching for an answer to something un-seen.

"Alice?" questioned Jasper from the chess board. He and Edward had been a locked in an extremely long game. With Bella beside them, they were actually playing like normal human beings for once.

"Bella, you need to eat," said Alice, ignoring the looks from the three boys.

"When I eat, I have horrible dreams, Alice. They—they're so real. I don't want to sleep," Bella shuttered slightly, remembering the last dream.

"Then come hunt with me. You don't sleep after you drink blood, do you? "asked Emmett, obviously unaware of the tension in the room.

Edward stood up, taking a step towards Alice.

"Alice..." he started quietly, looking into her eyes. She just shook her head and glared at him.

"It won't work, Edward. She's got us blocked. Even you now, am I right?"

Edward stared at Alice for another moment and then nodded slowly. He turned to Bella.

"Bella, you haven't eaten in days. Why don't you help Emmett take down a bear?" he said lightly, but his eyes remained dark, tight.

Bella stared first at Alice and then at Edward.

_Please Bella, just go. I know you know something, Alice. And you're going to tell me whether you like it or not_. Bella stepped back at the sound of Edward's voice, her eyes wide.

"What?" she asked surprised.

"A bear," replied Edward with a forced laugh. "I haven't seen Emmett take down a bear in a long time. I bet he could use your help."

Bella couldn't answer him. Instead, she followed Emmett mutely from the room, barely noticing that Edward squeezed her hand as she walked by.

She didn't need to wonder for very long about her sanity. A moment later, as she passed by Rosalie in the hallway, it was confirmed:

_Look at how smug she looks. If she only knew I asked Emmett to take her out of this house. Get her out of here while I talk to Carlisle and Esme. They are not going to like this…_

And yet, Rosalie's lips did not move as she glared at Bella.

She had heard Edward's thoughts. She had heard Rosalie. She also had Edward's power? Bella groaned out loud and rubbed her temples.

"We won't go far, promise. I know you're tired," said Emmett from in front of her.

Bella nodded soundlessly, her head much too occupied by this new information than to really care where she went. She followed along compliantly, suddenly feeling happy to be out of the farmhouse. As she breathed in the crisp fall air, she started to feel better, lighter.

"Hey, Emmett, you take care of the bear, I think I'm going to find something a little less…gigantic!" yelled Bella, her legs pumping quickly as she veered away from Emmett who had caught the smell of something that interested him.

"Good deal, little sis," and he was off, a low growl escaping his mouth. Bella sniffed the air tentatively, looking for something more along the lines of a deer. She could handle a deer. And maybe the blood would rejuvenate her—human food was off limits for now, but why should blood be the same? Bella pushed the last blood drinking experience from her head and focused instead on the scent ahead of her, allowing it to fill every part of her.

It didn't take long to take down the unsuspecting doe and Bella found herself doing it with a sudden, surprising delight. Without any hesitation this time, she sunk her teeth into the deer's jugular and drank deeply, not pausing in the slightest between gulps.

She hadn't realized she was so hungry.

As she pulled away from the half drained doe, she felt immediately better, despite the awful taste lingering in her mouth. Blood made her feel so much more…satisfied than human food ever did. And maybe she wouldn't have to sleep a few more days.

Bella sat next to the carcass for a few more minutes, waiting to see if the dizziness from last time would over-take her. It seemed like she was safe. Carefully, she stood up and took a couple steps.

She felt great. Powerful. She was ready to fight a grizzly.

She was ready to take on the world.

--

When Bella and Emmett got back to the house, Bella could feel the tension the moment the two crossed the threshold of the front door.

Warily, she sought out Edward and finally found him alone in the library, his head in his hands.

"Who died?" she joked hesitating at the double French doors.

Edward's head slowly came up, his eyes serious.

"Bella," he spoke softly, his expression tender.

"Hi," she replied nervously. His stillness frightened her. Usually he was always only too eager to jump from wherever he was and whatever he was doing to greet her, to touch her forehead, her face. To smile into her eyes and brush her lips with his. But there he remained, still.

"How was the hunt with Emmett? You look better. You look so much better," he said, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Did I really look that horrible?" she asked with a tiny laugh, edging herself into the room and leaning against the wall near the door.

"You always look beautiful, Bella. You were…you still are…looking tired. But your eyes are sparkling again," he smiled, but it did not reach his eyes.

"Edward, what's wrong?" she asked, feeling suddenly frantic.

"Tell me about your dreams, Bella," he answered, looking her in the eye. Bella furrowed her brow, confused.

"They're horrible. I wake up screaming. What more do you need to know?" she asked, not wanting to think about the haunting dreams that had taken over her sleeping hours.

"What happens?" he asked, his eyes intent.

"What's this about, Edward? What was it you wanted to talk to Alice about?" she asked, avoiding the question.

Edward's eyes widened.

"I didn't-" he started.

"I heard you," she interrupted, folding her arms across her chest.

"But…heard me?" he was confused and Bella didn't know why. How could they not see this coming? How had this not been completely obvious?

"I heard your thoughts, Edward. Just quickly, when Alice was there. You wanted me to go hunting with Emmett so you could talk to Alice about something. Something you obviously didn't want me around for."

"Bella. Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, standing up in one fluid motion, so suddenly that Bella took a step towards the door.

"You were a little distracted," she mumbled. "But you didn't answer my question."

"Nor you, mine," he answered, running a hand through his bronze hair, obviously fazed by her recent revelation.

"Fine, we'll trade answers then. And you're not allowed to leave this room until you give me details, Edward. I'm sick of being the last to know what's going on. That's how it was when I was a human, that's how it seems to be now. Everyone is talking _around _me and _about _me, but not _to _me," she was angry now; she could feel her new energy bubbling up, "and it's getting old," she finished.

"We're just trying to pro-"

"And don't tell me you're trying to protect me. I'm not delicate Bella anymore. Infact, I'm willing to bet I could take you, Edward. So don't test me," Bella managed to attach a small teasing tone to her last comment, but Edward just nodded, not a trace of a smile anywhere.

"You're right. I know you're right—about both things. Old habits die hard though, Bella," replied Edward, backing up and sitting back into an old brown leather couch. Bella silently took a couple steps and then sat down on the thick Persian carpet infront of Edward, her eyes on the man she so desperately loved, as he reached under a leather cushion.

He pulled out a book. Bella recognized it immediately, suddenly feeling guiltily.

_The Volturi: A History._

She had been reading the thick history novel for some time now, searching for answers on her own. Instead, all she was coming up with were more questions.

"Alice didn't go hunting today," said Edward, his eyes dark again. "She wanted to get out of the house, away from you, so she could see."

Bella nodded, understanding.

"She saw something that scared," Edward's eyes flickered from Bella to the book he was holding and back to Bella.

"Me," stated Bella.

"You with the Volturi. You with Nathaniel," he responded softly.

Bella nodded, not feeling as surprised as she should have.

"Your dreams…?" Edward winced, waiting for confirmation. He wouldn't be surprised either, it seemed.

"I didn't know for sure until right now. I assumed, but I didn't know. Me. Well, she looks like me, in my dreams, but she's evil, crazy. She's always in this dark stone room with a hooded man. One of the Volturi…Nathaniel? And she wants to kill the humans. She's hungry. But it can't be me, Edward. And it's just a dream," she concluded, nodding her head, as though appeasing herself.

"I think…we think, Bella, that you've got a bit of all of our powers. Whoever you're around, you seem to be able to pull from. With Chase, remember? And then with Jasper the other day? And now me. It makes sense, we don't exactly know how it all works. What triggers…" he trailed off thoughtfully for a moment and then took a breath, "but I think you also pull from Alice. Only, you see through your dreams."

"No. I think you're wrong. At least about the Alice part. I have yet to have a dream that has predicted the future," Bella wanted so badly for Edward to be wrong. Especially about the dreams. He had to be wrong.

Edward took a breath.

"You don't remember all your dreams, Bella. But I heard them. I hear you. You told me before it even happened, Bella—you told me in your sleep, that you wouldn't sparkle the night before we found out for sure. You dreamed about it and you were right. Last week, you told me Rose and Emmett were moving out permanently. You said they were going to live in Portland, get an apartment. No one knew that yet, Bella. Not even Esme and Carlisle."

Bella froze her mind racing.

"No," she whispered. "No, it can't be."

"We think it's true, Bella."

"But that means…and with Alice's vision…"

Edward nodded his face grim.

"The Volturi wants you and they have plans to get you. And right now, it looks like they're going to succeed."

"But how? I am not that person in my dreams! I wouldn't _do_ that" shouted Bella, tears coming to her eyes.

_You're not that person yet, Bella. Give it time._

Bella paused, tilting her head, listening.

"Who was that?" she whispered. Edward knelt down next to her, his hand on her cheek.

"I didn't hear anything," he responded.

Bella held every muscle still, straining her mind, searching for the voice.

"Bella?" came Edward's voice. But it was far away now and Bella was only listening for one thing.

_We will meet soon, Bella. Sweet dreams._

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**A/N: Sigh. I'm not one-hundred percent happy with this chapter, but it seves its purpose--to move things along a bit. So buckle the fuck up, cause craziness is around the corner!**

**Your reviews continue to make me smile (esp. those of you who take the time to leave such long, thoughtful notes!), thank you, thank you all :)**

**Ps--if you guys have time/haven't read it yet, check out Innocent, Vigilant, Ordinary by Oxymornonic8 (it should be the only story in on my favourite list right now)...it's not yet complete, but it is...amazing. Make sure you have time to kill though and no major exams or papers on the horizon...it's impossible to stop reading such an awesome story by an incredibly talented writer!**

**But wait, don't go yet! Review my chapter first! Happy weekend!**


	21. Chapter 20 New Dynamics

**Sometimes, the writing comes more easily when I jump into a character's head. Welcome to chapter twenty and Edward's point of view.**

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**Chapter 20 New Dynamics**

I was terrified for her life and I didn't know what else to do.

So I took her—and I ran. At the moment, I thought the plan was brilliant. No, scratch that--it wasn't even close and I knew it--but I _was_ convinced my plan was her only hope…it was a desperate last ditch attempt at salvation.

Carlisle was doing nothing and I was at the end of my wits watching. I couldn't bear witness to his failure as he himself was lost in indecision. Had I been able to hear exactly what he was contemplating, perhaps I never would have left.

Bella had fallen asleep almost exactly 48 hours after hearing the mysterious voice. She had fought like hell; she was terrified of dreaming, especially after what she had heard.

I, on the other hand, saw this as my opportunity. Because what I had in mind, she would never agree to. Neither would the rest of my family, for that matter.

It ended up being much easier than I'd thought. Bella fell asleep at 4:33pm when everyone but she and I were in Portland. Rose and Emmett were living in the city now, Alice and Jasper were scouting new cars and Carlisle was at the hospital working part-time to keep up the human façade. Esme, it seemed, was checking out paint for the guest room at a specialty decorating shop.

There was no time like the present.

I had been worried about moving Bella, worried she might wake-up. But the worry was in vain, she was out cold.

It didn't matter where we went, I figured, as long as it was away from my family—away from the obvious location. Until now, the Volturi would have had no problem locating Bella…all signs pointed straight at the Cullen residence—or any of the many Cullen residences—it would not have been hard to find us. We were like sitting ducks, with only Bella un-reliable powers to protect her.

But now, perhaps it would be more of a challenge. Alice and Jasper would have their powers back without us there—Alice would be able to see a lot more clearly what was coming. And now, I had to bank on Bella's abilities…otherwise, there was no hope.

As I guided my sleek Volvo east towards Montana, I glanced over at my Bella and sighed quietly. She was still sound asleep, her head resting against the pillow I'd placed between her body and the passenger's side window. She had yet to speak out loud and I hoped desperately that that meant only good things for her dreams. I reached over and placed my hand on her jean-clad leg, wishing I could ignore the sudden buzzing of my cell phone.

I sighed.

I knew it wouldn't be long before Alice was free from Bella's "block", but I had hoped we would have gained much more ground. It had not yet been three hours.

"Alice," I answered sharply.

"Why are you taking her? What's this going to achieve, Edward?" she demanded her small voice furious.

"I don't know, Alice. But what I do know is that sitting in the house, waiting for them to come get her is not working for me anymore. For Bella. I'm taking her somewhere."

"Yeah, I gathered that. You don't know where yet," she stated. Her visions must be shifting—I had yet to make up my mind.

"I don't. And you need to stop looking. The less you know the better."

"You're being ridiculous, Edward. Bella warned me she thought you were going to do something rash. How is this going to help? We need numbers, Edward," her voice rose to a higher pitch and I closed my eyes briefly.

"I'm going to keep her safe until we figure this out. We need a plan, but she needs to be away from the Cullen's. It's where they will look first."

Alice remained silent a moment.

"What does Bella think about your plan?" she asked.

I smiled sheepishly into the phone.

"She doesn't know yet. She's sleeping."

"You _kidnapped_ her? Edward! Bella is going to be so pissed off at you!" her tone changed and she suddenly sounded delighted.

"Don't be looking, Alice. Promise me. I'll call you guys," I said firmly.

"But—"

"No."

"Fine. But I guarantee Carlisle will want to—"

"And he can. We need to talk about a plan. We can't hide her forever," I replied.

"Fine. Be careful, Edward. And tell Bella I love her. Let her hit you a few times for me."

I laughed dryly and hung up, wondering how exactly Bella would react and how much longer I had until I found out. I applied my foot harder to the gas pedal, urging the much too slow Volvo faster. I hated that we had to drive, but I had a feeling a car would come in handy eventually.

We made it to a small town in Montana before I decided it was enough for one day. All I needed now was a generic hotel room. As much as it made sense though, I couldn't bear to check Bella into a crappy motel. I finally found something a little classier—at least a step up from the rundown shacks that literally lined the streets.

Bella was still completely unconscious when I pulled back the blankets of the king size bed and laid her down gently, smoothing back a lock of her hair and wondering what images she was seeing behind her lids at this very moment.

I lay back beside her, my hands tucked under my head and stared silently at the ceiling. Beside me, Bella groaned quietly and turned to her side. I followed suit, staring at her flawless face, aching to protect her yet not knowing how.

"Edward," she murmured her voice soft. I waited.

"We shouldn't be here, Edward," her brow furrowed slightly, a frown turning down the corners of her full lips. I sucked in a breath and waited.

"It doesn't matter where we go," she went on, the crease in her brow deepening. "He'll find us," she added. She was quiet for a moment, the frown disappeared and Edward wondered if she was waking up.

"Carlisle!" she yelled suddenly. And her eyes popped open, her mouth set in a silent 'O'. Her hand shot up to touch her neck.

"Bella! Are you okay? Bella, I'm here," Bella's eyes had darted around the room, frightened, before my voice guided them to my face. She relaxed visibly, but confusion shadowed her features.

"Where are we?" she asked, not taking her eyes from my own. But I was concerned about something else.

"Bella, I'll tell you in a minute…but can you remember…you yelled Carlisle's name right before you woke up. Do you remember why?" I asked one hand on Bella's face, the other searching frantically in my pocket for my cell phone.

Bella paused, running a hand through her thick chestnut hair.

"I was dreaming that we were going for a trip, you and I. And…wait," her eyes searched the room once more, suspiciously. "we really did, didn't we? We're not in Oregon anymore?"

"No, we're in Montana, right now," I replied, hoping the answer would allow her mind to focus back on her dreams.

"But why?"

"Bella, Carlisle. What happened?"

"I don't…I can't remember," she answered slowly, her eyes narrowing thoughtfully.

"In that case, hold on a moment," I dialed Carlisle's cell phone quickly. Carlsile picked it up on the first ring.

"Edward. Is everything okay? Is Bella…?"

"She's fine, we're okay. She just woke up yelling your name. I had to make sure everything was.."

"Everything's normal here, so far. Alice is mad at you, but I'm sure she told you herself. Edward, do you think taking her away from here is best?" he asked it in a way that made me feel so guilty. And wrong.

"I don't know. I just…I had to do something," I responded, feeling stupid. Feeling helpless.

Feeling seventeen.

"It's hard, I know, Edward. Waiting, wondering. But I have…well, I've got a couple ideas. When we found out you took off with Bella, I realized we need to act. Which means, I need us all to make a decision, mainly Bella. We could decide over the phone about our course of action, though I'd prefer to speak to you two face-to-face; it's a very serious decision. You decide what you want to do and then let us know."

"Okay," I replied quickly, my voice strained, getting ready to hang up.

"And Edward? Don't forget about Demetri. I don't know how his power will work in conjunction with Bella's. But be careful. He is a skilled tracker."

"I thought about that. He's never seen inside Bella's head—or mine. I think Bella's' abilities will block any attempts made," I answered, my voice so much more sure than my dead heart.

I better be right. I better fucking be right.

We hung up and I found myself wondering what Carlisle had come up with. First though, I had to speak to a very pissed off looking Bella.

I hit 'end' and turned to face her; her arms crossed and face stony.

"So this was your great idea, Edward? To kidnap me and run?"

"I didn't think…I couldn't just watch you fall apart, Bella. I feel like that's what was happening," I said, my voice pleading with her.

"It is! This is what is supposed to happen to me, Edward!"

"That's ridiculous, Bella. It will only happen if we let it, and we aren't going to let it!"

"How are we going to stop this? It's getting worse every day! And now I'm hearing his voice too, Edward. He's stalking my dreams and now he's invaded my waking hours. I can almost see how they will do this—how they will succeed!" her voice climbed higher as she grew more frantic, "He's going to drive me crazy himself…he's going to turn me into—"

"No, Bella," I interrupted fiercely, grabbing Bella's arms securely in my hands. "No," I was on my knees now, in front of her on the bed, our faces inches apart.

I had no make her understand.

"Has a hybrid ever before had a family that loves her and would do anything to save her from herself? Probably not. Your situation is a new one. It's one that the Volturi has probably never come across. They may be confident right now, but if it comes down to facing the Cullen's, we've got them beat, Bella."I winced slightly at my words, knowing there would be more to it than that. The Volturi possessed some of the most frightening powers in their world. I shuttered slightly, but kept my face firm in front of Bella. She sighed heavily and her body slumped back on the bed, the fight leaving her. I relaxed my grip on her wrists and sat back on my heels.

"What do you think Carlisle has in mind?" she asked dully turning away from me onto her side, probably recalling the words she had heard from my cell phone. I had been wondering that myself. I lay behind her on the bed, my chin on the pillow.

"I'm not sure. I think—I think he's had an idea in his mind for some time. Something he's been struggling with," I thought of the few glimpses of Carlisle's mind I'd had in the past couple weeks. Always indecisive, questioning—caught in an endless internal debate. But about what, I didn't know.

"Do we go back?" she asked quietly, flipping over to look into my eyes. I propped myself up on my elbow and gazed back at her.

"Not yet," I replied, my eyes intent on her face. She nodded, brushing back a tear quickly.

"Bella," I started, reaching for a second tear. With my thumb, ever so gently, I wiped the droplet from her cheek. She shook her head, frustrated and pushed my hand away. She rolled to her back and stared up at the ceiling.

I didn't know how to help her. I wanted so badly to make her feel safe, to feel better. I wanted her to believe my words, like she used to when she was human. But maybe those weren't the words she needed to hear anymore. When Bella was human, I had treated her like a small child, trying to protect her from everything and nothing all at the same time. It had frustrated her when she was alive and now—again-my words were not sufficient. She knew that I would say things just to make her feel better…that I wouldn't divulge all the details because I didn't want her to be frightened.

The kid gloves had to come off and I would have to force myself to get used to the new dynamics. Bella deserved the truth.

"Bella…there's something you need to-"

"Do you realize," she interrupted, turning her face back to mine, a small smile playing on those full red lips, "that we're alone? For the first time in…how long…? We're alone."

I opened my mouth to respond, but in one quick movement, Bella was suddenly on top of me, her knees on either side of my hips, her face, inches from my own.

"Bella," I choked out, my previous intentions completely forgotten as her hands wove their way through my hair. I reached my hand up and cupped her face, closing my eyes as her breath hit my face, calming me immediately.

Her soft lips found their way to my neck and a groan escaped from between my own lips as she kissed and sucked towards my collar bone, pausing for a moment to undo a shirt button, and then continuing her trail of kisses down the top of my chest.

"Bella?" it was supposed to be a question, but it came out as a moan, my hands reaching for her face, her hair…anything to hold onto the waves of desire that were over-taking me.

"Edward," she whispered, her lips suddenly disappearing from my chest. My eyes flew open to find out why…where…but there she was, kissing me passionately, her tongue entwining with my own. My hands found her back, her long hair. Soon, they were lost within the strands that mesmerized me so. Her own hands found my shirt, un-did more buttons impatiently, finally giving up on patience and pulling hard. The last two buttons popped off happily and skittered across the hard-wood floor. As the kiss continued to deepen, Bella's free hand trailed down my chest to the button on my jeans.

I undid a hand from Bella's hair and slowly, hesitantly, trailed my fingers to her breasts, grazing the tops with the tips of my fingers through the thin fabric of her shirt.

I had never touched a woman like that before, clothed or un-clothed. And never, ever Bella.

Unchartered territory? Hell yes.

Her hand had paused at the top of my jeans, as she breathed a low moan into my mouth. She leaned down into my hand, encouraging contact. I cupper her right breast carefully with one hand and allowed the other to travel to the lower hem of her shirt and inside, up, up—further until I reached her bra.

Now what? I smiled into our kiss and Bella pulled back, her eyes wild.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her tone filled with worry.

"I'm…I'm not sure what I'm doing," I admitted, and if I could blush, I would be a bright red. This was about the one area of my hundred-plus years that lacked experience and skill. For the second time in the span of an hour, I felt all seventeen of my human years. It was a strange feeling.

She smiled and I melted. She was everything to me. I wanted this so badly. I wanted to feel as close to her as possible—she was part of who I was now, and I wanted to show her.

"I'm not either. But I want you, Edward. I want to forget everything and just be with you. No worrying about the Victoria, the Volturi or Nathaniel. No worrying about being a hybrid. Or running away. Just us. Me and you, right now…in this moment."

Her words ignited me and suddenly, I knew exactly what to do.

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A/N: Ha! Yes, I'm finally letting B and E have some action. And yes, the next chapter will continue this scene, though, just as a forewarning, I'm not going to have it be too lemon-y graphic. We all know you can find that in so many other stories…so go read those for some sexual relief!

We're going to get into Bella's head next chapter. There is a lot going on. And beware—Nathaniel's voice is getting stronger!

Awesomeyou guys!

Reviewshappy me! So make me happy!


	22. Chapter 21 Rules of Time

**Chapter Twenty-One     Rules of Time**

(Bella's Voice)

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His hands, suddenly ignited, set fire to my body; touching and caressing like I'd never experienced. I moaned my encouragement, my pleasure, low in my throat and arched my back.

His mouth was suddenly everywhere and I felt my normally cool body temperature rise quickly. My shirt and jeans were gone. My bra had been thrown across the room so fast I heard the wall groan upon impact. And my underwear? I had no idea where they went. But I did know that I was now completely naked in front of the one man I loved with everything I possessed…dead heart and all.

And I was suddenly nervous.

I tensed up and Edward lifted his head from my abdomen where he had been doing something wonderful with his tongue and lips.

"Bella?" he asked quickly, his eyes dark, worried—yet still full of love and everything I had ever wanted to see.

I relaxed slightly ad smiled. What was there to be nervous about? He was my everything. I was ready to give him _my_ everything.

Stay in the moment, Bella.

"You're beautiful," I replied, taking him in, running my hands along his strong jaw. His worried face turned quickly into one of pure happiness as he gazed into my eyes. I reached a hand up to his tousled bronze hair and grinned, pulling slightly. He got the point and with a small growl propelled himself forward and met my lips with his own, hungrily. I fought back, my own lips filled with a fire only his skin could control.

As our tongues mutually explored the others mouth, I felt Edward's hand slowly lower again to my breasts, cupping the right and then the left before taking back his tongue and lowering his mouth to my right nipple.

My breath caught in my throat for a moment before I exhaled quickly, the wetness between my legs heating. I ran my hands over the well-defined muscles of his stomach--and groaned. His body, the sucking and licking--the love. It was driving me mad.

"Edward," I managed to get out. "I need you."

Edward's head came up again and he found my eyes with his own. He shifted himself so that he was directly over top of me, holding his body weight off my small frame with his arms. We were both breathing heavily, our eyes intense.

"I love you, Bella Swan. I've loved you from the moment I set eyes on you. Everything in me that is good and right is because of you, Bella. You hold me together; you make this existence bright."

"Edward," I whispered back, as he lowered himself slowly towards me. I could feel his hardness pressing gently against my opening, asking to enter, asking to know every part of me.

"You are my heart and soul," I replied simply but passionately, holding his eyes with my own as he pressed forward.

And then a quick pain as he entered me. I gasped and he cupped my face.

"My Bella, my Bella," he murmured softly as he gently rocked his hips. Tears slid down my face, but I didn't take my eyes off his.

"Bella, am I hurting you?" he asked, his eyes gentle, yet filled with something new--something wonderful, as he wiped away a tear. I responded by pulling him closer, wrapping my arms around his body and pulling him deeper. We both gasped this time and I started to rock my hips back.

The feelings being elicited were indescribable as pleasure began to take control of me. I wrapped my legs around his hips and pushed my own hips up towards him, wanting to feel him in me as deeply as I could.

"Bella!" he gasped, thrusting hard, his body beginning to quiver. He lowered his head again to my breasts and took my left nipple into his mouth as the rocking became more frenzied. I was on the verge of screaming, it all felt so good. And when his hand found the small bundle of nerves down below I did scream.

"Edward! Oh God, Edward!" I felt it all in that second…I was so vividly aware of every feeling, every sensation and emotion within me—and I wanted to release them all. Edward pulled his mouth from my breast and took my head between his hands, his firey eyes telling me he was as close as me. His mouth opened in a silent "O" as his eyes took in my face, which probably didn't look much different than his own.

Three more thrusts and I came un-done. We came together and I refused to allow my eyes to shut. I did not want to miss the emotion on Edward's face as he filled me with the parts of him I never thought I'd have.

A moment later, we lay there panting, Edward's arms wrapped tightly around me, his head buried between my neck and shoulder.

"Bella, Bella," he whispered softly into my hair.

"Edward—that was...," I stopped to catch my breath but didn't have the words.

"Amazing," he finished, rolling beside me and taking my hand in his, placing a kiss on my palm. "So much…more amazing than I'd ever dreamed, Bella," he whispered, tracing the outline of my lips with his left fingertip.

"And it will only get more amazing," I answered, playfully nipping at his finger.

"We do have eternity to practice," he agreed with a grin, tracing his finger down my neck, down my collar to the small valley between my breasts.

"You are perfect, Bella" he whispered, watching his finger trace back up to the peak of my breast. "I have to keep telling myself that you're real. That you're here. That we're together. That you love me. If I was capable of dreaming, I would not believe myself. I would know for sure this was only a dream, teasing me to the brink of insanity," his voice broke slightly.

"I'm really here, Edward," I replied, running my hand along his marble arm. "And I'm not going away," I attempted to smile away a threatening yawn.

Edward saw and chuckled lightly.

"Sleep, my love. Sleep. I'll be right here when you wake," his voice was practically just an echo as I closed my eyes.

"And when I wake up…can we do that again?" I managed to get out. I heard Edward's soft laugh echoing around my head, assuring me that we could. Still grasping his hand tightly I fell into a dreamless sleep.

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_Isabella._

I sat up quickly, my mind filled with the hazy fog of a lost nightmare. Had someone called me? I looked quickly next to me, searching for Edward, but he was gone. Completely alert now, I could feel he wasn't in the hotel room. The voice…it must have been part of my dream.

But where had he gone?

A small piece of paper on the nightstand next to me caught my eye and answered my question.

_My Bella_ (it read),

_I love you. I love you. I love you._

_I hope you don't see this before I get back—but in case you wake up; I went to get you something delicious to eat. You will need your energy…_

_Be back very soon. And by the way, I love you._

_Edward._

I lay back against a stack of pillows and smiled, recalling how amazing we had been only a few hours ago. It had been so much better than I had ever imaged as a human. So filled with love and emotion. Passion and discovery. It had been so much more than I had ever expected.

I wanted to do a lot more of that with Edward.

For eternity.

_Bella._

A voice. I knew immediately it had not been spoken out loud. I also knew I had not been mistaken—it was the voice that had woken me up.

_Isabella, it's almost time._

"No," I replied with mounting dread, my eyes wide, the smile falling from my face. I glanced around the room frantically, knowing the threat was not something I could fight off. Nor was it something I could see. "No", I said again, flinging back the blankets and madly searching for my clothes.

_You're mine, Isabella. Don't make this harder than it has to be. Come to me, my lovely._

"Why are you doing this?" I yelled pulling out the suitcase Edward had packed for me. Quickly, I slid into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, my eyes searching the room as I did so.

_Because you belong to me, Isabella. _

"I don't belong to you! I don't even know who you are! What did I do?" I yelled frantically, dashing to the window. I pulled the curtains together tightly, my eyes wild.

_You don't want to see your family hurt do you, Isabella? Charlie, Renee…we could do it slowly and painfully, if you're feeling extra defiant. And when we get to you, you will watch how humans scream._

"No!" I whispered. "No, please," I begged.

_Come to me, Bella. Come outside. Get out of the city. Into the forest. We will find you._

Nearby, a cell phone buzzed shrilly. I glanced at it a moment.

_Now, Isabella. The Cullen's will be better off if they don't know. They will be much, much safer._

"Edward," I whispered. "I can't."

I felt like I was going crazy, speaking out loud to a voice only I could hear. But this is what they wanted. This is how it was supposed to be. If I could only know why, maybe I could fight it.

I _can_ fight this. I will. I have to. For Charlie and Renee, for the Cullen's. For Edward.

I studied the room one last time before slipping out the window.

I squeezed my eyes closed, imagining what Edward would come back to.

An empty room; a missing Bella.

He would be devastated and he would blame himself.

I almost went back. Almost. But Charlie and Renee. They were defenseless against Nathaniel, the Volturi. They had to be my priority.

I would see Edward again. I would fight. And I would win.

I had to.

I shivered into the cold night, but I knew it was for other reasons than the un-characteristically cold weather. I had no idea what I was walking into.

My dreams, if they were any indication, told me that I had nothing good waiting for me. In my dreams, I had been this cold woman. Devoid of emotion, of humanity. Was she who I would become in time, or was she what they wanted me to see—wanted me to believe I was? I didn't know and every step towards the city limits felt like a slow step to my demise.

I ached for Edward, for his hand in mine, a squeeze of reassurance a smile of encouragement. I imagined instead that he was next to me, telling me I was doing the right thing. In reality, I knew he would not say that. He would have made me stay, he would have told me we would figure this out together, that there had to be another way.

But I had realized it last night; there was no other way. There had been Edward, laying on the bed earnestly trying to reassure me that the Cullen's could beat the Volturi, all the while visions of what the Volturi could do flashed through his mind. I could see it all and I knew he was not convinced we could win at all. He was merely trying to put up a brave front. And maybe, a long time ago, that's what I needed to hear. But now life was different, I was different and circumstances were different. And my family was in danger; both families, living and dead. There would never be another way and I had accepted that, unlike Carlisle. I had "seen" his idea in my dream. He had wanted to try to change me, all the way. He thought, if they bit me again there was the possibility that I would become a complete vampire—my hybridness would disappear. But I had seen it happen. I had seen Carlisle bite me. I had seen myself die. There was no other way. I just hadn't thought it would happen so soon. I thought I had more time.

At least I was able to show Edward what he meant to me..._really_ meant to me, before I had to leave.

And you will again, in time, I told myself.

I passed the sign telling me to "come back soon!" to whatever sad town I was in and laughed bitterly under my breath, wondering if Edward was back in the hotel room yet. Had Alice seen anything? Was that her on the cell phone I'd ignored, calling to warn us? What would Edward do?

God, he is going to feel like crap.

I couldn't shake the feelings of guilt this time. As the forest loomed closer, my shoulders slumped lower and the fear I should have been feeling was upstaged by my guilt and sadness. And anger.

"Where are you?" I demanded my voice clear. My guilt was the perfect coat of bravery.

I entered the first line of trees, my eyes sharp and focused. When I saw no one, I kept walking.

"Show yourself. You bribed me out here. What are you waiting for?" I yelled into the darkness.

"Hello Bella," sneered a voice. A voice that was all too familiar to me, but was not the deep, low voice I had expected.

I turned.

"Victoria," I spat, my face contorting into an expression of disgust.

"So we meet again," she answered, a hand on her hip, a smile on her lips, her red hair spilling down her back like a cape.

"What are you doing here? Where is Nathaniel?"

"Oh," she laughed slightly, amused. "You didn't really think someone like Nathaniel would actually do any of the dirty work, did you?"

"He changed me, didn't he? Isn't that dirty enough?" I answered my muscles tensing.

"I see you've learned something new in our time apart. But no, changing humans is quite amusing. I can't even imagine what it's like to make a hybrid," Victoria sighed almost enviously and sneered at me.

"What are you here to do, Victoria?"

"To take you to Nathaniel," she replied simply.

_You lucky bitch. _I flinched, realizing quickly I was hearing her thoughts.

"I can take myself," I replied bitterly. Victoria laughed loudly.

"Oh no, no you can't," she replied. "You don't know where he is. And he would like to keep it that way," she replied. She took something out of her pocket.

"Take this," she ordered, opening her palm to show a small, round, white pill.

"I don't accept candy from strangers, Victoria. Or from killers, for that matter," I replied, giving her a disgusted look.

"You're going to soon find yourself a hypocrite, Bella. And I'm going to remind you of this moment. Take it," she said more forcefully.

_So self-righteous. I can't wait to see her kill._

I crouched low, my eyes narrowed into slits at the tone of her thoughts.

"I wonder who would win in a fight between you and me, Victoria? I bet you're the hair pulling type," and without a seconds hesitation, I leapt at the shocked red haired vampire, tackled her to the forest floor and punched her square in the jaw.

It felt good.

That's all I meant to do, really. I had had enough of fearing Victoria, the schoolyard bully. I knew I was stronger than her. And I wanted to show her I wasn't timid human Bella anymore.

But as I went to leap back up, Victoria grabbed me by the leg and flipped me back down. I smiled at her, happy at the opportunity she was giving me. I grabbed her effortlessly and lifted her body above my head, flinging her at a nearby pine tree. Her body connected with a resounding boom and she slid down slowly to a sitting position, her face looking at me in disbelief.

"Get up," I called out, grabbing the fallen pill.

"I can't, you've got me pinned," she called back, annoyed.

I spun around quickly.

"It's not me," I replied quietly. "Who's there?" I asked, raising my voice.

He stepped out from the trees about 5 yards away, a smirk on his face.

"I knew you'd need backup, Victoria. I told him. Hello, Bella," he said, his voice going from accusing to pleasant.

"I should have known you'd be around, Chase," I greeted back, tensed and ready.

"I was about to show her what happens when she messes with me!" shrilled Victoria from the pine tree. We both ignored her.

"Where's Cullen?" he asked darkly, his eyes suddenly darting around the darkness.

"Not here," I replied.

"My, my, you've grown assertive, haven't you, Bella Swan? I suspect you've found out what you are? What you can do?"

"I know more than I did," I replied vaguely. I fingered the pill in my palm.

"I take this pill and what happens?" I demanded.

"You wake up in Nathaniel's place of residence," replied Chase, his eyes amused as Victoria continued to struggle against the tree.

"With the Volturi? In Italy? And then what? What does he want me there for?"

"Don't know, Swan. Why are you even here, why are you making this easy for him? Why aren't you fighting this with the Cullen's?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"Because I can't," and with that, I popped the pill into my mouth, swallowing deeply.

I heard Victoria cackle loudly as my head instantly started to swim.

"You didn't even get to tell her that Nathaniel is delivering her boyfriend for us to play with!"

I heard the words as my knees buckled beneath me.

Edward.

I groaned inside, my heart breaking. Had I just placed Edward in the hands of his angriest enemy?

But my head was filling with haze and I couldn't think coherently anymore.

I sank back into the thick fog and closed my eyes.

And then I was swallowed by dreams.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_I was ripping out Edward's flesh, piece by piece, laughing hysterically as he stared at me in mute horror._

_Nearby, a man in a black cape watched approvingly, his face proud as a father._

"_You're turning out to be too good at this, Isabella," he said, his voice deep._

"_This is fun!" I replied, digging into Edward's arm and pulling hand. I watched as he closed his eyes in pain and lowered his head._

_Something flashed through me._

"_It's a game, Edward," I said quietly, my voice so low the man in the black cape could not hear me._

_Edward's eyes opened and he stared at me hard._

"_It was a game, Bella, but if you don't stop, you're going to forget," he replied. I pulled out another chunk of flesh absently._

"_I'm just trying to win, Edward. I won't forget," I replied, throwing the flesh at the ground, into the growing pile._

"_You already have," he replied sadly._

_His body colapsed to the hard concrete._

_Game over._

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I screamed, sweat pouring down my face and opened my eyes.

_Welcome to the world of the living, Isabella._

I tried to sit up, but found I was restrained. My eyes wide, I looked down to see my wrists, ankles and torso was being held to a thick slab of raised marble by iron restraints. I pulled at them, knowing it would be no good.

"Don't you mean the dead?" I replied bitterly to the voice I knew was Nathanial's.

_No, I mean the living. I will show you, dear Isabella, how it is we can truly live under our circumstances. You will learn quickly, I can see already._

"You promised Chase Edward," I said flatly, examining my surroundings, which were nothing more than a small concrete room. No windows. No lights. Nothing.

_Edward Cullen is much smarter than Chase._

"Does that mean he's okay?" I asked eagerly, his safety the only thing I cared much about.

_Edward Cullen will not be okay until he finds you and gets you back. And that will never happen. Edward Cullen will never again be okay._

I bit my lip, frustrated. How much of this was he saying to get to me? What was the truth? Edward would be okay again, as long as Chase didn't have him. I moved on.

"Why don't you show yourself? Why are you still in my head?" I demanded.

_In time, Isabella, there will be no need to use our connection. Right now, though, you are dangerous. Do you realize how powerful you are? I had no idea when I changed you that this would happen; that you would become what you are. This has never happened before; you are fascinating. The Volturi has taken a…special interest in you, Isabella._

"So what do you want me for? My powers? You want to use me as a weapon like the hybrid in Mexico?"

There was a long silence. I thought he had disappeared. But then:

_Ah. Jasper Whitlock. Of course he would have spoken of poor Michael Smith. Michael killed thousands of men before he was…put out of commission._

"You killed him?"I demanded, my revulsion gaining on my fear.

_He killed himself._

"Are you going to kill me?"

_I hope never to have to, Isabella. You are very special to me. _

I remained quiet for a moment, gathering my thoughts, my questions.

"How long do I have to stay here, like this?" I asked.

_Not long. As we speak, new accommodations are being prepared. There are many of the Volturi who are ecstatic to meet you. You are an enigma, Isabella._

I didn't reply. Instead, my head tilted back on the marble and I stared up at the dark ceiling. I felt the tears trickle down my cheeks before I knew I was crying. Silently, I allowed it, happy Nathaniel could not see me.

How was I going to fight? Me against the Volturi. Was it possible for me, Bella Swan, to go up against the powerful authority and win?

I let out a breath, feeling more helpless than ever under the iron restraints. I didn't even know what I could do, not really. Everyone kept talking about how powerful I was and yet…I didn't know myself, I didn't know what I could even do. But I was armed with the knowledge that they were at least afraid of me; they must have their reasons in putting me in a concrete cell, strapped down.

I must be capable of great things. Or at the very least, I held the unknown. That was good enough for me, if it was instilling this kind of fear in the most powerful vampire family.

I would have to hold onto that confidence and trust it.

Hang on, Bella.

Hang on and play the part.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wasn't sure how much time actually went by—time isn't something I'd cared much about measuring since I'd been turned--until very recently that is. It could have been hours later, if could have been days later…but my eyes opened and I knew something was different. Immediately, I realized I was no longer restrained. Limbs free, I quickly jumped to my feet and crouched low and alert, my eyes scanning my new surroundings.

It was a room, not unlike my old bedroom in Forks, with a bed, a dresser and a desk. The biggest difference was that one whole wall was made of glass. I was like a freak on display at the circus.

This was worse than the concrete room.

I shook my head and approached the window slowly, peering out. Turning my head to the right, I saw what looked to be an extremely long grey corridor with a black door at the end. To the left, the grey corridor ended at a concrete wall. Across from my "room" were two doors, both closed.

Cautiously, I lifted my hand to the glass and tapped, testing it's strength. It didn't budge. Harder now, I hit at the glass. Finally, with all the strength I could muster, I hit at the wall—finally throwing my whole body into the action.

The glass didn't even shutter.

I stepped back, my head low. That would have been too easy.

Why were they, the Volturi, so scared of me?

I found the small bed again and sat on the edge, biting at my nail in thought. Standing again, I took a step to the desk and opened the one drawer on the side.

Inside were sheets of paper and a pen. I furrowed my brow.

Why?

I closed the drawer again without touching the items and glanced at the dresser. I shook my head and sat on the bed again.

I was starting to feel a bit weakened. I hadn't eaten since I'd hunted with Emmett days ago. I wondered if they were going to feed me or allow me to get weak.

I didn't have to wonder long.

_One more day, Isabella. One more day and we will meet. You will be in the right state to meet your new family. Are you pleased with your room?_

"It's wonderful," I replied sarcastically, automatically glancing at the glass in front of me. But, of course, there was no one to be seen. "Why one more day? Why not now?"

_Ah, questions, questions. Some will be answered soon. In one more day, Isabella, you will be weaker than you are today. We don't know the extent of your powers just yet; therefore we plan to play it safe._

Play.

It's a game, Bella. Remember to play by their rules, I told myself.

"One more day," I replied simply, shrugging away the fear that chilled up and down my spine.

Their rules. For now.

* * *

**A/N: Deep breath! It's getting intense! The response to this story has been wonderful and I'm loving all the positive reviews...please let me know what you thought of this chapter. I have a feeling I may be getting some hate mail from those of you who are pissed that I'm taking Bella away from Edward...if makes you feel any better, we'll hear from him soon. AT least they has their moment, right?**

**Oh! Sorry I didn't post last Friday (as I almost always do!) but life has once again been getting in the way of writing time. To make up for it, I wrote an extra long chapter :D**

**Now go review! Tell me what you think of the direction of this story...are you enjoying it? Are you freaked out? Do you think I'm evil? Tell, tell!**


	23. Chapter 22 Broken

**A/N: Hey guys—have I mentioned that we're getting low on remaining chapters? There aren't many left in my story, as the pace is quickening and an end isn't toooo far away. After this chapter, I have about two maybe three more in mind before I believe this story will have reached its natural end. **

**I love Sleeping to Dream, but I am also eager to move on. I have so many Twilight related stories swirling around in my head and I'm ready to get some of them out. I hope you'll stay with me after Sleeping to Dream concludes; you guys have been awesome. **

**But this isn't good-bye yet. Still a lot to happen, so don't be sad! Now go read this chapter :)**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty-Two Broken**

---

Slumped against the hotel room wall, his head in his hands, Edward sat waiting. Alice had told him not to move a muscle. Actually, her exact words had been, "Don't do anything stupid. I'm on my way. Edward, don't you dare move!"

But she didn't have to worry this time. Edward pulled his knees up to his chest and hit his forehead against his kneecaps. Hard. The cracking sound resonated through the room.

Around him, the room was a wreck. Every piece of furniture had been ripped apart in his furious attempt at finding a clue to what had happened after he had left the room. Any trace at all. But there was nothing. No sign of a forced entry. No hint at a struggle. No note from Bella. No note from anyone. Just the suitcase. The suitcase and the missing clothes.

Edward glanced dully at the note he had left for Bella. He had found it next to the pillow signifying, he assumed, that she had read it. And then what? He glanced over at the window. The curtains were pulled back, and the window unlocked. Had someone come through the window? Pulled her through and shut it again? Or had she…?

When he had opened the door to their hotel room hours before, he had been literally walking on cloud nine. He had located what was touted as Montana's best coffee shop and purchased a steaming cup of their specialty hot chocolate along with an assortment of bagels, muffins and croissants, not sure on which one Bella would be craving_. _

_A smile on his lips, he pushed open the door with his knee, his hands full of baked goods, an expectant smile on his lips. Edward could not wait to hold his Bella again, feel her naked body pressed against his. He couldn't wait to make love to her, to hear her call out his name, he couldn't wait to kiss her, to breath her. Even being away from her for thrity minutes caused his heart to ache. He would not make this a habit, he thought, glancing at the bag in his hand with a wry smile. At least not yet._

_His eyes focused quickly on the empty bed and with his smile still in place, he glanced towards the small hallway leading to the restroom. The door had been closed._

"_Bella?" he called, setting the bags down on the nightstand and pulling the lid off of the steaming cup of hot chocolate._

"_Love? Everything okay?"_

_No answer. His forehead creasing slightly, he took the few steps to the bathroom door and knocked lightly, but his heart had already sunk deep into his chest. He couldn't hear a peep from the other side. Edward threw open the door and found it empty._

"_Bella?" he called, knowing her sensitive vampire ears could hear him from much further away than the hotel._

_Nothing._

_As he approached the window, something on the floor caught his attention. Bella's suitcase—rather, the suitcase he had packed quickly for Bella just a day ago. It had been pulled out from beneath the bed and opened. Clothes had been pulled out. Edward was frozen for half a second and then, moving quickly, he completed a quick assessment. _

_He discovered that exactly one pair of jeans and one white t-shirt was missing. Nothing else. _

Edward pulled himself back from the recent memory, switching instead to his frenzied conversation with Alice. His cell phone had been buzzing nonstop since he had entered the room, but he had ignored it up until the point he realized Bella was nowhere to be found.

"_Alice. What's happened?" he demanded, grabbing at the phone, his eyes still darting around the room, the hot chocolate spilled and forgotten on the carpet. But he knew; she was gone._

"_Victoria and Chase. I saw them, waiting in the woods, close to you, excited," she answered quickly, "Bella?" she questioned._

"_Not here," Answered Edward, his back against the wall, his eyes closed. Slowly, he sank to the carpet._

"_Any sign of a...?"_

"_Not even a little. Some clothes are missing," he answered._

"_She left?" whispered Alice, her voice shaking._

"_I think she did," Edward muttered._

_Why Bella?_

"_Edward, you know she'd have a reason. They must have threatened her!" Alice said fiercely._

_Edward didn't respond._

"_Edward don't do anything stupid. I'm on my way. Edward, don't move!"_

And he didn't, not really. He couldn't. He felt numb, cut-off from the reality of the situation. He knew he should be out there, looking for Victoria, for Chase. But he couldn't seem to get himself to stand. He couldn't move.

Bella was gone.

And she may very well have been the one to leave. Voluntarily.

--

It was a huge room, circular in nature. Four torches lit up the darkness, each spaced evenly around Bella, who stood firmly in front of the doorway she had entered through a second ago. Looking around the room, she saw quickly that it was completely empty, save for a large marble chair opposite her, at the far end of the room and another door to her right.

She wasn't sure what to do.

Nathaniel's voice had directed her from her room, through the complicated maze of dark, empty hallways and to the circle room only minutes before and then faded when she had reached the black door and entered inside.

Now she stood alone, wanting so badly to shiver. Yet she held herself together, knowing she had to count on her appearance, on the way she spoke and the way she acted. She had to not mess this up. It was time for answers, yes. But it was also time for her to show the Volturi that they _did_ need to fear her. That she was a force to be reckoned with.

She just wished she didn't feel so weak.

And then, the door opened. Bella straightened her spine and stood as upright as possible, hoping she didn't look as afraid as she was feeling.

"Isabella," hissed that all too familiar voice as a shadow slipped into the room and turned to her.

"Nathaniel," she said back, her voice coming out strong and sure. There was a low laugh as he approached her, his stature immediately intimidating her, causing her to glance quickly at the door behind her, measuring the distance.

"You can't escape, mi bella," said Nathaniel, stopping himself five feet away. Bella looked back at the caped figure, unable to make out his facial features from the flickering shadows around her.

"I wasn't hoping too," she lied, facing him full on.

"My, Isabella. You are even lovelier than the day I changed you," he said softly.

Bella raised her chin, a frown on her lips.

"Why did you change me, Nathaniel?" she didn't feel like beating around the bush. Not now.

"I was lonely," he replied simply. Bella's mouth fell open.

"You changed me, _me_, because you were lonely? Why the hell did you chose me?" she asked, incredulously.

"Lonely and jealous, to be more precise. I wanted you, very specifically. From the moment Victoria came to me and told me of the Cullen's…pet. The pet they dared kill one of us to protect. I had to know more about you. I had always been a bit…jealous…of Carlisle and his family, you see. Of how they lived, how they worked as a family, their dynamics. I have never been able to have that for myself. I am part of the Volturi family, yes, but I have always been too much of a danger to let out and about…because of what I do. I have always been more of a weapon, in their eyes," Nathaniel stopped and smirked at something. "It makes for a lonely existence. You see, mi bella, all I have to do is touch someone and it means a certain death…whether it's a quick and sudden death or a long and torturous one as a hybrid, that is up to me," Bella glanced down and noticed for the first time the gloves Nathaniel wore over his hands. She shivered inwardly, wrapping an arm protectively around her midriff.

"But when your gift brings guaranteed death, you're never the most popular of family members…until of course, an enemy is deadly enough. Then suddenly, I am their valued family member," bitterness coated his words as he snarled slightly towards the door, his eyes narrowing.

"A family member that is preferred to reside far, far away, but available whenever the others desire. That has been my existence, Isabella, for over five hundred years. When the Volturi--Aro--would call, I would come. I would turn their enemies into hybrids. I would watch as they destroyed themselves, stuck between worlds, driven to madness—"

"Is that what will happen to me?" asked Bella, her voice clear.

"Not if everything I suspect about you is true, Isabella. Victoria first approached me about you, hoping I would report to the Volturi and have you killed…have the Cullen's wiped out. But I kept the information to myself and travelled to your town myself. Like I said, I'd always been jealous of Carlsile's happy existence. He was the epitome of everything I would have wanted to be. Everything I had tried once to be," Nathaniel stopped his face in shadows, but his voice cold.

"When I set eyes upon you, dear Isabella, it was after your Cullen's had left you, you were broken, dead. A zombie of sorts. I couldn't believe the Cullen's could have been so cruel, to leave you like that. I had to know what had happened. After what Victoria had told me, I had been left believing that they would have died for you, especially Edward Cullen. And so I found the Cullen's; they were not all together anymore but I was able to watch them all, I listened and I learned. Their love for you was much deeper than I could have ever known and things had grown quite complicated. I never had anything against Carlisle, exactly. But as I watched, I grew more spiteful to what he had...for it highlighted everything that I lacked in my existence. And suddenly, I found myself wanting very badly to sabotage his fortune. I wanted him to suffer. And it suddenly seemed perfect to show him through his one son; Edward. I knew if I took you from him, if I condemned you to the life of a hybrid, Edward and the rest of the Cullen's would know how I felt. They would know an eternity of pain.

"And so I made a deal with Victoria. She brings me Isabella Swan and I will condemn her to a life of hell. Victoria was elated…it was better than death. So we did exactly that. Do you remember, Isabella, the pain you endured?"

Bella shook her head, her eyes wide.

"I don't remember," she replied softly, only lying partially. The flashes of memory would never disappear. The screams, the red hair. The fire.

"You screamed and withered for hours…days, I presume. And we left you. I didn't know if you would make it through, but I didn't yet care. I felt happy about what I did, avenged, almost. And then, it came to my attention that you possessed…interesting abilities. Most hybrids, you see, are immune to receiving special powers. They're strength is their power, their ferocity, their ruthlessness. But that is all. You, my dear one, appear to hold much, much more. You are immune to those with powers around you, so far. We had one of our most deadly members of the Volturi in to visit you last night. Even asleep and in a weakened state, you were able to unconsciously resist her deadly power. You are baffling. What else can you do, dear one?"

_I have visions of the future. I read minds._

But instead Bella asked another question.

"So at first you didn't care what happened to me…but because you all are convinced I have some magical powers, you want me around?" she asked, her eyes narrowed.

"You may be the most powerful vampire in the world, Isabella Swan," replied Nathaniel.

"That's ridiculous. And I'm not a vampire. I'm going to eventually go crazy and probably kill myself," she reminded Nathaniel sarcastically.

"Dear Isabella. Do you honestly think that the Volturi will allow you to destroy yourself? You could be their ultimate weapon. And I made you! You won't be a hybrid long…Aro will be sure to grant me permission when—" Nathaniel cut himself off with a small laugh but not before Bella picked up on what he was saying.

"What do you mean, Nathaniel? Can you also change hybrids into vampires?" she asked, forcing her voice to sound neutral. Bored, even.

"I have a few abilities many aren't aware of," he replied with a shrug. "Now. Some members of your new family would like to meet you, dear one, if you're up for it."

Bella knew she didn't really have a choice in the matter, but she really didn't care. She suddenly felt filled with hope, though she carefully tucked the nugget of knowledge carefully away, saving it to examine when she had time to think. She stepped into the room another foot and stared Nathaniel in what she thought was his eye, as his face was still shadowed.

As though she'd missed some important cue, the door opened and in walked three hooded figures. Bella watched as the two smaller figured stopped where they stood, near Nathaniel, but the other quickly approached her. Bella held herself still but braced herself mentally.

As the figure approached, she watched the hood come down. Bella quickly recognized Aro from the pictures that hung in Carlisle's study.

He smiled at her warmly and held out his hand.

"Bella Swan. I have heard much about you. May I shake your hand?"

Bella nodded quickly and held out her hand. Aro grabbed it up greedily, his eyes sparkling in an anticipation Bella couldn't place.

He gazed at her as he held onto her hand, not shaking it but grasping tightly. Bella attempted to pull her hand back but she was definitely not the one in control.

"Well well. I didn't think for a second this could be right. But it seems, Bella Swan, that you are immune to my power," he spoke slowly, his eyes trained on Bella's face like she knew a secret and she wasn't willing to share.

"I told you," spoke a new voice, a voice from one of the hoods.

"Hush, Jane," replied Aro, his eyes still intently studying Bella's face. He turned swiftly, his eyes sweeping the two hooded figured behind him.

"Anything?" he demanded. Bella watched as both the hoods swung back and forth.

Nathaniel just smirked.

"What does this mean for me?" Bella asked, bravely.

Aro turned slowly back to Bella, his eyes alight.

"It means, lovely one," he said quietly, "that you shall soon be one of us. You will join our family."

"Does that mean…?" trailed Nathaniel quietly, from his spot next to the smaller of the hooded figures. Jane, Bella realized.

"Yes," whispered Aro. "Yes," he repeated louder.

"Bella, you are merely a hybrid right now. Stuck. Waiting for certain death, your powers are not to their full potential. You must be vampire to truly discover what you can do."

"You can do that?" she asked, her heart in her throat.

Aro laughed and shook his head.

"Oh no, dear one. I cannot. I have but one gift. Our Nathaniel here…he controls the changes. Much like he was able to turn you halfway; he can also finish the process. And when he does, you will be the most—"

Aro was cut off by a clearing of the throat. He paused and glanced quickly at the figure beside Jane and then nodded once, quickly.

"You will be complete, Bella Swan," he finished. "You will be one of us."

Bella nodded.

This was it. This is how she could be okay again. She just had to wait. And then escape…somehow. She would be with Edward again. She could be "normal" and not have to worry about going insane; about killing those around her. She would see Edward again. Her heart sang.

This could work.

But first, she had to allow Nathaniel to change her. She had to make it through another transformation. And she couldn't let on what she planned on doing.

"Bella, tell me. What else can you do?" asked Aro, his eyes gleeful, as though waiting to be told it would be his birthday every single day.

Bella considered for a moment. Would this hurt her? How much should she tell? She wanted them to continue to think it a good idea to transform her into a vampire. But she didn't want them to know everything. She needed a weapon. _My weapon_, she realized, _is their weapons._ _Like with Chase, Jasper and Edward powers, I can take their powers and use it against them. If I could figure out how exactly I do that._ Bella knew that she must not reveal that she could use others powers. Instead she gave him this:

"I hear thoughts," she said finally, focusing on Aro, hoping her power would not fail her now.

_Can you now? Well perhaps I shouldn't be so free with my thoughts around you, dear one. Do the Cullen's know of this?_

Bella nodded once.

"They do," she replied.

"Impressive," muttered Aro. "What else?" he wondered.

"I dream the future," she relied. "I saw myself here before I was."

"Interesting. That is why you came here so willingly. You knew it would happen, regardless. I wonder how that power would translate over when she's turned, Nathaniel? Would it? As she will not be able to sleep anymore."

Nathaniel only shrugged his eyes on Bella.

"You are truly fascinating, Bella. Many vampires don't even have one power. Those that do, have never had more than one special ability. And never have I known of a hybrid or vampire to possess multiple powers."

But Bella was barely listening.

She could not mess this up.

"Aro," hissed a voice again from beside Jane and Nathaniel. Aro turned.

"Perhaps the girl is immune now, to Nathaniel's powers. She is able to block the rest of us. Why shouldn't that he true for Nathaniel's abilities?"

They all turned to stare at Bella. Bella felt her heart sink.

What if he was right?

"You raise an interesting point".

"Nathaniel?" Aro beckoned. Nathaniel strode forward.

"Wait, now?" demanded Bella, suddenly feeling frantic.

"Do it, Nathaniel. Now," ordered Aro. "You may feel…extreme pain," he added pleasantly to Bella, as though reporting that it would be a sunny day.

Bella shrunk back from the approaching Nathanial.

"Isabella," he said, quickly peeling off the black leather glove that adorned his right hand. He reached for her and she stopped moving.

"Isabella. Stop that," Bella saw that he could not move his hand any closer. She was blocking him from touching her skin, as though an invisible shield lay around her body.

"I…" Bella started. And then she stopped as Alice's voice ran through her head…something she had said months ago:

_If the Volturi ever tried to bother you, you'd be able to hold them all back! No one would be able to touch you! _

But this is the only way, she realized.

"Fascinating," she heard Aro murmur from far away.

It's now or never, she told herself. Closing her eyes tightly and bracing herself, she focused on relaxing and letting down the shield.

When the cold hand touched her arm, Bella heard screaming. It wasn't until a few minutes had passed and she found herself on the floor, that she realized it was her.

--

When Victoria walked into the hotel room, Edward showed no surprise.

"What took you so long?" he asked dully from his spot on the floor. The time had been creeping quickly by and Edward had been convinced they weren't going to come. 48 hours had passed. But he was patient…and Alice was right.

"You knew we were coming?" she asked, as Chase emerged from behind her, his hand thrust forward. Edward felt the effects of Chase's abilities quickly, his limbs suddenly stiff, unable to move.

"Wasn't planning on going anywhere," muttered Edward, his head low.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" demanded Chase. Victoria grinned gleefully.

"He knows," she responded. "You know, right? Your little hybrid girlfriend is with the Volturi now. But do you know that she came to us…willingly? What did you do to her, Cullen? Couldn't get away fast enough," sneered Victoria. Edward closed his eyes. So it was true?

"So you're giving up?" Chase demanded, kicking at a pillow on the floor. "You're just going to let the Volturi win?" He almost sounded angry.

"Not much else I can do at the moment," replied Edward, motioning with his eyes at his frozen limbs.

"But you didn't even try. You just sat there and…gave up," his voice accused.

Edward glared up at the man he had turned into a vampire so many years ago.

"What the hell do you care?" asked Edward, his own anger mounting.

"The girl saved your life not too long ago, if you'll recall. I saw the way she risked everything for you. You're too cowardly to do the same?"

"This has nothing to do with being a coward," replied Edward.

"She more of a pain in the ass than she's worth?" he continued, his eyes flashing.

"Shut up, man. You have no idea what you're dealing with," spoke Edward, his voice deadly.

"I get it. A hybrid is barely worth a thing. She'll probably end up slaughtering your entire family, anyways."

Edward growled low in his throat and Victoria clapped her hands together in glee, her eyes bright. Edward was disgusted. She was loving this.

"She said it herself," spoke Edward, glaring over at Victoria, "Bella left me willingly to go to Italy."

Chase smirked.

"Italy? No. Half the Volturi is _here_—not far from your place in Forks, actually. Your hybrid has been a special case. And Nathaniel has had a…house there for a while now. Think he likes the weather," Chase said dryly, rolling his eyes at something.

Edward raised his head slowly, a smile playing on his lips, his eyes shining with something Chase couldn't place—until, of course, it was too late.

Out of seemingly nowhere, Chase was knocked over and pinned to the ground. His abilities suddenly interrupted, Edward was able to jump to his feet, his limbs back in working order.

He ran for the door.

"Go, Edward!" yelled a voice. Edward only gave Jasper, Emmett and Alice one quick fleeting backwards glance as he sprinted from the hotel.

Chase and Victoria were finished, he was sure. And if they had problems, Jacob and his friends were nearby, their teeth sharp and ready.

Alice was brilliant. He would have to buy her something shiny later. He had been convinced that the next step was to fly to Italy, were he'd presumed Bella had been taken. But Alice had had a better idea. To wait and get it from Chase and Victoria when they thought he had given up.

_I won't ever give up on Bella, they were fools to think I would._

Edward ripped the plane ticket from his pocket and tossed it into a mailbox he sped by. He turned his direction towards Forks and ran, his body becoming just a blur.

----

The fire licked her entire body and she was sure she was in hell.

* * *

**A/N--Reviews are love and I tried to get back to everyone that commented last chapter! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Keep 'em coming!**


	24. Chapter 23 This is Hell

**I'm sorry. It's been far too long. I hope you guys still remember what's been going on in Sleeping to Dream. Quick end of chapter 22 recap:**

_Chase and Victoria were finished, he was sure. And if they had problems, Jacob and his friends were nearby, their teeth sharp and ready._

_Alice was brilliant. He would have to buy her something shiny later. He had been convinced that the next step was to fly to Italy, were he'd presumed Bella had been taken. But Alice had had a better idea. To wait and get it from Chase and Victoria when they thought he had given up._

_I won't ever give up on Bella, they were fools to think I would._

_Edward ripped the plane ticket from his pocket and tossed it into a mailbox he sped by. He turned his direction towards Forks and ran, his body becoming just a blur._

_----_

_The fire licked her entire body and she was sure she was in hell._

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Three **This is Hell**

Bella's eyes opened. Quiet. Everything was so silent.

She felt like hell. She felt like she was _in_ hell. Her whole body ached; her veins were pumping fire, screaming to be released, screaming for freedom. Warily, she focused her eyes, wondering what had happened in the time she remembered screaming until now. How much time had gone by? Had she been sleeping? Was she still a hybrid?

"Get her away! Get her out of here!" yelled a voice, breaking the silence. It was as though a switch had been flipped. Suddenly, Bella's ears were assaulted with voices, noise. She cringed inwardly as the fire started pumping faster.

"You expect me to touch her?" retorted a voice, full of fear and indignation.

"How did this happen, what the hell happened?" yelled another voice. Bella attempted to turn her head, but she couldn't. Lead and fire danced together through her blood. And if she moved, she was afraid it would be her Undoing.

"Get Nathaniel out of here," ordered a voice. _Aro?_ Bella wondered. Why_? What had happened to Nathaniel?_ She struggled to back-track her memories. She remembered his skin touching hers. Then the exploding fire. And then the screaming. But it hadn't just been her, had it? The screams, they had surrounded her, engulfed her. Her voice had not been alone.

"Everyone out!" ordered a voice. "Get out. Until we figure out what happened, this room is out of bounds."

"We need to get her to the glass room," said another voice, filled with fright.

"And would you like to be the one to take her there?" the first voice answered coldly.

"Nathaniel is dead," stated a voice. Bella's body jerked, the fire burned hotter. "We cannot leave her here."

Dead? He was dead? But how…? Had she…?

"Cover her up. We will summon two of the lesser to take her. We will see what happens."

_Why can't I move?_ Bella wanted to scream, but she couldn't bear to open her mouth. Everything hurt. _Am I changing?_

"Did she…is she changed?" asked a voice, echoing Bella's own thoughts.

"She's changing. I don't know if she will make it all the way. Nathaniel may not have had enough time. If not, we will dispose of her immediately. She is far too dangerous to keep as a hybrid—especially now if all he's done is speed up the process."

"But the Cullen's.."

"No. They cannot have her back. If she hasn't been fully changed, she will deteriorate quickly. She will be dead in a matter of days. And in those days she would cause much death, perhaps exposing us as she does. We cannot have it."

"Get the lesser in here. Now. We need her behind that glass immediately."

Bella felt something touch her body as her sight went dark. Realizing that something had been thrown over her body, she attempted to move.

"Jane!" yelled a voice.

Silence.

"I can't," replied Jane's familiar voice. Defeated. She sounded utterly defeated.

"I've changed my mind," said Aro's voice. "Leave her here. Until we know. Everyone out!" he roared. Bella heard a flurry of activity as footsteps run towards the door. And then, nothing.

The fire had subsided enough for Bella to move her hand. Slowly, she pulled the blanket from over her head and quickly surveyed the room. She was alone. But she knew she didn't have much time.

She had to get out. If the change didn't work, they were going to kill her. If it did…Bella's mind wavered. If it did, she didn't know what they had planned for her. If they deemed her too dangerous, if her powers really did only increase, Bella wasn't sure they'd let her live. Of course, they would have to fight her. And if she really was as powerful as they had speculated…

Bella was not ready to give up.

Suddenly, the fire shot through her veins again, but this time, it filled her with an energy, a renewed sense of purpose. And with knowledge. Bella was in the process of hopping to her feet when it hit her.

She had changed.

She was a vampire.

And…she had control.

Yanking open the door she had entered only a few hours before, Bella strode the hallway, approaching the room where she had been kept.

"Aro?" she questioned, seeing the robed figure staring into the room from outside the glassed wall. If he was surprised at the sound of her voice, he didn't show it. His head did not turn her way.

Bella hesitated. She knew…she was certain that the door across from her room held her escape. She was almost free.

_Dead. He's gone. But can she now…?_

Bella took a look at Aro. She could still hear thoughts. Did that mean she could also still manipulate emotions? Could she still use Chase's power? What about blocking? Bella closed her eyes briefly and sent out a wave of calm.

"Yes, you've still got it," replied Aro with a small smile. "I can feel the calm sweeping me. But stop. I must feel this."

Bella automatically stopped what she was doing.

"How did…how did Nathaniel die?" she questioned.

"Somehow…when he touched you…you sent his own power back at him. It was too much, unexpected. He has changed hybrids before, yes. But no one like you. No one with your abilities."

Bella stared into the room, feeling oddly sad for the man she didn't know, for the man who took away her life. She didn't expect the Volturi to feel anything for one another and yet, she realized, they were a family too. In a messed up way, they were not unlike the Cullen's.

"You're leaving us?" he asked, his voice sounding incredibly weak, old.

"You're not going to stop me?" she asked, surprised and wary.

"There is no point, Isabella. We will not be able to stop you. I am sure of that now. But tell me, what else can you do?" His head turned to her, a small spark in his dark eyes. His sadness did not hinder his curiosity.

"I believe I acquire others abilities," she replied. It didn't matter now. One move and she could stop him dead. "Any power that's been used on me, I seem to now possess."

Aro's eyes shot to her face.

"No," he whispered.

Bella nodded slowly, knowing how much that would scare him. Did he not say that one of his most powerful family members had come into her room? How many others had attempted to hurt her with their powers? She saw how Aro was frightened by this. She was too.

She had no idea what she could do.

"And Nathaniel's ability?" he demanded.

"I don't yet know," she shuddered slightly at the possibility. If she did, she would never again be able to touch anyone's skin.

Edward, her heart cried.

No.

She had to not think about it yet.

"Shall we find out what you can do?" he asked, his voice suddenly clear.

"What do you mean?" she asked hesitantly.

"Before you leave, don't you want to know what you can do? I see who you are, Bella Swan, and you are not a person who desires to harm others. But if you walk out from this house right now…you are putting every single person, every vampire, in danger. If you've…acquired Nathaniel…or Jane's abilities? You don't want to hurt anyone, Bella, least of all any of the Cullen's."

Bella considered. She knew Aro was probably trying to get more time with her…trying to cook up a new plan. But what could he possibly do to keep her there? And he was right; she did need to know what she was capable of….before anyone was hurt.

"Okay," she agreed. Aro smiled warmly.

"I will get the guinea pigs. Meet you back here," he spoke.

"Guinea pigs? Wait…" but Aro was gone before she could argue.

--

He knew he was close when every scent disappeared. Edward didn't know much about the Volturi, but he did know that they would be able to do this. They were capable of erasing every scent in the vicinity. _They sure take the whole "not existing" thing fairly seriously,_ thought Edward dryly.

Edward slowed himself down, though his mind leapt ahead, whirling around ideas, plans. But really, he had no idea what to expect. His heart wanted to just walk into the place, pick up Bella, and be out, kicking as many asses in between. Especially Nathaniel's.

Realistically, he knew that wasn't an option. The Volturi would bring him down before he could even get to her.

Edward paused from the edge of a thicket. He had found the house, of that he was positive. Large and intimidating, it was the perfect dwelling for any Volturi member. Edward shuddered slightly.

Bella is in there.

They better not have touched a hair on her head. Edward's muscles tensed and he knew he could not wait a moment longer. Screw a plan. He would have to make it up as he went.

--

Bella found herself back in a glassed room. But this time, she knew she would be able to get out. With all the powers she had now, she was not afraid. In front of her, two figures stood facing her, their eyes daring her to touch them.

Bella glanced over at Aro, who stood with Jane outside the window.

"Go ahead, Bella. Do your thing," spoke Aro, his tone encouraging. Bella watched as Jane glanced at Aro, her eyes bright with excitement. Bella's stomach tightened slightly at their sick fascination.

Bella cleared her throat and glanced back at the two vampires in front of her. One poked the other in the side and laughed darkly.

"They said she was powerful...what is this?" he demanded, his eyes flashing to Bella.

"I don't know that I want to hurt you," replied Bella. "I don't even know you." Who was she to experiment on these vampires? For all she knew they had families and—

"I'll let you get to know me," said the same one, sneering at her and looking her up and down. Bella narrowed her eyes as he took a step forward, licking his bottom lip.

"Can you smell me?" she asked the other vampire, ignoring the first.

The second vampire, who held a much friendlier face looked at her in confusion.

"Of course," he replied.

Bella smiled.

She was definitely changed.

_Now let's see what I can do._

"And you smell bloody delicious," growled the first vampire, taking another step towards her.

Bella gathered her energy and focused it on the approaching figure. She then threw it at him, hoping to stop him dead, like Chase did.

Nothing.

Bella tried again.

The vampire took another step.

Confused, Bella threw out a wave of calm.

The vampire didn't stop.

Desperate, she focused on his mind, looking to read his thoughts.

Again, nothing.

Bella shook her head. Her powers were…gone?

From the other side of the glass Aro smiled victoriously.

"Nathaniel was bloody brilliant," he murmured to Jane.

Jane laughed gleefully.

"What's wrong, Isabella?" she called out. Bella's head snapped up, her confused gaze locking on Jane's face.

"I—" she broke off.

"It's the room, Bella. We had no idea it could really be done. But Nathaniel was right when he said that that room could put a stop to anyone's powers. I expected her powers to work on our guinea pigs though," mused Aro.

Bella felt her heart drop in her chest.

"But I tested my powers…" Bella trailed off. When she had entered the room, only an hour before, she has tested her powers to make sure she wasn't being lured into a trap.

She had been able to hear the thoughts of the two vampires already there.

"The door was open," answered Jane simply.

Bella shook her head, not wanting to believe her situation.

"Yes, this room is like any other room when the door is open. But as soon as the door closes, all powers cease to work. Brilliant," Aro sighed, glancing heavenward.

The vampire, the not-so-nice looking vampire, sneered at Bella and took another step towards her.

"Looks like it's time to get to know one another," he rasped.

"Don't touch me," said Bella, her teeth gritted together.

_How could I have let this happen? I was home free. How could I have been so stupid?_

"What? You mean…like this?" the vampire reached out a hand and caressed Bella's cheek. Bella flinched away and stepped back, surprised. She drew a hand to her cheek and looked at Aro, her eyes full of fire.

"You're going to let this happen?" she asked softly.

"You killed Nathaniel," he replied, his voice suddenly void of emotion.

"_You_ killed Nathaniel," she responded, but her eyes were on the looming vampire. Would she be able to fight him off? Or would her vampire strength fail her, too?

Bella took a breath and stepped forward.

--

Edward had never been one to be completely illogical.

And now, after he had attempted to enter the mansion with no plan at all, he remembered why.

It took five of Aro's vampires to pin him. It took three more to run and find a vampire with powers. And in that time, it took two more vampires to restrain Edward, who fought hard to free himself. Unsuccessfully.

And after that, with the arrival of Jane, it took only one to lead him down a long, dark corridor. Edward knew what she could do. He didn't have to test her. He also didn't care. He was closer to Bella. He could feel it.

"You smell that?" questioned Jane, her innocent voice lilting with the question.

Edward, distracted as he memorized the maze of hallways, answered vaguely.

" Smell what?"

"Take a deep breath, Cullen," she said, turning a smile on him quickly.

Edward allowed the air to rush into his lungs, pausing for any recognition.

It was freesia—Bella's human scent…mixed with something unfamiliar and—different.

"Bella!" he yelled, his eyes suddenly wide. He could smell her! But where was she? He turned swiftly, inhaling another mouthful, his eyes darting to an adjoining hallway, a hallway that held a stronger hint of Bella.

"Not so fast, Edward Cullen," smirked Jane. But Edward had already taken off. He ran wildly, guided only by the scent and the pure desperation of the situation.

He was being illogical again. But he didn't care. He needed to see her face. He needed to know she was okay.

_I can smell her! That could only mean one thing…_

_I said, not so fast._

Suddenly, Jane was in front of Edward, her eyes narrowing viciously as he attempted to look away in time. But he wasn't fast enough. He fell to the concrete floor, withering in the most excruciating pain, his body shaking with each endless wave.

It sounded so far away, and yet as Edward looked up, he realized the screams came from only a few feet away.

Bella. It was Bella screaming. The pain continued to shoot through every fiber in his body, but he suddenly wasn't sure if it was from what Jane was doing to him, or from what he saw before him.

Incased in a completely glass room, Bella was pinned to the furthest glass wall away from Edward, by a vampire four times her size. In his right hand, he held a knife…and his left hand was placed around Bella's neck.

Edward attempted to call her name, but nothing came out. He couldn't move, he couldn't talk. All he could do was allow the pain to pass through him silently. From a few feet away, Jane watched with a smile.

"Bella!" she called, "Your lover is here for a reunion!"

"Jane, you're such a romantic," smiled Aro moving forward, to watch Bella's reaction.

"Edward! No, what are you doing to him!" she screamed, her voice raspy from the large vampires hand around her throat. She felt the hand tighten ad heard him laugh.

But she had eyes only for Edward. He looked back at her from outside the glass room, his eyes glazed with a pain he did not voice.

"What are they…doing to you?" she whispered, emotion tingeing her whispered words.

Bella fought again against the vampire holding her. He responded by digging the knife into her cheek sadistically.

Bella cried out, a silent "No," forming on her lips, her eyes on Edward.

He closed his eyes and Bella screamed, throwing away the hand that clutched her throat. He couldn't, not after everything, he couldn't leave her now.

"Edward!" she screamed. His eyes flickered open again, hooded in so much pain.

"Bella," he mouthed the words now, and Bella read quickly, fighting absently against the hands that now restrained her around the waist.

"I love you," he reached a hand towards the glass, his fingertips pressing against the surface. Bella, desperate, yanked with everything she possessed and freed herself from the restraint of the large vampire.

She crossed the room to the wall, falling hard onto her stomach to press her hand to the glass, mirroring Edwards.

"Edward, stay with me!" she yelled, her eyes frantically on his. They closed heavily and then opened again, looking even less focused.

"Stop it, Jane!" she yelled, taking a second to look at the small girl.

"Aro! Make her stop! I will work for you! I will work for the Volturi, I will do as you wish!…just make her stop!"

Bella pulled her eyes back to Edward's face, which suddenly began to shake—but it wasn't from the pain.

"No, Bella. Don't promise them anything. Don't you sell yourself to…to them…this can't…this can't kill me," his voice was weak, but even its weakness, it exuded a certain confidence that Bella was sure she shouldn't doubt.

Bella stood up and glared at Aro, who looked back expectantly.

"Well, Isabella? Jane's ability may not be able to kill Edward. But why do you think that would matter? We have all sorts of methods.." he trailed off.

"Is that what you want from me? To be one of you?" she demanded, her eyes flashing.

"Yes," he responded calmly, his eyes only on her.

"If I agree to be part of your…cult," she spat out the word, "How do you know I won't betray you the first chance I get? How do you know I won't kill you all?"

"Bella. That's simple. If we die, the Cullen's die, Charlie and Renee die."

"And if I kill you all so fast that there is nobody to run and kill the Cullen's?"

"Not possible, and you'll have to trust me on that one," he answered.

"Trust," Bella laughed bitterly. "Make her stop," Bella ordered. Aro considered for a moment and then finally motioned for Jane to cease her torture. Jane pouted slightly but didn't protest.

Edward was on his feet in seconds.

"Bella," he plead, his hand still on the glass wall.

"Edward," she answered back, stepping closer to the glass, her hand pressed to the glass.

"Don't. There are other ways," he said, his eyes desperate.

"They will kill you," she responded, emotion thick in her voice.

Edward paused, knowing he would do the exact same thing for her. It was hard to argue the point, knowing how she felt exactly the same about him as he felt about her.

He opened his mouth and then closed it again.

"I know," murmured Bella, up against the glass now, both hands held up to his face. "There's no other way, Edward. But at least we'll both still be alive," she breathed.

"But not together," he responded, pressing his face against the glass were her hand was. She wished more than anything she could touch him.

One last time.

"They won't let us," responded Edward. Bella nodded, knowing he was hearing their thoughts. "They're terrified of you, Bella. I don't even know if they will let you out of this glass room. It's power-proof, I gather?"

Bella nodded, un-able to speak.

"Nathaniel is dead? But not before he changed you. And your powers…beyond anything Aro's ever seen," Edward nodded, his eyes showing relief.

"Time's up, lovebirds," sang Jane.

"No!" yelled Bella.

"We'll think of something," said Edward quietly. "I won't ever leave you, Bella,"

Bella banged against the glass as a troop of vampires suddenly appeared in the hallway behind Edward.

"I love you, Edward!" she whispered.

"I'm sorry," he replied.

"For what?" she questioned, pressing herself as close to his figure as she could with glass separating them.

"Everything," he answered.

The troop approached and grabbed Edward roughly.

"I love you, Bella. I will be back. I will get you out of here."

Bella watched the troop take him away. She sank slowly to the cold floor, her eyes staring at their retreating figures long after they had disappeared. She barely noticed that the other two vampires, the large scary one and the other, were no longer in the glass room.

She suddenly longed for the tears she could not cry.

Welcome to Hell.

* * *

**So...I suck. I haven't updated much too long and yet, you guys still read and recommend and review. Awesome. Just awesome. Thank you guys. I had a lot of RL drama to deal with and then finals this past week. **

**Also, I want to add that, because my story is set in an AU, my version of the Volturi may be a little out of character. I've had a few comments aren't happy that I've written Aro and the rest as treating Bella so sadistically... Yes, the Volturi exists to make sure our beloved vamps are never exposed, but I believe that Aro is also extremely power-hungry. And he would do anything to have that power and control it. Also, could his threats be empty? Hummmmmm...**

**Happy holidays to all of you who celebrate/recoginze and...happy Friday to everyone else!**

**Please continue to love me by reviewing, whether you hate the chapter or love it :D**


	25. Chapter 24 Colors of the Dusk

**Chapter Twenty-Four Colors of the Dusk**

* * *

Every muscle burned. Every inhalation screamed to be let back out. Every fiber in his body shrieked at him to stop. But he wouldn't. Because he simply couldn't.

Hunting was the only thing that kept his mind from Bella. The only thing that allowed him a few stolen moments away from the haunted memories, from the pointless conversations of his family, and away from his pure and total failure; his hatred for his own weakness.

_Three months._

The two- worded realization hit him like a ton of boulders and stopped his sprint just as quickly.

Three months, to the day, had been the last time he had seen Bella.

The image of her face in their last seconds together would haunt him for an eternity. The fear, the desperation, the dread. Her eyes conveyed everything Edward had also felt. He hoped he'd been able to do a better job of hiding it. He hoped all she saw from him was love. Love and hope.

_Hope_. Edward scoffed at the word that so many clung to—he, too, had been one of them. But now, three months later and still absolutely without _hope_, not even a glimmer, of saving Bella. He was no longer a believer.

Early on there had been hope. The first attempt was made by Carlisle, only days after Edward's escape. He thought that if he talked to Aro, as old friends, he could talk some sense into him--could make a deal, could figure something out. And so Carlisle went alone, his hopes when one day turned into two and two days turned to three, Emmett and Jasper had to physically hold Edward back . They were all worried, but Alice saw Carlisle coming back safely.

She just couldn't see if Bella followed.

On the third day, Esme and her children ran to the woods as Carlisle broke through from the thickness of trees. Edward's heart had plummeted when he saw Carlisle's expression and slumped shoulders. Defeat. Anguish. Betrayal and sadness.

He told his story quickly, sadly.

Aro had agreed to meet with him. They had exchanged pleasantries, asked after old friends. But when Carlisle cut to the chase and asked where Bella was, Aro turned cold. He claimed that Bella belonged to the Volturi now. That she was one of them. That she had chosen to be one of them. If Carlisle didn't believe him, Aro said, he could see for himself.

Carlisle followed Aro down a tunnel of dark hallways. When they stopped, what he saw before him shocked him.

Carlisle had paused in his story at this point, his eyes fixed on Edward.

Edward saw the images before the words could meet Dr. Cullen's lips.

Bella: feeding savagely on a screaming human, snarls ripping from her chest, her hands and face bloody.

Edward shook with rage and fear. He couldn't listen to the rest of Carlisle's story. He knew. Of course, the good doctor had failed.

Edward knew it was up to him. But this time, he had to have a plan.

A month after Carlisle's failed attempt, Edward managed to acquire help from an eager Emmett and slightly reluctant Jasper. And soon after that, he also managed to recruit Jacob and a few of the less "opinionated" wolves. With the wolves as an outside distraction, Edward, Emmett and Jasper snuck into the Volturi's temporary home and into the underground tunnels below, knowing the Volturi would never guess the two different species had teamed up. Edward, having had been to the glass room once before, directed Jasper, in the lead, through the maze of tunnels. Jasper had thrown out waves of a calming tiredness that had seemed to work well on the few oncoming threats. When they had come upon a guard, he was slow, sluggish to react. Emmett was able to pummel him and throw aside the body before anyone was alerted.

When they reached the glass room and saw the surrounding area was empty of guards, Edward had grinned triumphantly, his eyes eagerly searching for Bella within the walls of glass.

But she wasn't there.

And if she wasn't there, that could only mean one of two things.

She had managed to escape.

Or something much, much worse was happening.

Confused and suddenly feeling very defenseless, Edward had not put up a fight when Emmett had grabbed his arm and dragged him away from the room, back through the maze of corridors.

"We can't, we have to find her!" he had argued, as Emmett pushed him on ahead.

"She wasn't there, Edward. We've got to get out of here before they figure out we're here. If we stand any chance of getting back in later, we can't get caught. We need a new plan and now is not the time," Jasper had whispered, his voice firm and full of authority.

Edward had not argued.

But when they were safely back in the woods, he found himself starting to crumble.

"We could have found her, we could have…she's in there and we left her!" he shouted, pulling his arm from Emmett and turning to face the direction of the house.

"No. Edward, we would have been dead in there," Jasper had insisted, "Without a plan, we would not have made it out."

Edward knew Jasper was right.

But he was so confused. Where had she been that day? Why wasn't she in the glass room? Were there other glass rooms now? Had she escaped?

Or…and Edward shuddered to even think this, had Bella's nightmares become a reality? Was she willingly helping the Volturi? Was there no need for a protective room anymore?

Edward pulled himself back from his thoughts, realizing he'd stopped in the middle of a very familiar meadow. Bella's meadow.

He sank slowly to his knees, turning his head to the dark sky above, looking for answers in a place he knew would only carry infinitely more questions.

------

Bella's eyes shone fiercely under the moon-lit sky. She inhaled fully, knowing she did not need the air. And yet, it had never felt so good mimic a human motion. Not after being caged for so long.

_I am free._

Bella glanced at the house behind her. It had been her cage for so long…so long she had lost count of the passing days into night. She had never been able to actually see the sun or moon, but she could _smell_ them. She knew when she was missing a beautiful sunrise. And never would a sunset pass her without a twinge of sadness. The end of yet another day without Edward.

And how many had she missed? Bella pondered this, watching the quickly moving clouds as they built up angrily in front of the moon and across the sky.

She couldn't even guess.

As she turned back to the forest in front of her, she smiled, anticipation suddenly spurning her on, despite the rumblings of thunder in the distance. Not even a full-fledge storm could ruin her mood.

She was so close. So close to the rest of her life—the rest of her eternity with Edward.

And the best part? Never again would she have to fear the Volturi. Bella's smile disappeared as she glanced one more time behind her.

Days, weeks, months (she assumed) of planning had finally paid off. It had not been an easy road. She had done some things that she was not proud of. She had done things she only wanted to forget.

_(flash)_

_Blood dripped from her mouth. She swiped at her lips carelessly, her eyes focused sharply on the human in front of her. The human—a woman-- cried and screamed, one hand over her face, the other on her neck._

"_I will not kill you," Bella spoke softly her lips remaining motionless._

"_Monster!" screamed the woman, from under her arm. "Monster!"_

_Bella nodded slightly, barely realizing that she was validating the woman's words. It had taken all her will, all the energy she possessed not to kill the human Aro had thrown in the glass room a day before. Sadistically, he had purposely not given her anything but human food to eat, knowing of course, that as a full vampire now, human food would hold no interest to Bella's growing appetite and growling stomach._

_Twenty-four hours into resisting the woman's blood, Bella realized two things. First, she was hungry. No, she was starving. If she didn't eat, she would become weak. If she became weak, she would lose. And if she lost, she would never see Edward again. That alone would have been enough, but there was also her second realization. She already knew she had to drink some of this woman's blood to survive, to see Edward again. But she could also use her actions to her advantage. What if she showed a little savagery? What if she drank this woman's blood looking as careless and as savage as she could? She could go forth with her plan. She could make Aro think she was becoming one of them._

_And so, she had._

It had scared her, the ease of which it took to spill the innocent woman's blood. And how much she enjoyed the taste. How hard it had been to stop the drinking. And how she almost hadn't stopped.

Bella shuddered slightly at the memory. She had almost killed that woman. But it had put her plans into motion. Aro had been satisfied. He had not expected her to feed from the woman. She realized, feeling slightly bitter, that Aro had expected her to fight him in the opposite way she had chosen to fight.

He had thought she would refuse to be one of them.

Bella laughed bitterly, running a hand through her tangled mass of hair and glancing around the trees, uncertain which way to run.

The joke had been on Aro and his family. Ultimately, she had won, so many of their eternities cut short.

_But not Aro's._

Bella tried not to worry. He wouldn't bother her ever again. Not when she saw the amazement and wonder wiped clean away, replaced with a horror Aro had never known. Bella felt a flicker of hatred, suddenly longing for a match. But would setting fire to the house really offer her closure?

She decided it didn't matter.

Never again would she have to look over her shoulder. Bella turned her head forward, took another deep breath and surged ahead, memories of the countless painful sunsets evaporating as she prepared herself to see Edward at last.

-------

Alice chewed noiselessly on the cap of a blue pen, her mind a million miles away from the task she was currently engaged in. Close by, Esme flipped through a decorating magazine quickly, threw it to the coffee table and picked up the next in a stack of about fifty.

"We should get out there soon if we want to play. The storm's about to start," called Rosalie from upstairs, appearing a second later in a loose t-shirt and form-fitting jeans. At the same time a bolt of lightning cracked nearby. Alice didn't look up. Roaslie shot Esme a questioning look. Esme frowned back, an eye-brow raised.

"Alice?" asked Esme softly.

Alice looked up, her face blank. Her eyes vacantly stared into nothingness.

"Alice! Baseball? Are you coming? The boys are already out in the field," Rosalie repeated.

Instead of answering, Alice's eyes rolled to the side, un-blinking.

Instantly, Esme was at her side.

Alice was having a vision.

Roaslie ad Esme watched, transfixed, on the blankness of Alice's face. And then she started to shake.

Rosalie jumped forward and grabbed Alice by the arms.

"Alice!" she called, an unusually high pitch escaping from her perfect lips, betraying her calm exterior.

And then suddenly, Alice was back. She sprung to her feet, nearly knocking a relieved Esme over in the process.

"Edward!" she yelled.

"He's not close enough, he can't hear you; he's playing ball. What is it, Alice? What did you see?" Esme asked breathlessly.

"I've got to tell him…" Alice ripped through the room and tore open the door, the other two female vampires following closely behind.

"Tell him what?" demanded Rosalie, exasperated, catching up to Alice.

"Aro! The Volturi…I saw them, defeated. Someone, some_thing_…has destroyed the family!"

"Bella?" Rosalie questioned, awe mingled reluctantly in with her question.

"Has to be," responded Esme, a smile completely lighting up her face.

"Yes," whispered Alice, flying around the trees. "Has to be."

--

_Crack!_

The baseball connected solidly with his bat and took off above the trees at the exact same moment lighting struck in the distance. Edward grinned as he quickly rounded the bases, sliding easily into home. Emmett was still out of sight in search of the ball.

"Nice one, Edward!" yelled Carlisle from the pitcher's mound.

Jasper reluctantly grumbled his praise.

"But just wait 'till the girls get here. Don't get used to it," Jasper said from his crouch at home plate. Edward grinned again, feeling more normal than he had in months. He hadn't been happy at the time, but he was now glad that Emmett and Jasper had tricked him into coming out.

_Though I should have been suspicious the moment I heard Emmett reciting that beer commercial over and over in his head._

When Emmett finally came loping back into sight, they traded sides, Carlisle throwing the baseball to Emmett and Edward taking position in the outfield, as Jasper grabbed the bat. Edward stood still, his eyes on Emmett. Not for the first time since they'd started playing, Edward had to push his feeling of guilt to the back of his mind.

"Just give us tonight, Edward. You can go back to living in Hell tomorrow," Emmett had spoken, trying to keep Edward from storming home. The look on their faces had finally won Edward over. They were worried about him. They wanted to help. This was their way of helping him.

And Edward owed it to them. He'd been miserable to be around for the past three months. He would have to make more of an effort. Especially when he revealed his latest plan to get Bella home.--he was going to need all the friends he could get.

"Get ready to run for days," yelled Jasper from home plate, practice swinging a couple times before looking Emmett in the eye and nodding.

The thunder make its presence known and Emmett tensed himself, waiting for the lightning he knew would follow seconds later.

"Wait!" yelled Edward from the back of the field, realizing suddenly that he wasn't hearing any of their thoughts in his head. But Emmett had already released the ball from his fingertips one second before Jasper connected with the ball.

_Crack!_

Lightning flashed as Jasper dropped the bat and ran. Emmett had turned to look at Edward, but Edward merely shrugged, his focus shifting to the ball whizzing over his head. He took off.

Just as he broke into the woods, he heard Alice yelling his name.

Edward kept running, his eye on the ball. He was going to catch this ball; it suddenly seemed like the most important thing.

It had been a good hit; one of Jasper's better connections. Edward swore under his breath as he lost sight of the ball. It had dipped beneath the tree-line, yards in front of him.

Edward sighed and slowed, not wanting to miss it. As he broke through a thicket of trees he had to pause and laugh at himself sadly.

Not five feet away from him, stood Bella. Bella holding the baseball. Bella holding the baseball looking…shocked.

Edward laughed again.

Of course, it was all in his head. Perhaps he was going insane, conjuring Bella up out of thin air like that. Maybe he'd have to talk to Carlisle about how to deal with this kind of crazy. Do crazy pills work on vampires? Wikipedia would know.

The imaginary Bella dropped her mouth open and just stared at him.

Edward shook his head, blinking a couple times.

"Mighty fine job you've done, Edward. This is the most realistic Bella yet," he muttered, his eyes on the beauty in front of him.

Something inside him twisted painfully. She was so life-like, so real.

God, it hurt.

Would it ever stop?

"Edward?" it…what the hell…? it _whispered_. Edward blinked again. Never before had his imaginary Bella's whispered. Or even spoken. What had Carlisle said about vampires and Xanax?

"I-I caught this," she continued, her eyes full of disbelief and reluctance. And…fear?

Edward frowned.

"Why would I imagine you saying that? And why would you look so…scared?"

He watched as the figure's face completely changed.

"You think I'm--" a strangled laugh escaped her dry lips—"Edward, it's me, I—I did something back there. The Volturi…"she trailed off, waving her hand behind her.

And then Edward un-froze. His face crumbled. If he could cry, his face would have been soaked with tears.

"Bella? Oh God, Bella. It's really you," he paused. Took a breath. Shook. Stared at her. She didn't disappear. She was real.

One step, two, three steps. He was staggering and he knew it. He could barely see straight and it was affecting his walking.

"Edward, no, wait!" Bella lurched backwards, thrusting her arms out straight and holding them out, as if to stop him.

Edward froze again.

Something was wrong. Something was different.

Edward's entire body yearned to touch her. Magnetized, he could barely hold himself those couple of steps back.

"Bella?" he choked.

"Edward. I don't know—I don't know if I can touch you. Without killing you," she whispered, her voice cracking. Grief flooded her face, as though the thought of never touching Edward again would completely ruin her.

"I may have—inherited Nathaniel's power," she continued, her arms still stretched out, palms towards Edward. Edward focused on her hand, wanted so badly to just grab it and pull her to him.

"I'm willing to take the risk," responded Edward. Because right now, he didn't care that about anything other than touching Bella. Holding her, breathing her in. And never letting go. He never wanted to make that mistake again.

"No! We don't know yet. But Carlisle, he can test me, we can find out…"

Edward grabbed her hand. Pulled. She flew into his arms easily. Too easily. She wasn't strong, she couldn't fight.

He enveloped her in his arms, scooping her to his muscled chest and hugging her _hard._

Bella's breath stopped for a moment as she gasped, expecting the worst. Edward cringed, just a little, waiting for a pain. Waiting for a sign telling him he'd acted stupidly and carelessly.

And then…nothing.

Nothing.

Bella let her breath out in a giant whoosh. Laughter bubbled in her chest and escaped from her mouth unchecked, the sound reverberating off a near-by boulder.

Edward laughed, too, and held Bella even closer. When he could gain some control, he buried his face in her hair and breathed.

"I can smell you again," he spoke, pulling her only far enough away to look down into her dark eyes. Bella closed her eyes and brought her face into Edward's strong chest and pulled herself against him.

"It's you," she whispered.

"It's us," he replied, his hands running along her body, up and down her arms, into her hair and to her face.

He never wanted to stop touching her.

"I thought…I wasn't sure…," she began.

"I know. I tried to-- but you weren't there," Edward replied. But words, full-sentences, escaped him at the moment. And yet one questioned wormed its way past his subconscious.

"But how…?"

"I killed some of them," but she said it with sadness, with regret. She was a better vampire than any he knew. Most would be rejoicing the death of those that had hurt them.

"You had to. Aro?" he asked gently.

"Alive," she replied. "But gone."

"You have a story," he murmured into her hair.

"I also have you."

"Bella," he whispered, raw emotion unsteadying his voice.

"Edward," she responded, tilting her head upwards. Edward lowered his head as she stood on her tip-toes, wrapping her arms around his neck. Lips inches apart, Bella spoke softly.

"I couldn't dream of this, of you, after Nathaniel turned me. It was worse than the starving, worse than the tests…almost worse than the killing. Before when I spelt, I slept only to dream of you. And then suddenly, they took that away from me and it was torture. I started to forget what you tasted like, the softness of your skin and the smell of you. That was the worst. Instead, every time I could smell the sun setting, I thought of you. I conjured up your image and held on as long as I could."

Edward pulled back slightly, his lips parting, ready to answer. Bella smiled softly and put a finger to his lips.

"You've saved me three times now, Edward. You saved me when I was human. When I didn't even know I needed saving. You showed me how sad and hollow my life was before you. I hadn't been unhappy before you, but I also didn't realize that I lived my life in black and white. And then you entered my life and suddenly, I was viewing the world in color. Brilliant, broad strokes of every color imaginable. When you left, the color dimmed. I never went back to black and white, not ever. But those colors dimmed and I knew nothing could bring them back but you. And then you did come back. You saved me again when I had lost hope. A hybrid, doomed to go crazy, you made me believe I would survive it…that there was hope. Despite the circumstances, my colors came back with a vengeance. You'd saved me again. The third time was probably the hardest. I didn't know if I would make it out of there, Edward, I didn't. I had a plan…but how many years would it take to implement? How many years would it take to gain the trust? And would the right opportunity present itself? I didn't know. And I knew, without a doubt, it would be near impossible for you to break through the Volturi's security. I was pretty sure it could only mean death for you. So even though, it was up to me, it was you that made it happen.

"And that's when you saved me again, Edward. My colors never once dimmed back there, because I held onto you and the image of us...and the love. It saved me from black and white. It saved me from a worse insanity than being hybrid. And, ultimately, you brought me back here. I will never be able to show you exactly the depths of my gratitude, Edward, but I will spend my forever…our forever, I hope, trying."

Bella pulled her finger from Edward's lips, setting her arm back behind his neck and pulling him closer.

"And that was the longest prelude to a kiss ever," she finished, looking into Edward's eyes. He shook his head slightly, his eyes tender.

Bella closed her eyes as his lips brushed hers softly. And then again, slightly more firmly. Bella found herself sighing into the kiss as her urgency arose. She pressed her body closer and lost herself in the kiss.

Seconds turned into minutes and the kisses continued, tenderness turning into urgency. The urgency fuelled by passion, time apart and complete and utter adoration.

And then, as though she knew her timing couldn't have been better, Alice's voice rang through the trees, close.

They both had to pull back, though not from their embrace, laughing as they panted.

"Well, at least we'll always _look_ like horny teenagers. Even when we're two-hundred years old," smiled Bella.

"That's not all that far away for me, Bella. You sure the age difference won't bother you?" smiled Edward back, brushing a lock of her hair back from her face.

"I've always preferred the mature-type," she touched his face as Alice broke through the trees and began screeching when she caught sight of the two.

"Bella! I knew it! Jasper! Over here!"

Alice ran to the pair, her sparkling eyes on Bella's face as she took them in quickly.

Bella was suddenly pulled into an intensely energetic Alice hug, which attempted to wrap itself around both she and Edward.

"I _missed_ you," Alice's muffled voice declared.

"I missed you, too, Alice. So much," and as the rest of the Cullen's found their way to the clearing, Bella realized just how much she meant that.

They really were her family now. And she was fairly certain, she was finally entitled to a happily ever after.

"But how did you…? I saw the carnage! That was you by yourself?"

"Let her be, Alice," said Esme softly, coming up behind Alice and hugging Bella tightly.

"Fine. For now. But I expect the full story, Bella. And it had better involve drama, intrigue and costume changes!"

"I may even be able to throw in some romance for you," grinned Bella, her eyes on Edward's face.

She was sure, even with the horrific story she had to tell looming ahead of her; she would be capable of delivering it without a shake.

* * *

**Wow. So, finally, there was the reunion chapter. I hope it was worth the wait. I had to write and re-write this a few times until I was happy with it. Now, all that is left is the very last chapter were Bella will tell her story, ends will be tied, and E and B will have some moments. Sigh. I love them. I'm going to miss this story. But, I'm also ready for my next. This has been my first fanfic...and it was been an intense growing experience, man I have learned so much...I can't wait to test things out on a new story! Thank you guys for remaining loyal (and continuing to flood me with PM's about "when are you going to update?" :D)**

**The last chapter will be up relatively soon as well. But I would love to hear early how you've felt about the story and about anything else you wanna let me know :)**


	26. Chapter 25 This Magic

**A/N (July 9****th****, 2009): Though this story has been complete for some time now, I just wanted to add in this note to say thank you to all you awesome people who have been adding Sleeping to Dream onto your favourite lists and continue to send me reviews and comments. I love that just because this story is finished, doesn't mean people stop reading it (which I think I thought would happen!)**

**I also wanted to mention that Sleeping to Dream has been nominated for an Indie Twilight Fiction Award! I'm so flattered and happy and surprised and I would be even MORE of all those things if you guys deem this story worthy of actually heading over and voting for it. It's nominated for Best Alternate Universe Complete and please, I would be so happy if you guys would go over and support this story. I believe voting starts sometime today, so go check out www. theindietwificawards (dot) com. Additionally, there are so many other amazing and underappreciated stories over there, check 'em out and support the indies!**

And so this is it. The final chapter of Sleeping to Dream, which also managed to be the longest of my story. Without further ado...here it is. Enjoy :)

**Chapter Twenty-Five This Magic**

" The glass room where they kept me in the beginning was apparently a genius idea had by Nathaniel. The Volturi's enemy base was getting larger, but also, more powerful. When the room was built, I had not yet been changed into a hybrid. The room had never been meant for me.

"But, by whatever coincidence, they never got a chance to try it out on anyone like me. Not before my arrival. Aro wasn't even sure it would work. But then, there I was. I had just killed Nathaniel and none of his most powerful vampires could harm me. It was his last ditch effort to keep me as his own—and to take a chance on the un-tested room. Aro may have tricked me into that glass room but I tricked my way out. I was locked it there for days without any food. Of course, to tease me, Aro would throw in human food--which, as you all know, takes like crap. Even to me, no longer a hybrid. Eventually, when I was weak and could barely move, Aro put in a human, a woman. I resisted her for about a day. And then, I caved. I knew I had to eat. But I also realized I could use this to my advantage. So instead of showing my defeat, I showed Aro what I knew would shock him. I showed him what I knew he wanted me to be. When you must have seen me, Carlisle, I was ripping into the woman. I was eating, yes. I was so hungry and her blood--it tasted so good. I almost couldn't stop-" Bella gulped some air quickly, remembering the feeling of almost losing control.

"But you didn't," added Edward quietly, squeezing her hand.

"We've all been there, Bella," Jasper spoke from his seat beside Alice on the white couch across from its double—the couch she and Edward shared. Bella smiled weakly.

"As a newborn, Bella, I'm shocked you were able to stop," put in Carlisle from his seat beside Esme on a nearby love-seat. Close by, Emmett sat on the floor in front of Rosalie, who perched on an elegant chaise lounge.

"I was shocked too. I mean, I was putting on a show. I knew Aro would be somewhere, watching each of my actions carefully and I wanted to look out of control and savage. That's kind of what I was going for. But I didn't ever think it would be that easy. I knew I'd need more control the next time. Also, I had no idea Carlisle saw any of that—I was so wrapped up in my hunger. Maybe things would have been different, had I seen you. Maybe they wouldn't have. I don't know," Bella paused for a moment, looking at Carlisle sadly. Could lives have been spared had she seen Carlisle that day?

Carlisle smiled back, his eyes encouraging.

"How much longer did they keep you in the glass room?" he asked.

"A few weeks, I think. The day Edward , Jasper and Emmett came to get me, I must have already fully convinced Aro I was the savage animal who had completely forgotten Bella Swan. The day they let me out of the glass room was a day that required great control from me. I realized I couldn't just step out and zap them all—because I still really had no idea what I could do. Or even really, how to do it. I realized I could wind up back in that room very quickly, if I wasn't careful. So I waited. And then, Aro finally decided it was time to test me. He put me in the round room with some of his guinea pigs. At first, I couldn't do anything. I couldn't get my powers to work. Aro was angry—he was wondering if this had all been for nothing. He was also worried...I learned later, through his thoughts, that they had something serious to deal with. An entire colony of newborns they wanted to take out. These newborns, headed by a bunch of Aro's old rivals, were looking to overthrow the Volturi. They wanted to change the rules, they thought that humans should know about vampires—and fear them rightly and they were sick of answering to the Volturi. Aro had been planning on having me to take them all out. He thought I was capable of that. But, as he tested me, I was proving to be quite a disappointment.

"Or so I was leading him to believe. But, usually after I could smell the sun-rising, Aro would leave me alone for a few hours, usually not bothering to transport me back to the glass room. He was past thinking I could possibly be a threat to him. But as I sat alone in the dark, I practiced. I could read their thoughts, anyone passing by the round room. I could hear them. And after a few more days, I figured out how to manipulate emotions. When I had that mastered, I was able to have a guard come check on me. I needed him to practice on—I needed to know what I was capable of, without alerting Aro. Turns out, I can do quite a bit," Bella allowed herself a small smile.

"Carlisle, you saw how, as a hybrid, I seemed to acquire Jasper's powers, and Edward's. Well, it seems that I can acquire any power that is used on me. I realized this had to be true when I attempted to use Jane's power on that guard. Just like I witnessed when Jane used her power on Edward, the guard withered on the floor in agony. I also learned how to control my powers. There was a reason my powers hadn't been working when I had been trying to use them on Aro's demand—I was frightened and unfocussed. As I experimented in secret, I realized that the more I focused on—" Bella hesitated slightly, glancing quickly at Edward, "—on the people I wanted to protect, the easier it was to use my powers. And so, I started to think of you guys, and of Charlie, Renee and Jacob. It become easier the more I practiced. I had a lot to figure out, though. Many of Aro's vampires had used their powers on me…which meant that I possessed powers that I wasn't even aware of. It proved dangerous. "

"Extremely," nodded Carlisle, his eyes dark.

"When one of the guards accidently touched me as he led me back to the glass room one day, I saw everything he had ever thought. I realized quickly, I had inherited Aro's gift," Bella paused a moment as she watched Emmett's eyes widen.

"That means….when we all hugged you—"

Bella nodded solemnly.

"I know all your dirty secrets, Emmett," she replied. She could feel, rather than see everyone is the room tense up, probably wishing they had been warned before they had hugged for hours earlier. Edward's surprise was the strongest, a look of confusion in his eyes.

Bella grinned.

"I had to learn how to control everything, too. Or I may have gone crazy, with so much swirling around in my head. You're all safe. Yes, I touched you all, but I've learned to "see" only when I allow myself."

"Remarkable. The control!" muttered Carlisle.

"Can you do this with all your powers?" asked Alice eagerly. "Like with Edwards? Can you turn off everyone's thoughts?"

Bella nodded.

"I can. That one takes more conscious effort to control, as it's something that is going on all the time," Bella glanced at Edward, looking almost apologetic. Edward laughed lightly and brought her hand to his lips, kissing her palm gently.

"Don't look at me like that. Maybe you can teach me something new, although I _do_ plan on being next to you for a very, very long time. So I think I will have a new world of silence to get used to," he smiled.

"Bella? What did you do with that guard? The one you had used Jane's power on?" asked Rosalie, speaking for the first time, her lips pursed thoughtfully.

Bella shifted uncomfortably.

" I—I ended up killing him," she replied softly.

"You had to," spoke Edward vehemently. "Don't feel bad for what you had to do, Bella. These vampires had no regard for what happened to _you_."

"I didn't kill him right away. In fact, I didn't ever want to kill him. At first, after I had used Jane's power on him, I knew I couldn't let him go, obviously. Aro couldn't yet know that I could use my powers. So I used Chase's power. Remember that Chase can freeze limbs? Cause immobility? The guard couldn't leave, couldn't run away. But I knew that would only do for so long before Aro came back. So I experimented on him. I realized he might be the only chance I got to practice before I had to just…attack. It was on that guard that I realized I could kill without touching. I didn't mean to—I didn't know what was happening. I just, he was making all this noise and I'd been focusing on silencing him when suddenly, he flew across the room, hit the opposite wall _hard_ and basically…for lack of a better description…blew up. There was some fire and some smoke and he was gone. Nothing left. It was like he'd never existed."

"Holy shit," exclaimed Emmett, looking around for someone to high-five. "I hope you learned to control _that_ one?"

"I figured out the trigger. Just don't piss me off, Emmett, and you'll be fine," Bella warned.

Emmett sat down slowly, his hands held forward, caution written playfully on his face.

"I wasn't sure when I was going to make my move. But when I heard in Aro's thoughts, just a few days later, I saw that he was getting impatient with me, I knew my plan would have to start soon. He was wondering if there was even a point anymore. He was ready to go back to Italy and was satisfied with having me taken out by the Volturi guard. And so…my day came. I wasn't exactly ready, but I was willing to give it everything."

--

"_Isabella, this is just useless. Do you realize what I've put on the line to be here? To test you and train you? But this is getting ridiculous! Where are those powers?" Aro spoke in frustration, as he circled Bella, his fingers on his temples. Bella just stood there, in the middle of the circular room, her shoulders slumped forward in mock discomfort._

"_Maybe the glass room sucked them out of me," she suggested, her voice low but sarcastic._

_Aro stopped and lifted his head, his ancient eyes on the girl in front of him._

_Bella took a breath and stared right back, listening without expression to the thoughts flowing through Aro's head. They were of disappoint and defeat._

"_Aro, what exactly would I gain you, had I been able to perform? You have Jane and the others with their powers. Together, the Volturi is more powerful than anything. Than anyone. Me included," Bella spoke._

"_That's certainly the truth right I had seen so much in you, Isabella. Nathaniel was positive you held the key to the future of vampires, of the Volturi."_

" _The future how? I mean, what's wrong with the Volturi as it stands? Why would you need someone like me?"_

_Bella voiced the question, and though she knew Aro's answer would never contain the entire truth, she saw what Aro wanted in his mind. The greed, the power, the control._

_He wanted to be feared by all. He wanted to use her as his own personal weapon, as the ultimate arsenal. He saw a war of worlds…he saw the vampires defeat all werewolves—he saw the disappearance of any immortal enemy. And he saw himself as the leader, victor and eventual ruler of all this. With Bella at his side-- his personal defender, his weapon. The key to his success._

_And she saw the eventual revelation of vampires to the humans. She saw them in Aro's mind as slaves, as cows to the slaughter house._

_Bella flinched at the images._

"_You will never have that," she spat bitterly, her anger rising. A second too late, she realized she had perhaps given herself away._

_Aro's eyes widened slightly._

"_Never have what?" he repeated carefully._

_Bella shifted her eyes away quickly, checking her anger._

"_Isabella Swan? Is there something you're not- -"_

_Bella felt herself tense. And then, everything happened at once._

_As Aro finished his sentence, ten members of the Volturi guard rushed in, Jane in the lead. Her eyes shifted quickly from Bella to Aro._

"_Jane, what is the meaning of this? Can you not see I am rather occupied?" Aro spoke, his eyes still only on Bella. Bella had to focus sharply, as suddenly her senses were assaulted with ten other minds. But she could still hear Aro's the loudest._

_And he was suspicious of her._

"_Aro. Daniel is missing. He has been missing for days. No one has seen him since he moved _her _a few days ago," Jane paused, sneering at Bella with hostility._

_Bella heard Aro's thoughts become crisper in their conviction. He straightened up, took a step forward._

"_Isabella?" Bella stepped back, frightened._

_It wasn't supposed to happen like this. Not eleven against one. _

What if I can't do this?

"_Isabella? Where is Daniel?"_

_Bella watched, feeling completely helpless, as Aro signaled for his guards to come forward. Jane grinned, her face full of a sinister pleasure. Bella heard her thoughts loudly. She couldn't wait to figure out a way to hurt Bella, to kill her. And later, to deliver the news to the Cullen's personally. Watch in satisfaction as Edward crumbled._

_Bella's head snapped up at that last thought from Jane. She straightened her back and flipped back her hair. A smile played across her lips._

"_Daniel? Ohhh, Daniel! Would that have been the guard I killed?" she spoke to Aro, but her eyes never left Jane's face. And then, she acted quickly._

_Aro had to be first. He would be the key player in all of this. She thrust out a hand, focusing intently on Aro. His limbs froze completely, causing him to fall helplessly to the marble floor below. Quickly turning to position herself in front of his body, Bella turned her eyes to the already attacking guards._

"_I wouldn't get too close," warned Bella, hoping her shield would work. She hadn't tried it since that day in Portland, so long ago it seemed, when Carlisle was testing her._

_But she was able to smile in satisfaction when the two lead guards suddenly stopped, as though struck by an invisible wall._

"_What the hell?" yelled one, reaching a hand out, suddenly cautious. The other stepped a few paces to the left and tried again, to no avail. The shield was working…and it was strong._

_But it was also taking much of her focus and she knew she wouldn't be able to maintain the wall and keep Aro immobile._

"_You're not going to be able to keep that up for long," sneered Jane, as the other guard members approached the wall._

"_You're right. I should probably just kill Aro now and deal with the rest of you," she spoke, turning slightly. Aro looked at her silently, his eyes full of certain sickening awe._

"_Ha! Do you know what it even takes to kill a vampire?" she was stalling and Bella knew it._

"_Sure. I killed Nathaniel, didn't I?"_

"_Nathaniel killed himself. He was stupid."_

_Bella pulled back her wall. She knew she had to do it, but she cringed anyways as she chose the closest two guards and focused._

_This time, there was no flying and hitting of wall. Just flame and smoke and then poof!--they were gone, as though they'd never existed._

_A silence filled the room._

"_My God," Bella heard Aro from behind her, but she didn't turn._

"_Anyone else?" she demanded._

"_Go! Kill her!" yelled Jane, her tone beyond hysterical. Four more guards rushed forward, their faces masks of determination and years of unquestioned obedience. _

_Bella closed her eyes briefly and then opened then, throwing forth the energy she had collected within. Three of the guards were thrown past Jane and up against the wall before flames shot out and they disappeared into smoke. The fourth guard apparently changed his mind half-way through and had turned back to Jane, missing Bella's burst of energy. Bella thrust her left hand forward, using her energy to stop the guard. She froze his limbs, and, like Aro minutes before, fell to the marble, rendered useless._

_Jane and her three remaining guards started at her, every mouth agape._

"_Hey Jane?" Bella asked, lowering her hands._

_Jane scowled, pulling her lips together and pressing them into each other. Hard._

"_I will find you. I will hunt you down and hurt you," announced Jane, her hands turning into small fists on her hips. "if it's the last thing I do."_

_Bella laughed dryly._

"_Sorry Jane, but I've already planned out the last thing you're going to do. This is from Edward," and with that, Bella focused her power into her eyes as she gazed hard at Jane. Jane's eyes widened, as she realized what was about to happen to her._

_She screamed as she hit the floor, withering in a pain she had never known._

"_Now you understand what it feels like," said Bella quietly._

"_Let her go, Isabella," spoke Aro's voice._

"_Why?" demanded Bella, her eyes still on Jane, whose shrieking only grew louder._

"_Because you've proven your point," he responded weakly._

"_Have I? What exactly is my point, Aro?"_

"_That you hold more power than us. That we cannot keep you here."_

"_Yes. I am not one of you," she replied softly._

"_Oh, but how wrong you are, Isabella. Look at yourself. You are one of us. A natural, I would say."_

"_No. I'm doing this to save my life. To save the lives of the people I love. You have a choice, Aro. You let me go and never, ever search for me. Never try to get me back in the Volturi. Never again bother the Cullen's. Go back to Italy alive and never think of me again. If you don't, I will kill you. You saw what I can do. Make the right decision," Bella took her eyes off Jane and the shrieking immediately stopped._

"_You bitch!" yelled Jane, jumping to her feet._

_But Bella only had eyes for Aro now. She had done her little demonstration. He knew what she could do—what she was capable of._

"_Aro?"_

_He had attempted to hold a neutral face. To show her nothing. But of course, she saw it all through his thoughts. He wasn't simply scared of her—he was horrified by what she could do. He knew she was serious and he was ready to go back to Italy—for good._

"_That would be the right decision, Aro," smiled Bella, walking towards the door. As she passed Jane, the tiny girl went to lunge at her. With a flick of her hand, Bella sent out one final burst of energy. Jane flew at Aro, burst into flames and disappeared in a cloud of smoke right before his eyes._

_Aro growled reflexively in anger, his limbs suddenly released and flailing everywhere._

"_Unlike you, Aro, she would never have rested until she had hurt me severely. She was already plotting Edward's death."_

_And with that, Bella stepped out the door._

_She didn't look back._

_Not one guard bothered her as she wound her way through the mazes of the underground passages. Infact, she came across not one living (or dead) soul. Aro must have sent out the memo:_

_Don't fuck with Isabella Swan._

_---_

"…and the next thing I knew, I was standing in the middle of the woods with a baseball in my hands."

Bella finished her story quietly. She wasn't sure what the Cullen's were going to think of what she'd done and of who she had killed. She had told herself she was not going to look into their minds to find out. She would be patient. The room was completely silent and when she looked up, she looked at Edward first.

The look in her eyes must have spoken loudly, as Edward pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her body protectively, holding her face eye-level to his own.

"You have nothing, _nothing_ to be apologetic for, my love. You hear me? Aro deserved to die and yet you left him alive. And even though I can't hear anyone's thoughts while you're sitting next to me, I know we're all thinking it," Edward nodded towards the rest of his family.

"I can't believe you didn't use your crazy-ass powers on him, Bella," nodded Emmett, looking wistful as he karate chopped the air a couple of times.

"Seriously, Bella. Why didn't you?" asked Alice frowning slightly.

Bella chanced a look at Carlisle. After Edward, his opinion mattered most. Some of those vampires had been his friends.

"I am still…digesting your story, Bella. What you can do, it is beyond anything I have ever heard. To be able to kill a vampire with just a focusing thought. That is—well, it is unheard of," Carlisle mumbled. Esme smiled reassuringly from next to her husband.

"You did exactly what you had to do, Bella. If you are looking to us for forgiveness or acceptance, you need not. We will always, always stand behind you in your choices. I am just so happy you're home. Home safe. We were all so worried," she smile darkened slightly as she glanced at Edward.

Bella squeezed Edward's hand and smiled back at Esme.

"I didn't kill Aro because I knew how far back he and Carlisle go. And I had already killed so many. Too many. And Jane," Bella shuddered slightly at the thought of the creepy little girl with the ancient mind. "I had already delivered a blow to the Volturi, taking away Jane and Nathaniel…had I killed Aro, their leader, I don't know that the rest of the guard have would stopped until they figured out a way to kill me."

Bella watched Jasper nod thoughtfully.

"She's right. You're right, Bella. It may have taken years, centuries even…but they would have probably retaliated eventually."

"And now? You don't think they will?" asked Rosalie, her eyes flashing slightly.

"Not if what Bella said is accurate. It sounds like she scared the shit out of Aro. I don't see him messing with us. With Bella," responded Jasper.

Carlisle nodded in agreement.

"Aro likes the idea of power, but not power he can't control. With what Bella possesses, she could kill him at any second of any day and that would not sit well with him—she cannot be controlled. Aro will stay in Italy. And I will make the phone call to guarantee that," Carlisle said, his eyes on Bella.

Bella felt a huge sense of relief. She never should have doubted that they would all support her.

"I hope you won't be opposed to testing later on? We definitely need to be extremely carful and work on control. And also figure out if you can do anything else," Bella smiled at the excitement in the good doctor's voice. She nodded eagerly. She did not want any surprises. Or accidental injuries.

"Wait!" spoke Emmett suddenly, "You said you caught that baseball?" Bella nodded.

"It scared the crap out of me. Seemed to come from nowhere," she responded.

"Ha!We win! Bella caught your ball, Jasper! Pay up, my man!" Jasper groaned.

"I was kind of hoping Emmett wouldn't catch that part," he said, reaching into a pocket and pulling out a leather wallet.

The seriousness of the mood quickly evaporated as Bella burst out laughing with the rest of the Cullen's. Bella watched as Alice picked up the television remote control and threw it at Emmett's head.

Bella relaxed for the first time in many months.

They were her family. And as she looked around from face to face she knew she's found her spot in the world, right beside the people that loved her fiercely.

--

Bella could not get enough of Edward. She realized, as the first few days and nights flew by, that no matter where she was or who else she was with, she was always touching Edward. And he was always touching her back.

On her third night back, Bella and Edward wandered away from where the family had been hanging-out downstairs. Alone for the first time since their reunion in the woods, the pair--hand in hand--climbed the staircase and found Edward's room.

"It's such a habit, still, to want to be in a bedroom at night. It's weird. I definitely don't sleep anymore," whispered Bella, as Edward closed the door behind them.

"Do you miss it? Sleeping?" asked Edward, watching Bella jump effortlessly onto the bed. Bella lay back, placing her hands behind her head as Edward settled next to her on his side, one hand absently tracing small circles against her jeans-clad hip.

"Not anymore. Not with you here," replied Bella, unfolding one arm to reach over and stroke Edward's strong jaw. "And the horrible dreams…" Bella shuddered slightly, "Not missing those, either."

"And what about that? It seems like all your other abilities are intact except the one courtesy of Alice," spoke Edward, moving his hand up to her arm and rubbing her forearm gently with his thumb.

"I don't know. Maybe because it came through me only when I slept, that when sleeping ceased to be, I lost the ability," Bella had wondered herself before if that ability could have manifested itself in another way, but so far, that power had not re-appeared.

"I don't mind," she continued, "I'll leave that one to Alice. Do you think they've very frustrated that their abilities are blocked when I'm around? Does it frustrate you?"

Edward laughed softly and ran his free hand through his unruly hair.

"Me? Not at all. There's only one head I've ever wanted to get into and it's not available. I think Alice had been a bit frustrated because her visions are like a second nature to her. When all of a sudden she can't have any, I think she feels like a part of her is missing. Luckily, she can deal. I don't think she cares so much. And she would trade you any day for no power."

Bella pulled her hand back and flipped onto her side, smiling at Edward broadly.

"You know exactly the right thing to say, don't you," she teased.

"Nothing but the truth, love, " he replied, stroking her hair softly. Bella bent her head forward, suddenly on fire from his smoldering gaze.

But before their lips could meet, Edward pulled back slightly.

"Not so fast," he grinned. Bella opened her mouth to protest, but Edward placed a finger on her lips.

"I never did get my turn after your beautiful soliloquy in the woods the other day." Bella frowned slightly, wondering exactly what he was talking about.

"I've also found that my words have never served me the way I've wanted them to. Not when it comes to you," he paused again, glancing down at his hand and then back up at Bella.

"Bella, I know you've been using strict control as to not use your abilities on us. But I want you to use them on me. I want you to touch me with your barrier down, and see everything I have ever thought and ever y experience I've ever had. I want you to see _you_ through me. My words have never done you justice, love. I want you to see it all."

Bella 's sharp intake of breath surprised them both. She had never even imagined breaching that kind of privacy. Not on any of the Cullen's but least of all, not on Edward.

"Are you—"

"Sure? Yes. My heart is all yours Bella. It always has been, but now you'll know…well, you'll know everything," Edward spoke the words carefully, his eyes on Bella's uncertain ones.

"This will be everything, Edward. Everything you've ever thought."

He nodded, holding out both hands. Bella looked at them uncertainly at first and then she began to smile.

"I'm nervous," she laughed slightly.

"I'm the one who should be nervous. Please ignore the dirty teenage thoughts, okay?" he joked.

Bella took a breath and closed her eyes. She focused on relaxing her body. Controlling her powers was such a second nature by now, it took some effort to let that control go away. But when it did, she opened her eyes and looked one more time into Edward's eyes.

"I love you, Isabella Swan," Edward said softly, as Bella took his hands.

And then, in what felt like minutes, but was probably more like seconds, Bella watched as every thought Edward had ever thought flew at her.

A feeling of warmth flooded her body as she zeroed in on the thoughts riddled with her name and her image. Words reverberated through her head, accompanied by images and smells. She barely recognized herself in his thoughts—instead of the plain-jane human she had always imagined herself to have been, Edward's vision of her was far from plain…instead, she was the picture of beauty, she was perfection personified from the first time he'd really seen her. And there were all the important events laid out; their time in the meadow; their kisses. Holding her, but the frustration of always pulling back. And then leaving her outside behind Charlie's house in the forest. Bella felt her heart break for Edward. She hadn't realized how much he'd felt for her that day. Every single day.

_Oh. Oh._

And when he found out she was still alive, she felt his elation. And his fury that she'd been changed. But always, always, an overwhelming sense of love.

_Oh._

Bella pulled her hand away, wiping the non-existent tears in her eyes.

"You…"

"No one's ever loved anyone else more," he whispered.

Bella's shoulders shook with emotion.

"I don't know that that's true—there may be one exception," she whispered, arching an eyebrow.

Edward smiled gently.

"There's one more," and before Bella could respond, Edward placed his hand on her breast, over her heart, and the newly revealed (but not at all new) thought struck Bella.

Her eyes widened and her lips parted.

But she could not reply.

She stared at Edward in shock, her breathing stopped completely. Edward quickly lost his smile.

"But if you…if now is too soon…I just hoped maybe one day," he stuttered, pulling back his hand and running it self-consciously through his hair.

Bella regained her breathing quickly and broke out into a beaming smile.

"Edward. Yes. Yes, of course I will! Forever and ever, how could you ever doubt that, you silly vampire," she pressed her hands to his elated face softly and kissed him with everything she felt inside.

And, despite a lack of heart beat and warm blood, that was a whole lot.

"Forever and always," she whispered into his lips, his last thought lingering between them; large and white and flowery.

"But I was thinking, instead of something so big and scary and attention-getting…we could elope instead?"

Edward laughed and gathered his new fiancée into his arms, pinning her to the bed and covering her face and shoulders in kisses as he worked his fingertips across her stomach, causing her to screech with laughter.

Outside, a full moon shone brightly in its surroundings, illuminating the happy couple inside. And soon, a silence overtook the pair as caresses rendered words useless, and fingertips conveyed a deeper meaning.

And Bella knew for certain: this was finally the beginning of forever and always.

**A/N: Tear. Thank you guys for following this story and for always, always sending me your love and encouragement. It's meant more than I can say. I'd so love it if you could leave me a final review and sum up your feelings (good/bad/happy/sad) on Sleeping to Dream. It'll help me for my next story :)**

**Stay tuned for more from me. I'm only getting started :)**

**UPDATE: Check out ****Détruit, my newest story:)**


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